Am I a WhatsApp psychopath?

Cutting off otherwise lovely family members because they send annoyingly long WhatsApp messages? I feel that would be an AIBU thread started right there, and I would BU

Haha - yes sometimes, you got me!

In seriousness though, if you're doing something with your toddler and are constantly distracted by your phone I think that's really sad. I guess it depends how many messages we're talking. If it's 1 every few hours I guess it's fine to reply whilst with kids or at work. But if it's constantly pinging, then not so much.

What a strange and unpleasant reply.

Yup this is my life. So freeing!! I've also stopped anyone from being able to add me to group chats. They can send me an invite, but not just add me without warning. Much better for me.

I don't reply to non-urgent messages straight away because I don't have the time or capacity to get into a full conversation. I don't owe anyone my time just because they've decided t text me

I've turned off my online status and read reports on any app that I can to avoid all this drama

Do you need to sit down with a cup of tea and your reading glasses to reply to your WhatsApp’s? 😉

This really made me laugh. This is my teen as well. Usually my answer is "You only sent it 3 minutes ago!" or "I was driving .... on my way to get YOU!"

I don't think this is wimpy at all, I think it's healthy.

I think it's really bad for our brains - and our kids, and our work productivity - if we're constantly distracted and feel we have to check and reply to every message immediately. I still do it sometimes! But I think it's not a great habit to be in.

You can see the first couple of lines in a message w/o opening it. So, not always necessary to open it.
If your friend has your chat open then it will blue tick and your friend might not have actually read it.

I mean, I guess if you use Whatsapp mainly for organising things and exchanging information then that's important but most of my messages are mates chatting shit and the village group pinging off about dog poo so I'm more than happy to ignore it!

My DDs have granted me an exception for being ‘old’. They know my generation does things differently…. I won’t be pressured into replying until am ready. And all my friends are the same!

Her demands for you to conform to her expectations is causing her misery. And your not accepting she gets aggy about it causes yours.

Personally I go hours if not days before responding. Because nothing is that important. Its all forgotten about in a year.

I think your approach is normal and fine. I'm only a few years older than you. However, my 20 something children have a different opinion about not replying and won't open messages if they can't reply. I think that's silly.

I will always check if messages are urgent but, if it's not, it can wait if I'm busy. Then I have time to reply properly, or check my diary, or whatever else is needed. I'm not having my life ruled by my phone.

Ugh. I'll answer it if it needs answering (and not because somebody wants to be validated with an instant response to show that I drop everything the moment they want attention).

No point sending me a voice note, they just piss me off because it's hard enough hearing them in real time, never mind when they're dawdling around what sounds like the hard shoulder of the M3 or standing in front of a wind turbine. Just send a text and I'll deal with it if necessary when I get a chance - if it's urgent, which means actually urgent, not to assuage a sense of rejection, call.

It really is a shame they never made sounds and a way to actually talk to people directly on them new fangled mobile telephone things.....

They really are. Amazes me too.

I don’t have my blue ticks turned on or my active status I’ll reply when I’m ready

I can only assume that what your wife thinks is important are not things that you think are important.
She might be asking what you want for dinner or if you paid some bill or if your chest is still hurting.
You might not realise she has to plan the shop, needs to use the utility you may not have paid or is checking if you are having a heart attack. Although I suspect you'd reply if you thought it was about you.

Women do a lot of behind the scene stuff, which makes men feel it is unimportant. If you keep asking other women to denigrate your wife behind her back, you will possibly be heading for a divorce, at which point you will discover all of those little silly things that were "unimportant" need to be done.

I’m too busy to notice any of these things

I just knew this can't be a woman
Bit odd to gender this. I'm a woman (generation below OP) and function exactly the same way as him.

I just don't think immediate replies are necessary 99% of the time. Few things are that serious, surely?

I am baffled at the blue tick obsession. Surely people know if you have sent a message that isn't 'Help me im dying' then you don't have to respond that second? Are people that entitled now?

If you switch previews on you can read the message and even reply without blue ticks

Not for that kind of message obviously. Not that I get many of those.