To think my husband did not go too far and they should just get over it ?

He went too far

I think your DH made a fair comment. Your Aunt and Cousin are misogynistic twits who tried to put down your DH for being a good father. I wouldn't even be bothered about a fall out if they were my family. I'd rather not have my DC raised around such views.
I'm sure you'll have plenty of comments from people insecure about their own weight who feel he was awful, but if your family want to try and 'emasculate' him (I hate that term, but basically they're acting like he is less of a man for parenting) they should be ready to be put down for their faults. I might have took it even further if someone acted that way towards my DH and asked if they're into old fashioned gender roles, do they think it's a woman's job to take care of her looks and ensure she is not overweight. Eye for an eye and all that.
I'm absolutely baffled as to why they even acted that way. Surely they want their family member to be supported by her DH rather than her being left to do everything? Very, very odd.

Yeah its a real shame he couldn’t have kept his cool and held into the moral high ground.

They are clearly appalling with incredibly backward views and he was well within his rights to tell them to back off… but he chose to go down the route of personally insulting them.

Massive own goal and he probably should apologise.

I would be going no contact with these people though after that. You don’t have want people like this anywhere near your children.

He was agressive and extremely rude. I wouldn't want to have anything to do with such a person.

They were rude, but their rudeness was absolutely nothing to do with their weight - so why did he bring it up if not to be nasty and spiteful?

If he’d snapped and said, “Oh, fuck off, Gertrude, it’s absolutely none of your business,” I’d probably applaud. But he brought her weight into it when that had absolutely nothing to do with the topic, and it’s telling that that’s where his mind went.

I've often wondered why "Be Kind" is aimed at women?

Hmmmmmmmm...

What have you done about their behaviour?

I remember the first time we visited my parents with baby DC. My Nan also visited that day. We had been travelling for a couple of hours so as soon as we arrived DH took DC to change nappy. My Nan asked me whether I was ill as it wasn’t DH’s job to do that! I soon put them all straight that DH was perfectly capable of changing a nappy and apart from feeding DC (as breastfeeding) he could do everything I could with a baby

Nah, I’m with your husband. If she can give, then she can take.

She was also going after something personal (ie how you choose to parent as a family) so I’m not sure why mentioning her weight is some mortal sin. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

He did nothing wrong. They were extremely rude so he gave them some of their own medicine. They will think before they speak next time.

So then don’t go round there if neither of them are capable of dealing with the comments or formulating an articulate response.

poor kids.

Why should Op and her DH have to spend their time educating grown women on this matter? What part of it was positive to begin with?… their sexism, their rudeness, them making comments criticising OP and her DH marriage and parenting?

I really dont think he did anything wrong. He is simply being a father and parenting his children, as all fathers should. These women had no place having a go at about something that has nothing to do with them, so he threw one back at them.

Good for your husband. One of you should have said something alot sooner.

Both of them were rude but I can see how your DH snapped. This sounds like a long term annoyance for him, ever since your first DS was born, and he probably thought FFS we've all come over in a sleep deprived fog with 2 kids and now I'm just being insulted. When I was horrifically exhausted with my newborns I really didn't have much of a fuse either.

Aunt should apologise first then your DH should too. Or just leave it, sounds very unlikely they'll agree to be in the same room together again.

Two wrongs don’t make a right.

As much as the sexist comments were not ok. I could not be married ro such a pig of a man who insulted a woman’s body as he couldn’t articulate a way to stop the conversation.

im afraid I’d assume this was some low life low intelligent male.

They wouldn’t be getting an apology from me and I wouldn’t expect dh to apologise either. Four years of judgy comments about your parenting, home, family… game over and I wouldn’t care too much about not seeing them again. Of course it would have been better if DH had retained the high ground of just telling her to button it, but it is what it is.

I cannot imagine a world where my husband would swear at a family member of mine. That to me is the issue here. I’m quite old fashioned and outdated and would find it hard to understand a man taking 6 months paternity leave. But I appreciate I live in a different world to most and that my opinion isn’t everyone’s. However, I would hope my family wouldn’t swear at me about my opinions! I also how would never criticize them openly. Maybe a gentle jest if we got on that well. Maybe a gentle jest back about weight. But swearing to me is aggressive and unnecessary

Why are you making excuses for his behaviour? And also, is there a reason why you mentioned their ages?
Im afraid I wouldn’t want to be with a man who speaks so nastily to women in the presence of my children. There were other ways that he could have dealt with their comments.

Your aunt and cousin goaded him. I would have snapped too in his position.

You all sound throughly unlikeable

They don't care what he thinks. She cares more about her ego than your & DH's feelings, as repeatedly demonstrated over the years.

I agree he shouldn't have made the personal insult, but I'm assuming the pair of you have tried more measured approaches to her! This worked, so it's a win. an ugly one, but a win nonetheless.