AIBU to worry CMS deductions could push my son into crisis?

That sounds too much. I have known of incidences were the mother has claimed to have not received money, which has skewed the calculations in their favour.

Double check with CMS what is believed to be in arrears. Forward on bank statement to show what was paid. Leave no doubt as to what your son has contributed.

Bloody hell @ThreadGuardDog yoi really do blindly live up to your user name don’t you.

The Op conveniently failed to mention social worker involvement in the Op. oh no - it was the cruel nasty ex withholding access

and then… whoopsie - actually social workers are (thankfully!) involved and setting parameters before he is permitted access

I looked at cms payments for my ex and it was just over £700 but he’s over £65k a year before tax. The maths just isn’t adding up

There’s some heartless types on here

I don’t know why MN bother with a see all button. Posters seem to prefer to make up ‘facts’ as they go along. The notion that this is actually someone’s life and not Teletubbies Have Fun On The Internet beggars belief.

Not necessarily - we have no idea why she stopped him from seeing the children. I would have expected social services to be involved on his release from hospital but the issues around any risk would have been covered in medical reports. And the courts have ruled that he needs his own accommodation to be able to have the children overnight, which is different from barring access altogether. Lots of assumptions here.

If you click on 'see all' on the OP's post, bottom right hand corner, you'll see all the information that she's posted and you can stop making up nonsense.

If you read my post properly (and the multiple others saying similar things) I didn’t say it was. I said if that’s genuinely his income and what they are planning to take then there is a mistake and they need to contact CMS asap.

ALL of this.

He's been refusing to support his children. And for long enough that there's a deduction of earnings.

Is this £9k still the reported arrears? Which he claims was from this year alone?..... No mate.

Because like a number of other posters this is a combination of not reading the updates and posting on old information, and wanting to stick it to an OP who is already in a difficult and distressing situation. About par for the course for AIBU lately.

Indeed

so the Op initially presenting it that the ex was withholding access is bollox

Social workers are heavily involved and have set parameters that he must meet before having access.

glad we agree on something

This post is absolutely batshit. There's not one ounce of truth in it. How on earth did you get it sooooo wrong poster?

Which is what I would expect after him being sectioned. Any safeguarding issue needs to be addressed.

What lump sum - he had no job between January and March because he was in hospital. How is a lump sum payable when you’re not earning ? He got his job back in March. The lump sum he owes is the arrears built up in CMS between march and now, which is the time CMS took to work things out and let him know what he should be paying. There is absolutely nowhere on this thread that OP is saying he shouldn’t pay for his kids. His ex has actually shot herself in the foot by going to CMS. He was voluntarily paying her £600 a month before that, and the actual CMS is now £450. So his kids have lost out because of her vindictiveness.

The children’s mother works. She’s the resident parent so she claims child benefit. If she wasn’t working she would claim UC which would pay an amount for her kids. Nobody is starving here, or running up debt.

so he needs his own home so he can facilitate having his children again and this is what the social worker involved in the case has advised him.

so it isn’t the ex keeping the children from him as per during this time his ex refused to let him see the children and he has not seen them since January,

social workers are extensively involved and controlling his access

Hardball because she wants the maintenance that she is due? There's no thought for her who has the children completely solo, she has had to explain to them why they suddenly couldn't see daddy. By the sounds of it he was just going to her house to see the children and if he did any cleaning whilst there, it was "for her", not because he wasn't actually taking any if the load, by having the children, he needed to pitch in somehow. The third child probably isn't on the claim. Since people have said his decision is wrong and the OP wanted to see the paperwork, all of a sudden, he isn't having the money taken off him.
He has MH issues the ex is safeguarding her children by going through the CMS and court.

Which he’s been using to set himself up in a home so that he can have contact with his children - a condition set by the courts. Also purchased a car to be a let to get to and from work. Any idea what it takes to come back from the kind of trauma this man has experienced, and start again ?

Exactly

A LOT of missing info

But surely this depends on how often he sees his kids too? If you’re receiving the benefits, I’m assuming you have the children far more than he does so have more outgoings as a result. He should get council tax reduction if he lives alone.

Key missing info - what the split re children?

So the cms calculator based on a take home of £1700, gives a CMS payment of £313.26 a month (£372 for 3 children) so you might want to first check the base payment - and that CMS have his correct salary.

Assuming he worked March- August without paying thats 6 months which would give a backpayment of £209 (£248) if they've split it over 9 months. So again check what CMS have as his salary. They also needs to take the third child off the claim as she is not his responsibility legally unless he adopted her?

Beyond that I would also advise that you look at Universal Credot as with that wage and rent payment he might be entitled to a top up....

The shitty dads do this anyway with the current system. My own dad was one of them! For a man that ‘only worked 12 hours a week’ he didn’t see us much, he also went on an awful lot of holidays and was always going out for drives in his fancy cars… 😂

If you take the case with my ex, you’d think he’d have a greater income than me. He’s in an NHS band 5 role, I’m an NHS band 3.
However, he’s not getting his income topped with universal credit, or getting a council tax reduction, or receiving the children benefit, or living in a HA home with extremely low rent like I am. I’m not paying a £200 a year registration fee for my job like he is, or paying for carers for my elderly parent like he is. This is what bothers me about CMS, none of this is taken into account. Say he reduced CM by £300, I’d be fine. I’d manage. If I requested £300 a month more from him, that’d be him fucked.

He stopped paying because he had been sectioned.

CMS should always be the first thing a non-resident parent pays for, ahead of all other expenses. I’m not saying that’s the law, I’m saying morally.

If he didn’t get paid for several months, surely that meant he got a lump sum when he did get paid? Most of that should have gone to make up his CMS payments. What did his children’s mother do for money during those months? Surely she’s run up debt trying to cope without it?

Thank goodness the CMS is doing its job in this case and actually getting back payments from a Dad who doesn’t want to pay.

You’re saying he needs 9 months to get back on his feet, but his kids need feeding etc in those months.

He doesn't have to pay anything for the child that it is not his.

If he’s getting stopped too much, then contact a solicitor and/orCMS.