To think hotel designers should at least have once slept in a room before being allowed to design a room.

I think it might be your anatomy that's off, I've never had to take the shower head out of the holder to wash off the shower cream foam that I put in that area.

Am I?! I’ve seen one or two mention the issue of not wanting to get their hair wet (not an issue for me as my hair is long and I can just tie it out of the way) but otherwise nothing on the bum issue but I might have missed it.

My pet hate in hotels is when the ONLY shower is one of those rubbish hand showers held up on a pole. They are invariably pathetic. Or just low pressure showers in general. I like to feel the water on my back like a massage!

We had a holiday house in Turkey that we used to rent out when we first built it. I bought what felt like 100s of hangers, loads of good towels and good bedding. I don’t recall having to ever replace any of them so I guess our renters weren’t kleptomaniacs.

Agree about the showers! If l wanted to do handstands and acrobatics in the nude, l would have taken up a job in a specialist Amsterdam nightclub. 😀

i quite agree lots of designers should try the hotels especially the beds including the comfort
the size of the kettles be lucky to get one cup never mind two
such tiny bathrooms you turn round and burn your bum on the towel rail
tiny baths so you have to sit with your legs and feet out of the bath like a yoga pose
very hot rooms with no way of turning down
duvets either too heavy or not heavy enough so you spend all night wrestling with it
not enough pillows we do not always want one pillow
grubby old pictures that were popular in the 1970s

In a disabled room where the cleaner has parked the shower about six feet up so I can't reach it. Some cleaners don't do this

I’m quite thin, so I only have to stand with my legs slightly appart to create ‘access’, and then I use my hands to direct the water and lavage the area. It’s not hard, and I’m meticulous about keeping clean.

Can’t believe I’m describing this 😂

I listened to a podcast about pillows, which wasn't as dull as it sounds and was part of a BBC series Sliced Bread. On there they mentioned inappropriate depth pillows in hotels.

They said that the right thickness of pillows for people who sleep on their sides is dependant on the width of their shoulders and if you found yourself in a hotel with a pillow that was too thin, you can make it a bit better by putting a folded towel underneath.

Also, water doesn’t run vertically downwards, it follows the contours of your body. Physics innit. (Surface tension, cohesion etc)

Just remembered the hotel in Toulouse where I stayed for a few days for a meeting. Good hotel, not cheap, great breakfast, fantastically well organised meeting rooms. There was a kettle and a selection of coffee sachets and herbal teas (there will always be Verveine among the herbal teas in France) in the room but the only cups available in the room were espresso-sized single-use plastic cups that went soft when you put hot water in. I had my travel cup with me that I could use but several of my colleagues started bringing proper cups from the breakfast service to their rooms.

Why did I not know these were a thing?!

It's not really a holiday until you spend 10 mins trying to work out the lighting and sower arrangments in your hotel room.

We stayed in an (otherwise great) hotel in France this summer where the shower had been so oddly designed the poor receptionist had to give detailed instructions on how to use it at check in.

@Igneococcus French hotels seem to specialise in the saddest collection of in room drinks. The hotel we stayed at this summer had the world's tinest kettle, tiny cups, o e 500ml bottle.of waem mineral water and the most pathetic array of drinks stuff (two Monoprix budget brand mint tea bags, one Liptons black tea bag and a tube of instant Nescafe granules).

Have to agree with many of these. My two which fuck me off no end and one is a non negotiable now :

No separate bathroom. I do not want a tiny glass fronted toilet cubicle inches from the bed. Even if I'm travelling solo I don't want to shit in the bedroom. I scour pictures on TripAdvisor to prevent this as it's so prevalent now and I refuse to stay in a room like this.

Fixed showerheads. Obviously designed by a man. This is my bugbear with Premier Inns and Hampton Inns, they never include a handheld shower. Which is a pain as the rest of their product is consistently solid.

I know, I spent a lot of time in French hotels. I bring some tea and coffee supplies with me now when I go because it's so depressing when you get there late at night and you can't even make a cup of tea. As long as there is a kettle I'm ok but there isn't always a kettle.

I would like to add to the list shower heads that increase the water pressure - the water bounces off you at all angles and soaks the bathroom. I stayed in a hotel the other day where the pressure was so high that it hurt my nipples 🙈

Thick pillows that reduce down to nothing so you basically get smothered when you lay on them sideways

Also toilet roll holders that are behind where you’re sitting on the toilet so you have to pull a muscle turning around like an owl to grab some paper

I do this as well. I have a toiletry bag that is just full of tea.

I agree with pretty all of these mentioned so far but my biggest one is showers you have to basically fully get into to turn on so you’re blasted with freezing cold water first thing in the morning.

Also those tiny glasses for juice at breakfast. Why???

We stayed in a hotel in a major chain, where the breakfast room was so narrow, that if I walked up to the food area and someone was walking towards me, we couldn’t both pass - one had to stand aside close to a table and chairs. You can imagine what it was like at peak breakfast time - it was like negotiating an obstacle course, with a stream of people going both ways!

Whatever idiot designed that room, never had to use it! We won’t ever be using it again either, nor that hotel chain if we can help it!

Me neither. To get to the space between arsehole and clit you face the water, open your legs a bit and run water down the front. Are other people bending over and washing their foof from the back?

And only contain 3 coat hangers each for 2 people on holiday for a week.

If you want to feel true existential misery stand near the door of your hotel room in front of the only full length mirror under the lighting provided dressed only in your underwear. That sight will haunt your entire holiday.

Horrible staticky carpets that feel weird under your feet. Everything in shades of grey including the faux wood-effect floor. LED strip lights in weird colours, but not enough light on the mirror to do your makeup. Bedside lighting that doesn’t illuminate your book. Windows that don’t open. Curtains that don’t curtain.

Just stayed somewhere with a motion sensor on the bathroom so the lights came on full and a noisy fan started up. I don't need a fan running for several minutes after a quick wee, and I usually pee in the dark during the night to make it easier to go back to sleep.

Glass on ensuites in twin rooms is my biggest pet hate. I travel with my teenage daughter. I'd guess that most people who stay in twin rooms are not intimate with each other. Therefore, they don't wish to see each other showering or pooing. Probably goes for some couples too to be fair.

Airbnbs with cleaning instructions. Strip beds, put dishwasher on as you leave - okay. Clean bathroom, sweep floor, empty bins - er, fuck off. What am I paying a cleaning fee for?

Same in new build houses. I looked at some yesterday with a friend.
No space in the kitchen for the bins.
Washing machine space in some of the houses is only big enough for a small slimline style one
There is a recessed bit in the hallway. The houses have 0 storage, so almost everyone is likely to turn that space into a cupboard surely
The towel rail on the bathroom is the other end of the room to the shower
The houses all have parking for 1 car and the roads are single width. What household in a rural town only has one car now. There is also no turning space on the end of the cul delivery sacs so getting in and out of the end houses could be tricky. I forsee parking nightmares

It's like these people have never lived in houses.

And yes, I share the frustrations about hotels too!
I think some of it is older hotels, built back in the days when mobile phones weren't really a thing and we didn't all need plug sockets by the bed. But other things - heating, bathroom lights, glass bathrooms and fixed showers, drive me nuts too!