Page 3 | Considering a holiday with a group half my age, where most are strangers.

Whathappend · 2026-09-20T13:19:46+00:00

I'm 50. I'm good friends with a 25 year old. I occasionally go out drinking and dancing with her and her friends. Last night we were out. They were talking about their loose plans to go to ibiza next summer. I was enthusiastic and told them i was excited for them. This turned into an invite for me to join them. I have wanted to go to ibiza my entire life. I love dance music and dancing until the early hours. But none of my friends in my life have ever wanted to join me on an ibiza holiday. And i don't want to go alone. So I'm seriously considering taking them up on their offer. However, they're half my age, so i won't be able to keep up. I've only met her friends a couple of times. They're nice enough, but not sure i want to go on holiday with near strangers. They've got less money than me, so I'll need to eat/sleep on their budgets. No nice meals out on holiday. And everything we do will be on their agenda and i won't feel i can interfere with that too much. But i really want to go to Ibiza! I'm a friendly person who gets on well with most. I can rough it for 4 days, and tell them I'm staying in if i need to rest. But still... AIBU considering going with a bunch of 25 year olds where i only know 1 of them?

Newname26 · 22/09/2026 07:41

VenusThighTrap · 22/09/2026 03:50

Clearly these young women aren’t as ageist as you are because they invited OP along.

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They invited on a whim when drunk.

If it was a completely mixed group, couple of 25 yos, and couple of 30 or 40 somethings plus Op it wouldn't be so weird.

You might find some of these girls start pulling out blaming money or whatever when they've sobered up and actually thought about how the dynamic will change having an old person with them.

Burtswasps · 22/09/2026 07:39

Sorry it’s a long thread - have you confirmed whether you have kids @Whathappend ?

Burtswasps · 22/09/2026 07:39

Whathappend · 22/09/2026 07:32

She's amazing.

I was drawn to her when i found out she'd set up a community group a few years back, as she saw a specific need amongst women her age in her locality. Aged 20.

The group is still thriving 5 years on.

She's always said she's got an older than it should be head on her shoulders.

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But it wasn’t your friend that invited you?

Original poster

Whathappend · 22/09/2026 07:32

thatsgotit · 22/09/2026 04:31

Sometimes friendship can transcend age, and not all of us pigeonhole other people by age. In that respect I think OP's friend is actually more mature than some posters on this thread.

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She's amazing.

I was drawn to her when i found out she'd set up a community group a few years back, as she saw a specific need amongst women her age in her locality. Aged 20.

The group is still thriving 5 years on.

She's always said she's got an older than it should be head on her shoulders.

OP posts:

Original poster

Whathappend · 22/09/2026 07:27

TRS20 · 22/09/2026 05:57

I’m a bit older than you and go to Ibiza hut I wouldn’t go with 25-year-olds, they don’t really want you there! Join the Facebook page Ibiza Clubbing for Over 40s. There is a group on there of singles your age who meet up for drinks and clubbing. Red Jules hosts it. Or go on your own! Loads of single older people go to Ibiza on their own ans have fun

Thanks for the name @TRS20 . I'd need to know a little about the people before i got there. Like i said, I've tried clubbing alone in the UK and it just isn't for me.

Extended holidays, cinema, restaurants, theatre alone, no problem, but clubbing solo isn't my bag.

OP posts:

Lookingdownthebarrell · 22/09/2026 06:37

How many days? Go and join them and have an experience! Nothing to lose here, aside from some money if you didn’t like it but wth! You always wanted to go and they seem like a nice young bunch.

In the corporate world there’s reverse mentoring concept, if nothing else you’ll find out what life it like for a younger females now. I was mentored by a 20something and he gave me insights into what motivates mid-20s and used it with some of my younger staff.

Ive become a pooper in my old age, I want to be more like you, so go and come back and tell us all about it please.

Burtswasps · 22/09/2026 06:30

HalzTangz · 22/09/2026 06:28

They have likely invited you out of politeness and are hoping you say no, they are young and young have a different style of fun to those in their 50s. Someone in your age group will feel to them a parent is on holiday with them
Consider going alone, or asking friends in your age group, you may find another that also wants to dance the night away

From what I can see there was no “they” in the invitation. It was a friend of the OP’s friend that extended the invitation

HalzTangz · 22/09/2026 06:28

They have likely invited you out of politeness and are hoping you say no, they are young and young have a different style of fun to those in their 50s. Someone in your age group will feel to them a parent is on holiday with them
Consider going alone, or asking friends in your age group, you may find another that also wants to dance the night away

Burtswasps · 22/09/2026 06:24

Do you have any kids @Whathappend ? If so, how old are they?

HPFA · 22/09/2026 06:08

Shinyhappyapple · 21/09/2026 17:52

@Whathappend
I think you need to bear in mind that many MNers’ default is to prefer to stay at home if they can, avoid socialising, never take chances and are always ready to end friendships over the smallest sleight. And you need to put any advice given in that context.

If it’s something you’ve always wanted to do,
then look at ways of making it happen. The Facebook group linked probably isn’t the only online group like this, so investigate. Keep an open mind with regard to the invitation from your friend’s friends. It may work if you are able to book your own accommodation and have a couple of groups to link into when you want to, so you may be happy to go sightseeing by yourself, but link up with a group for evening drinks and head to the club together.

I still haven't got over the Mumsnetters who say they don't answer the door, even in the daytime.

TRS20 · 22/09/2026 05:57

I’m a bit older than you and go to Ibiza hut I wouldn’t go with 25-year-olds, they don’t really want you there! Join the Facebook page Ibiza Clubbing for Over 40s. There is a group on there of singles your age who meet up for drinks and clubbing. Red Jules hosts it. Or go on your own! Loads of single older people go to Ibiza on their own ans have fun

maxslice · 22/09/2026 05:56

EvelynBeatrice · 21/09/2026 12:49

It seems to me a very peculiar aspect of British culture that differently aged people are not supposed to be friends with each other and on the rare occasions they are, they
must never socialise in public. Older people are expected to feel shame in the presence of younger people and to accept that enjoying their company and stereotypically ‘youthful’ activity is ‘sad’. How strange.

In my youth I had several older woman friends who I did go out with and was in no way unusual in doing so. Restricting yourself to partícular age bands risks losing out on so
much.

This. Absolutely, totally this. If not everyone in the group is your dear friend now, they may be after this trip together. Ignore ageist, ignorant people who limit their friendships to people who are only like themselves. They limit themselves, don’t let them limit you.

maxslice · 22/09/2026 05:50

Whathappend · 20/09/2026 16:17

It was one of her friends who said i should come, not my friend. The whole group then started to encourage me to go with them.

Maybe because i buy more rounds than they do. 🤣

None of my friends want to go @Surprisinglynice

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Sod them. Go and have a good time,

maxslice · 22/09/2026 05:48

morbidcuriosity · 20/09/2026 17:31

I say go for it, only live once and you want to go...

maybe book your own hotel and just meet them for a couple nights out, or go the whole way as you say, slum it for 4 nights... whats the worst that can happen, you need to stay in 1 night cos your tired..

who cares!!

Im team GO FOR IT!!!!

Me too.

maxslice · 22/09/2026 05:46

Shinyhappyapple · 21/09/2026 17:52

@Whathappend
I think you need to bear in mind that many MNers’ default is to prefer to stay at home if they can, avoid socialising, never take chances and are always ready to end friendships over the smallest sleight. And you need to put any advice given in that context.

If it’s something you’ve always wanted to do,
then look at ways of making it happen. The Facebook group linked probably isn’t the only online group like this, so investigate. Keep an open mind with regard to the invitation from your friend’s friends. It may work if you are able to book your own accommodation and have a couple of groups to link into when you want to, so you may be happy to go sightseeing by yourself, but link up with a group for evening drinks and head to the club together.

See, this a sane and reasonable response.

maxslice · 22/09/2026 05:44

Newname26 · 21/09/2026 14:32

Its not just what other people will think. Having Op there will change they group dynamics.

And there interactions with other groups of young people.

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So what? OP can participate at whatever level she wishes.

maxslice · 22/09/2026 05:42

How boring to only associate with people your own age.

maxslice · 22/09/2026 05:40

Do it. Absolutely do it. I have friends across generations and we enrich each other’s lives so much. Do it and have a great time.

thatsgotit · 22/09/2026 04:34

Papster · 22/09/2026 00:20

Depends if you want a week shagging 25 yo men

OP, if you decide not to go, I will. (Kidding 😂)

thatsgotit · 22/09/2026 04:31

PrettyLittleRose · 20/09/2026 17:27

Exactly. It's extremely odd, and smacks of wanting to 'get down with the kids' for a 50 year old to want to go on holiday with 25 year olds. I couldn't think of anything worse quite honestly! And when I was 25, I would NOT have wanted people in their 50s with me on my holiday with my friends. As has been said it sounds like they were just being polite, I doubt if they actually want the OP to go with them!

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Sometimes friendship can transcend age, and not all of us pigeonhole other people by age. In that respect I think OP's friend is actually more mature than some posters on this thread.

VenusThighTrap · 22/09/2026 03:50

Newname26 · 22/09/2026 00:18

Its not weird to have an age gap in a friendship but what is weird is going on holiday with friend & friends of friend who you don't really know who are young enough to be your kids.

If you were 25 going on holiday with your pals, would you really want someone's Auntie or Mum tagging along?
Because that's what it will feel like.

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Clearly these young women aren’t as ageist as you are because they invited OP along.

Changedforthread · 22/09/2026 01:24

I’ve travelled a lot - sometimes alone, sometimes with friends. Sometimes there’s a big age difference in either direction and it’s been absolutely fine. You’ve always wanted to go and here’s an opportunity. Maybe do a mix, so go do your own thing and go out with them a couple of nights. In parallel look at the fb group. Hope you get to go one way or another, with whomever you end up going with.

Papster · 22/09/2026 00:20

Depends if you want a week shagging 25 yo men

Newname26 · 22/09/2026 00:18

VenusThighTrap · 21/09/2026 23:41

I think you should go - but agree with the posters who say you should get your own accommodation and dip in and out of their activities.

I’m surprised at all the posters saying it’s weird to have an age gap in a friendship. Their lives must be very narrow!

One of my closest friends is 20 years older than me, we met 20ish years ago when I was 25. I would have missed an amazing friendship if I’d decided she was too old to be a mate!

Its not weird to have an age gap in a friendship but what is weird is going on holiday with friend & friends of friend who you don't really know who are young enough to be your kids.

If you were 25 going on holiday with your pals, would you really want someone's Auntie or Mum tagging along?
Because that's what it will feel like.

VenusThighTrap · 21/09/2026 23:41

I think you should go - but agree with the posters who say you should get your own accommodation and dip in and out of their activities.

I’m surprised at all the posters saying it’s weird to have an age gap in a friendship. Their lives must be very narrow!

One of my closest friends is 20 years older than me, we met 20ish years ago when I was 25. I would have missed an amazing friendship if I’d decided she was too old to be a mate!