To be suprised schools still do French exchanges ?what with the safeguard risks

He probably didn't even need to pass a DBS. No checks were done when my DC did an exchange.

And this is what people who are saying the kids have mobiles and can raise the alarm about anything strange fail to realise- kids often don’t know how to articulate why something feels off and are worried about making a fuss.

I remember doing an exchange where porn magazines had been left under the bed in our room (me and another girl). We didn’t tell anyone but actually felt really wary of the dad the whole time which did not make for a relaxing experience. Understanding things more now, I expect they were left there on purpose and he got something out of the idea that we’d stumble upon them. I have no doubt he would have passed a DBS but that didn’t mean he wasn’t a weirdo.

Teachers are not there in the homes where the students are in the evenings and night and weekend.

In my school days it was the teacher that went on the exchange that was the predator!
my friend had a day off Ill, he went to visit her. They came back to uk in a relationship (obviously a secret one)

Is it with school? Would think that’s ok as teachers will also be there and it will be properly arranged.

Funny my DS is just thinking of going on a French exchange. I’m keen for him to go if he wants to, but wondering if 12 is a bit young?

Teach them what they can do if they feel uncomfortable about a situation. Yes you might not be able to stop sexual assault but this could also happen in her own school or in a future work environment. You can’t just not do anything out of fear - equip her to be able to handle things to the extent possible.

I'm a big fan of language learning opportunities, and think some form of french exchange is an amazing opportunity.

However one day on my exchange I was really tired and stayed home while my exchange partner and her mum went shopping. My exchange partner's dad came in my bedroom in his dressing gown and took it off, repeatedly saying "Favour, favour". I was horrified and barely spoke to anyone in the family for the rest of the THREE WEEK stay. I was 13.

My DS was desperate to go so we did let him but he had a phone and messaged us morning and night. He had a great time. Thankfully my DD showed no interest in going.

We were DBS checked before the exchange partner came to us but no such checks were done abroad.

If you don’t allow your child any experiences you are stopping them from obtaining valuable learning and development opportunities. This will impact and reduce their life opportunities.

dont just stop them from going or having experiences due to your fears.

What a shame, I did about seven exchanges in France and Germany as a teenager and it really helped with the languages and with understanding the cultures. My children did French exchanges and it was good for opening their eyes to the world outside Britain.

How old is your child?
Do they go on sleepovers?

They still do them at our school but only 20 ish go out if 150 in the year

My kids did them seven and eight years ago. Safeguarding didn't cross my mind. They were 15/16 and teachers were around and they had phones. I can’t believe how scared people are these days.

Risk assessment is about balance- risk cannot and should not be eliminated from life. The families are not random plenty is known about them. There is a small risk in all new interactions. They are now rare because we are a people who are increasingly willing to sue schools, so it is not the level of risk to students which is heightened it is the level of risk to the school's insurance.

I think people worry too much these days. I did three exchanges when at school and they were all positive experiences. It took us out of our comfort zones and was a great way to see how people live in another country. We were always on our own in the families too, which forces you to make an effort to be understood.

My DS recently did a trip to Spain and they stayed with families but with classmates, never alone. I assume this was for safety reasons but I do think it takes away from the experience.

Our school ran 2 German exchanges in the 80s which were brilliant. There were several trips and we were all in the German school together . Our German teacher was around to sort out any problems.

My DD didn’t do an exchange but went to a language school in Asia which was pretty life changing for her.

Oh let them go if they want to, OP! Exchanges have been running forever and they are the best way of improving language skills, particularly if the participants really want to go.

My dad who is in his 80s now told me a story about being sent off on a German exchange when he was about 14 or 15 that my grandmother had organised through an advert in the Times or something similar. He was dropped at the ferry in Dover and then had to make his own way there by train the other side, all obviously without the aid of a phone etc. The first my grandparents knew that he was safe and well was when he arrived back on the UK side of the ferry a week later. Now that is a different world! He said he absolutely loved it. At least it’s nothing like that anymore 😂

We have an exchange student arriving today. Everyone over 16 in the house had to have a DBS check.

Great memories from my French exchange experience. Loved every minute of it.

Being this risk averse is quite limiting. Not everyone wants to live like that, which presumably why it is still allowed.

This is NOT why young people have anxiety.

Young people have anxiety due to extreme uncertainty over their future security, increased pressure, lack of connection in their every day lives.

The risk isn't higher, it's just openly discussed now.

The situations young people were put in 40 years ago were unassessed.

Given modern standard practice in relation to safeguarding of young people, it does seem surprising for stays in strangers' homes to be authorised.

This is an example of parental over caution ruining an enriching experience for children. It's very sad. Are the risks zero? No. Are the risks incredibly low and the benefits life changing/ enriching - yes. The risk of being in a car accident are significantly greater but that's not at the front of every parents mind, thankfully . This over analysis and worry impacts kids development and mental health, which should be a far greater consideration for parents. Let your kids stretch their wings and grow, don't hold them back for minute risks and perceived dangers around every corner, it's far more damaging to them.

What a shame. I did this at school and it was so cool.However, i understand your fears. As a parent i think you must do what you think is best. Your child will get over it.