AIBU to miss my sister's Moroccan wedding with an eight-week-old?

You might be hard pushed to get a passport in time, assuming you don't go overdue too. You need to register the baby, and I'm sure you'll remember you can't book the appointment until the baby is actually born. Our appointment was 4 weeks after birth and I was booking it from my hospital bed to get the earliest one. Then you've got to actually apply for the passport and hope it turns up in time.

Although that notwithstanding, I wouldn't be going anywhere abroad without those first 3 courses of vaccinations anyway.

I think you already know your answer then, wait until baby is born to decide. I would personally be speaking to my sister and explaining the situation. Most people would understand.

I voted YANBU because of my own experiences. I know myself I wouldn’t have been ready but I know other people take their newborns on flights so obviously people do it.

I would just wait and see what happens

You can only get married legally in Morocco if one of you is Moroccan. Therefore it is a purely symbolic ceremony and party, so say sorry you can't make it but you would be happy to attend their legal UK (presumably register office) ceremony.

I’m not sure I’d even want to take my toddler thinking about it. I wouldn’t go anywhere with my DCs that I wouldn’t be confident about having them in the healthcare facilities.

Every baby is so different. You may be lucky and get a brilliant sleeper this time around.

I was getting a good 8 or 9 hours at 8 weeks with my first. Definitely not the case with my second now 😢

You absolutely cannot commit to this, there are too many unknowns. Unless you are having a planned CS you can’t guarantee when the baby will arrive.

You then have to recover sort out a passport for the baby and vaccinations all in about 8 weeks.
You will be exposing the baby to a whole set of new germs different from the ones you may have passed on some immunity to. I am speaking from practical experience as DH is Algerian and we took the DC to visit from around 4-5 months and invariably they ended up with a cold or similar. It’s not a hygiene point, it’s just the local bacteria and viruses are different to the U.K.

Also what time of year is it and is it Marrakesh or on the coast? Somewhere like Marrakesh is going to be uncomfortable from around May-October with a newborn.

I flew 12 hours when my firstborn was 9 weeks. I had to have an emergency c-section with her and was in hospital for a week after birth. We did get the passport 3-4 days before departure but we couldn’t book flights until she was born as we had to know her date of birth upon booking and we obviously didn’t know that until she was born.

It wasn’t stressful and it was definitely worth it, but I didn’t have a toddler to deal with as well.

I think it’s a case of not being able to commit until after you give birth, if all is straight forward, is on or before due date, and breast feeding etc goes well plus you can get a passport in time then it’s ok, i travelled long haul at 7 weeks and it was fine. If you go overdue, need a c section or other complications it might not be possible

You need to think about all the possible outcomes and how happy you are with going under those circumstances.

For example, would you want to go potentially just 6 weeks after an emergency C-section with an unvaccinated baby and quite possibly still bleeding. Because that is a very real possibility.

Almost eradicated here maybe. But in Morocco?

I wouldn’t contemplate it. “Sorry sis, if you decide on a wedding inconvenient and expensive for everyone else (oops, meant to say destination wedding) then you must expect some people to be unable to attend. I’m sad to say that will include me this time.”

I would go if it was my sisters, I’m sure family will help out also whilst you are there

I'd wait and decide nearer the time.
You may have an easy birth and a dream baby which sleeps all the time, therefore a really lovely break away, or things could be very different...
Very young babies are very portable and it might all work out wonderfully, or it might not...

I'm sure your sister will understand that you are unable to commit either way yet!

I think it's too early to plan.

So either they are happy with you turning up or not at the very last minute, or you decline right now.

You might be ok to fly, you might not. Passport shouldn't be a problem but there's no way you can guess how well you will be.

I’m normally the first to not let a baby get in my way. But in this case, the thought of dealing with a toddler, a newborn, wedding stuff, a sick child, a sick baby, a sick parent, sleepless nights, looking like shit, potentially feeling like shit, having to secure a passport in time…any one of those would prevent me from enjoying it (maybe not the passport thing). When I had a 3yo and a newborn I could barely think straight until 12 weeks! The travel and hotel and getting vaccinations wouldn’t be any problem (unless formula feeding), it’s just things being hard enough as it is let alone adding this on top. Buggies, prams, nappies, slings, multiple clothes per day just for the baby let alone for a toddler - gah. I’m so glad this is behind me!

I would try and go, but I wouldn't commit yet, if that's an option. See when baby is born and if the timeline looks doable for passport and vaccines.

We just did a 10 hour flight with our toddler and 10 week old. I did want to get the baby their vaccines but their was a mix up and we just had to go anyway. It was all fine.

8 wk is not enough time to get all necessary vaccinations for Morocco.

I travelled with our youngest at 8 weeks old to a similar destination, couldn't have been easier as babe just mostly fed and slept....if no complications I think it would be fine....hard to know that in advance though!

Took my 7 week old and a toddler to Spain for a holiday and it was brilliant. The only thing that would concern me in your situation is the quality of healthcare available in Morocco. Other than that, I’d happily go provided everything goes well with the birth and recovery.

I don’t know why you wouldn’t

I took DD to Rome when she was 8 weeks old. We didn’t book it until after she was born and we knew everything was ok though. Marrakech seems a bit different though.

If the baby is late, then that’s 6 weeks to register the birth and then get the passport sorted, on top of everything else that comes along with having a newborn and a new child.
i wouldn’t want to miss my sisters wedding but this might be rather tricky.

We travelled to the USA with our ds when he was 3 months old for a family wedding. Getting the passport in time was tough and it was hard work travelling when we were so tired anyway. Babies are portable but add in a (much less portable) toddler and that your baby could be much younger than 8 weeks and I wouldn't.