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AIBU?

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AIBU for saying my DH needs to man tf up

369 replies

ambitiousqueen · 23/09/2026 09:31

DH has just gotten a very good job promotion, and I am very proud of him. Obviously. Lovely salary, lovely title, everyone congratulating him etc. BUT. He is destined for an even greater promotion (CEO level). Don't ask how I know this.
The problem is DH keeps saying he doesn't want to "get involved in office politics" and that “nature will take its course” I've tried encouraging him. I've said, hypothetically, if there was a person standing between my DH and the CEO position, then perhaps one might consider... removing the obstacle. metaphorically I mean
Also, I may have suggested that DH invite the current CEO round for a nice little dinner.Purely hospitality, obviously. DH said he was worried about the consequences, particularly the whole "divine judgement, eternal damnation" side of things. Blah blah blah
Honestly, he's overthinking it.
I am NOT saying DH should kill anyone. Obviously not... at least not with his eyes open. I'm only saying that hypothetically, if one wanted to rise to the very top, one might need to show a little more ambition
AIBU to think DH needs to man up and seize his opportunity?
FWIW, I’ve already laid out the plan, and the metaphorical dagger is just waiting to be used.

OP posts:
Happyjoe · 23/09/2026 10:16

Your husband sounds a better person than you!

And great to get a good job on merit, not by being an utter c**t.

Damnloginpopup · 23/09/2026 10:14

Clearly your mind is full of scorpions. With that in mind I suggest that you invite the big boss over for dinner and look like the innocent flower, but be the serpent under it.

EmailsaysOOO · 23/09/2026 10:13

No idea what I've just read but no..You need to give it a rest OP. You can sort out your career, leave your DH to deal with his.

PollyBell · 23/09/2026 10:12

NotTheDramaMum · 23/09/2026 09:51

NTA!!! Lovely promotion, lovely salary, but why stop there? You’re right to want more for him. 💅

Edited

Yeah women are not capable of anything themselves

Morepositivemum · 23/09/2026 10:12

You do you- you go get a promotion or whatever it is, take over the world but leave him to enjoy what he’s earned for now- I’d hate someone saying ‘you know, you can do even better!’ Plus: the phrase mss as n up is one of those horrible horrible phrases used throughout history to make people feel less than.

PollyBell · 23/09/2026 10:11

JudgeJ · 23/09/2026 10:05

Sounds like a lot of officers' wives who like to wear their husband's rank, a neighbour one collared me as I arrived home from work to proudly announce 'We've got our Majority!' she was most put out when I, a mere civilian, had to ask what she meant! Apparently her husband was being promoted to Major!

And i bet none of them put the effort in themselves living through others achievements it seems

Fiftyandme · 23/09/2026 10:11

Goodness, you know what happened to Lady Macbeth, yes?

DannyDeever · 23/09/2026 10:10

BMW58 · 23/09/2026 09:58

The OP has obviously written her opening post as a parody of Macbeth - look at her name 🙄

Not very well done either

2/10 OP.

I disagree, it's bloody brilliant. 9.5/10

Props to OP.

GeorgeMichaelsCat · 23/09/2026 10:09

You need to lay off the 🍷

DannyDeever · 23/09/2026 10:08

This one is simple. Imply he's a coward by saying something like:

“Art thou afeard
To be the same in thine own act and valour
As thou art in desire?”

Then he'll bend to your will, and you'll both live happily ever after. (I think.)
.
Watch out for moving foliage in your garden.

BTW, do you believe in ghosts? No particular reason.

JudgeJ · 23/09/2026 10:05

Xmasbaby11 · 23/09/2026 09:37

You sound over invested. He's only just got this promotion - let him settle into it.

Sounds like a lot of officers' wives who like to wear their husband's rank, a neighbour one collared me as I arrived home from work to proudly announce 'We've got our Majority!' she was most put out when I, a mere civilian, had to ask what she meant! Apparently her husband was being promoted to Major!

Lifelover16 · 23/09/2026 10:05

Is this a joke thread? Hello 1960 and Terry and June

RumPidgeon · 23/09/2026 10:03

Is this your first attempt at writing a cheap telenovela??

AnotherOneIsntFussed · 23/09/2026 10:00

If only you were man you could do it yourself.

BMW58 · 23/09/2026 09:58

PurpleLovecats · 23/09/2026 09:53

What is going on today? Multiple really bizarre posts. Feel like I need to be drunk to understand!

The OP has obviously written her opening post as a parody of Macbeth - look at her name 🙄

Not very well done either

2/10 OP.

NotTheDramaMum · 23/09/2026 09:58

The “metaphorical dagger” comment absolutely sent me But yes girl, stand by your man and get him that CEO position!

AnotherOneIsntFussed · 23/09/2026 09:56

PurpleLovecats · 23/09/2026 09:53

What is going on today? Multiple really bizarre posts. Feel like I need to be drunk to understand!

No, just Brush Up Your Shakespeare!

NotTheDramaMum · 23/09/2026 09:55

@Enigma54 we are not talking abt this rn

PurpleLovecats · 23/09/2026 09:53

What is going on today? Multiple really bizarre posts. Feel like I need to be drunk to understand!

OooPourUsACupLove · 23/09/2026 09:53

Anyway. When shall we three meet again? I can do next Thursday...

NotTheDramaMum · 23/09/2026 09:51

NTA!!! Lovely promotion, lovely salary, but why stop there? You’re right to want more for him. 💅

OooPourUsACupLove · 23/09/2026 09:51

Almost the same scenario with my DH.

The "obstacles" were successfully removed and all was good, until one of them turned up at dinner uninvited and put the boot in !!!

Well. After that we tried to keep going but really my heart wasn't in it anymore. It all ended up very messy and he is no longer employed.

NotTheDramaMum · 23/09/2026 09:49

Um I don’t get why everyone is on this poor dh side… I’m a girls girl babe dw ill always be with you and support you

for the sticker : not life but wife

Frustrated Buzz Lightyear GIF
Heronwatcher · 23/09/2026 09:48

Hello Robert Jenrick’s wife.

OP why don’t you tell us about your own rewarding career? Where did you go for your summer holidays? Do you have any interesting hobbies?

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