Apologies as this is a long post. I recently went through a horrible experience of being stalked. ExH didn't know what had been happening until I was forced to explain everything when stalker contacted him telling lies about my fidelity during our marriage. At that point ExH said he didn't know why I wouldn't give him another chance and we should try again (we split due to his control, jealousy and emotional abuse. The last straw was suicide threats).
My ExH supported me through the stalking and criminal investigation even received upsetting communication from my stalker. But it seems my ExH had an ulterior motive of trying to get me back. He was kinder, calmer and more tolerant. When I said I didn't think it was what I wanted, his behaviour changed. He has barely seen our children since, when before that he would have them at least overnight once a week. He blames it on anxiety and he says he can't cope. This means I have no evenings to myself (i believe this is a way of controlling me still) and I have to essentially parent my kids 100% as I don't have any other support.
I work full time, trying to balance collecting my youngest from school and trying to complete all my hours. My stalker is in prison but will be released in the next 6 weeks or so. I'm still trying to come to terms with what he did to me and accept that his prison sentence has been cut to 1/3 due to early release scheme.
I'm absolutely exhausted.
ExH said he was having kids tonight, then changed his mind, upset my older child in text messages and said in the new year he may be moving and not living close by. My child was sobbing. I'm disgusted with his behaviour, he couldn't have them for one night; complained about cooking a meal they asked for and basically told them if they don't behave he would waltz them back to me.
AIBU to actually want to block him out of our lives?? My children deserve better and he can actually be so unkind to them sometimes. It breaks my heart that he can't put in the effort. Him having them would give me a much needed break but why should they have to endure his misery and lack of effort if he did have them for one measly night? Plus if he rips it all apart by moving away then they'll be heartbroken.
I am flipping between immense sadness and absolute rage with him.