Sibling graduation is an exceptional curcumstance

Daughter, not son…

Son? It’s her daughter!

It’s your child you do what you want. I’d never of asked in the first place. You child sounds like they’re doing exactly what is expected of them at school and doing it very well. One day won’t make a difference. Congratulations on your other child’s graduation

That's bonkers

But trying to compare things like graduations and bereavements to determine exceptional circumstances doesn't work, because they simply aren't comparable, it's not about population averages for common events, so statistics here are irrelevant.
A graduation is an individual achievement, perhaps a nice wee family milestone, whereas a bereavement can be absolutely devastating.

I know that funerals have been allowed.

I live in Wales and my 13 year old is coming to my graduation. I have put in request to school and am taking no response as a positive although I had spoken to headteacher before hand anyway. I am hoping it will be interesting enough for her and inspirational. I feel it's tough for schools to maintain attendance but taking them to a graduation isn't just on a whim.

I want to know was IS an exceptional circumstance as it seems nothing is.

My daughter had her request for an authorised absence for a dyslexia assessment declined. Schools are bonkers these days

To give the flip side here, here are some periods of leave that have been granted to me as a teacher.

Turning up an hour late to take my child to his first day at school (I had no class to cover as only y7s and y11s were in that day and my form were y9s.)

An afternoon off to see my child in his nativity play.

Funeral of a friend

Siblings graduation (for the umpteenth time but he really wanted me there.)

In return I have

Gone in unpaid for two days when OFSTED were in to help colleagues and be a general presence around the school (I am part time and I don’t work Tuesdays or Wednesdays which is when they came in.)

Done many an unpaid revision session in the holidays

Done extra detention duty to spare colleagues this pleasure

Swings and roundabouts. Schools forget sometimes that goodwill both ways just makes life so very much easier.

But that’s the point, bereavement is granted because very often a child needs time to process things. No one “needs” to go to a sibling’s graduation, having to sit through your own is bad enough.

This.

I didn’t think ours were boring. There was an honorary graduate there who gave an interesting and inspiring talk. We had drinks in the faculty, photographs and then the family meal - and we had a lovely meal the night before as family all met up. This was at Birmingham, Leeds, two at Sheffield Uni and a call to the bar in London. All great memorable and interesting days.

Maybe because we had to fly in and stay overnight before and after the ceremony I found special places for breakfast and after the event it just worked better for us.

Weddings are not exceptional under the rules schools have to follow.
Being bereaved leaves some kids unable to function for days, and upset for months afterwards. Comparing the importance of an outing to watch someone walk across a stage to be handed a dummy scroll to an actual bereavement is grotesque.

I’m not sure what is classed as exceptional if I’m honest. We were turned down for one day for a family funeral. Just took it as unauthorised but I was surprised!

Schools don't stop you taking your child out of school, they just treat it as an unauthorised absence

Absolutely baffled by the level of control English schools have over your own children's lives!!

When i requested day off for my then Year 6 child to attend my older sons graduation I was told this is best thing for my son to go and see and be part of the celebration and inspire to be like him. The head was very encouraging. Remember family always comes first. Enjoy it

I graduated in the 00s and 10s and my certificates were posted to me ahead of the ceremony, and to be honest it’s all I needed to prove I had graduated! I also refuse to add the letters after my name… it always reminds me of Rimmer from Red Dwarf who used the same prefix as a degree for his Bronze Swimming Certificate! There is the MA and chartership letters… but I find people who use them every day quite strange! Like they are trying to prove something!

My DH was forced by his parents to go to his graduation and was handed a tube wrapped in paper on stage, his actual certificate was also posted to him before the ceremony! I guess making him attend was more about them having a photo to boast about with their friends and family rather than recognising his achievement!

They have his graduation photo on display in their homes which DH always finds uncomfortable.

He feels like the whole thing was about his parents parading him like a prize pig to enhance their egos!

DS’s ceremony was only an hour (they fitted in 4 ceremonies in the day) but as he was one of the first up it did seem quite tedious by the end!

Thanks. (I've just realised that the pp did also get an actual certificate, but through the post.)

When I graduated, the ceremony was in Latin, and we were handed the tube containing the certificate after being bashed on the head with a mortar board. (Arts Faculty, Glasgow Uni). We only hired the cloak, no mortar board in those days.

We were told that only the first graduate got the full spiel in Latin - everyone else got 'et te' as we were bopped on the head - but Prof Duncan from Scottish History was doing the honours on the day that I graduated and, God bless the man, he made a point of giving each of us the full spiel...and the ceremony somehow didn't take any longer than it was supposed to.

How on earth is it hypocritical?

A child is not the same as a (much) older sibling.

A graduation of your own child is one of the very rare circumstances a teacher cannot be denied a paid day off. Seems utterly hypocritical to deny the same to a pupil.