To be furious hospital have allowed DS to come home after overdose

Your DH is correct about not asking questions.
First practical thing is for you to lock all medicine and sharps away.

Can you take the week off work? Just so you can cook good food, watch films, basic things. Does he let you care for him?

How far did you move house, has he moved school? Just wondering if he had better friends before if he could go back to the old school.

This

Also OP, dont dismiss this next bit out of hand, can you and your husband take emergency leave for a month and go and stay somewhere in the middle of nowhere with him and do tons and tons and tons of activities together?

Have you got other kids?

Make sure he feels loved by his family spend time with him if you can If he feels his family love him he might feel more motivated If he feels rejected itcould add to his problems

Okay OP. Remove all medication from the house or lock it up in a combination safe. Do not use a code you use anywhere else that Ds might know.

Remove all alcohol.

He needs to have something to do to replace the time he used to spend on his phone/the internet. I think you are right to remove it.

Personally I think you need to do some work on rebuilding a relationship with him. Get outdoors, have a hobby together, give him something that helps you bond and takes up his time. Even if he doesn’t really engage to start with, chip away slowly.

I think you need to stop assuming that anyone else is going to come and help. You might get to the top of the list for referrals eventually but if he won’t engage then your back to square 1. I’ll never forget when I was supporting a family member who self harmed at 14 and the GP sort of shrugged and said it was very common amongst teenagers these days.

Did he confirm he was trying to end his life?

Often young people of this age use an overdose to self harm rather than actually kill themselves. The difference may not sound like a difference but it is in terms of what sort of intervention is needed.

I dont agree with your husband by the way, you both need to help him open up and help you understand what is happening for him. That doesnt mean of course firing questions at him but helping him communicate what the reason was, what he wants, what he thinks.

Can he text it to you, write a letter, do a voice note?

Can you afford or even borrow to pay for private therapy?

By the way, there isnt anything you could have done, you mustnt blame yourself or think necessarily this was preventable.

What was the overdose by the way and did the blood tests confirm it?

The only reason he would be kept in hospital is if there was a physical reason to prevent discharge. The work for his MH would be locality long term work, however if he isnt going to say why he did it (and it probably didnt help that he wouldnt see the CAMHS worker on his own), what intervention or support can take place?

This is likely to be termed behavioural by CAMHS. It means there isnt a MH condition that can be diagnosed or treated. CAMHS wont work with children who wont really engage with them.

What would you like to see happening OP? When you use the word support and help, what is it you envisage?

I dont think CAMHS are very likely to prescribe anti depressants (if we assume he is depressed or anxious) but even if they did, it would be counteracted by the drugs and alcohol.

Do you have family abroad he can be sent to live with, or even elsewhere in the country? Many families do this to break the cycle.

My eldest took two overdoses and self harmed for years. Both times we just got sent home. I had to keep on and on at CAMHS and get referrals from school and gp separately on numerous occasions to keep pushing them to see her. I wish you luck xx