To think it's impossible to work full time and keep a clean/tidy house without a cleaner?

It is possible. You just have to get rid of 50% of your stuff.

We have a big house (5 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms), a big garden where we grow things, full-time jobs, 2 kids, and a third one on the way.

A few years ago, we started plastic-free living. Slowly, I began getting rid of plastic — I mean everything, including furniture, beauty products, kitchen accessories, children’s items, etc.
I was shocked by how little we had left and also by how difficult it is to find or buy non-plastic items. I didn’t go crazy washing every plastic item before getting rid of it; I just gradually replaced things when needed. We have fewer clothes because we don’t buy polyester. My bathroom routine is literally all soap bars, and all my beauty products come in glass jars.

We do have a lovely home, and it isn’t empty or minimalist in the sense of having nothing. I just choose different materials: antique and wooden furniture, wooden or metal utensils, glass containers, and other items made from natural, long-lasting materials. This way, I’m not surrounded by mountains of stuff that just gets moved around the house and never get used.

Also, constant tidying makes a huge difference. My kids are young, but they don’t go upstairs to sleep until they tidy up, put dirty clothes in the laundry room, etc.

While my husband or I put them to bed, the other person cleans downstairs — dishes, hoovering, taking out the bins, and so on. That way, by 7:30, we have a clean house and can relax.

We use weekends to catch up on bathrooms and do a very deep clean of the house, probably once every two months. I take unpaid leave for this because a professional deep-cleaning service would cost so much, and I’m never fully happy with the results anyway. I’d rather lose a day’s pay and do it myself.

Lower your standards or get a cleaner. These are your options.

Im anal about my teeth AND my sink and bath. At the same time. So there 🦷

I even clean around the bottom of the toilet while swilling mouthwash. Im dedicated to multitasking 😂

I was surprised how many of my friends have a cleaner. I thought it was only rich people!

I don’t feel so bad about my house, now… It’s so hard to keep on top of everything at home.

I cleaned for people with busy jobs. I didn't judge any of them

It's probably possible if everyone is very tidy and you have minimal stuff...I've never managed it myself and I don't work, I have 4 kids and too much crap

I used to be a domestic cleaner, most of my clients worked full time . You'd be suprised how many of them didn't want anyone to know they had a cleaner. Get yourself one and keep it you're little secret

I’d say the issue is full time work exactly, it’s DCs (ages, personalities, schedules) plus DH extras (eg yours with full on renovation project on top of work). It’s just generally a lot going on. But Yanbu!

Ive had an electric toothbrush since I was a child! As you can tell, I’m very anal about my dental hygiene 🤣

My house is immaculate Monday to Friday because I'm barely in it to make any mess! It's when I take time off or at weekends that it starts to become untidy.

Kitchen wiped down, including hob and sink, and dishwasher switched on every evening. Emptied in the morning before work while I'm waiting on the toaster to pop.

Vac every evening after work. Wipe down toilet/sink every other day.

Sunday I do a mini reset where I'll vac the stairs, the carpets upstairs, change bedding, do the dusting, a deeper clean of the bathroom. Takes less than an hour.

The key is definitely to have much less stuff. I had the same attitude as you, OP, where I thought it was a storage issue, but it's really not. Nobody really needs that drawer full of old charging cables, or bathroom cabinet full of half-used shampoo bottles. Get rid and it gets much easier!

Yes, differing energy levels play a huge part in this. Having the energy for a "quick blitz" after dinner, versus coming home after work, having to make dinner for you and the DC, then collapsing on the sofa too tired to speak or move and wondering how you're going to make it up the stairs to bed...

I don’t deny it’s possible, I deny it’s possible to brush your teeth well! (I’m being light hearted before this turns into a bigger thing than necessary!)

Get an electric toofybrush, mine beeps when its time to move to the next row of teeth so i dont have the worry of whether ive brushed one row longer than another. Free your other hand to clean! 😂

Actually - this is entirely possible - i wiped down the counter top last night while i was brushing my teeth (i had sprayed the top with disinfectant earlier)😂

But if you don’t have to clean you’re literally buying more leisure time, that’s how I see it anyway. Nothing is more precious than time, that’s how I see it, we’ve had a cleaner since we were much lower income in a much smaller home, because the cost seemed so much smaller than the value of what was gained.

It's about routine. 15 minutes a day at a regular time preferably when your kid has gone to bed will make a huge difference. Do exactly the same routine - listen to a podcast while you do it, and time yourself. If you do this every single day, you'll be on top of most daily mess, and it will come naturally. You DH can absolutely manage the same once a day however hard he works.

If you and your DH do an hour each weekend (hoovering, bathrooms, laundry,) plus one monthly task, that will deal with most of the cleaning.

As I say; refuse to believe 🤣

Little and often for me - and i make the kids do stuff - one child stripped all the beds and the other helped me pack the clothes away -they vacuum and mop their own rooms and tidy up after themselves - i mop while im on lunch or if i have to listen into a meeting without giving any input, i do the dishwasher. I try and make two pies a week and freeze so while the kids are doing homework, i can squeeze in something else. Im a night owl tho - and require not loads of sleep.

I manage it perfectly fine. Having a posh electric toothbrush probably helps tbf.

I dont have a cleaner, and i dont want one
...but id love to live with people that noticed mess and worked with me to keep the house clean and tidy.
DH seems to actively work against having a tidy house - we have a basket in the hall for hats/gloves in winter and caps in summer. He puts his hat on the hall or kitchen table every day! He built a cupboard for sports gear...but it mostly gets dumped in the hall.
And there is always a selection of his clothes on the bedroom floor.
He very occassionally (like once a year) does a thorough deep clean and wants to throw lots of things away but barely does anything in between.
Teen DS hoovers when reminded 78 times

Yeah I get that, but not WHILE brushing teeth. When I’m brushing my teeth I’m focussing on getting into all the nooks and crannies and even amount of time, not cleaning something else.

While I don't enjoy housework more than sleep or leisure time, I don't regard it as something to be done instead of sleep or leisure, but something that is just part of life, to be factored in with everything else.
I don't have a partner, I do have a teenager at home and he pulls his weight as he should. I work full time.
I'm pretty sure most people who work full time DON'T have a cleaner.

Yes, more storage only works if you go through it when it's not being used productively and throw things out to make space. The reason I want to go through the drawers of our unit in the lounge is becuase I don't think anyone has opened them in months, they're all full.... and the clutter is building up on the table instead. So a bit of ruthlessness is needed and it occurred to me that if I get rid of this shit - much of it toys the DC have grown out of - they could use these drawers to shove their school bags or extra stuff into every day instead or I could when they leave them lying on the floor

Re the ADHD brain, I get that. I'd recommend making it a competition with yourself. Identify those 20 minutes - for me, after breakfast rush is the best time - and just tell yourself to do as much as you can, as fast as you can! You can get that dopamine hit by being really focused ons eeing how much you can get done (and I'm convinced I burn a few extra calories as I rush up and down the steps carrying laundry, dusting etc! )

It does depend on your standards. I think my house is basically always clean and tidy. But! There is still stuff that needs doing. I couldn’t tell you, for example, when anybody last wiped the front of all the kitchen cabinets.

Some of this depends on whether you’re naturally tidy person me and my kids are, my boyfriend is not but he doesn’t own a great deal of stuff.

The most fundamental thing is does everything have a home. If everything does not have a home then you will never be tidy because you will always have mountains of stuff which is waiting to get a home.

On the actual cleaning I think some people think that clean people have hours at a time where they intensively clean. Whereas I am basically always cleaning a little bit. So when I’m cooking, I’m cleaning up the kitchen. When I’ve had lunch, I wipe down the table. I washed my hands in the bathroom I realised that there’s a load of fluff all over the sink so I wipe it down then. So I couldn’t say to you “I spent x hours a week cleaning” because the only big tasks which do take dedicated time are the floors and a deep clean of the bathroom. Which to be honest, get done weekly or fortnightly.