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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU? Will I get arrested

223 replies

mumlearningtorun · 20/09/2026 05:39

I’ve just come home from a girls night in London and it was so fun… we left the bar we was in and spent £1000 on brunch in and when we came back the security wouldn’t let us back in. Even though you could book a reservation online.

I was a bit frustrated and said but we’ve spent money in here all day and went to enjoy the rest of our day and spend more? Someone went to check and then another bouncer came out all angry ‘NO REENTRY’ and I asked about 6 times to speak to a manager, which I was told ‘no’ I probably got a bit annoyed but I never was violent or used any threats.

as I walked away I said ‘we’ll spend our money elsewhere then’ and that one bouncer said ‘yeh do!’

my friend went back and felt the need to apologise and the bouncers went ‘don’t worry it’s just him’ and she said she looked at his phone and it said ‘White female, aggressive, police called’

sorry? I wasn’t aggressive, anyway my friend managed to rebook a table in there to prove a point and we went back 30
minutes later and they let us in and we had a great time.

I’ve been up all night, I suffer with anxiety anyway and the police called bit is playing on my mind- my friend told me stop being silly and stop worrying as I’ve done nothing wrong.

but me being me, I’m ofc worrying!

OP posts:
MrsVBS · 20/09/2026 20:25

If that was all that happened and you didn’t do something dreadful that you’ve omitted then I’m fairly sure the police have got better things to investigate than you asking six times to be readmitted to a brunch.

mumlearningtorun · 20/09/2026 20:20

Well I’ve not heard anything today

OP posts:
SayWhatty · 20/09/2026 19:12

mumlearningtorun · 20/09/2026 06:07

I agree, but my mind is telling me they may arrest me in a few days

For what? Don't be silly.
It's hard enough to get the police involved when an actual crime has been committed.

NotAnotherScarf · 20/09/2026 15:03

As someone who has been arrested on a number of occasions. You would have been nicked there and then...if the coppers managed to stop laughing at the bouncer for having to call them for one woman asking for the manager!

How are they going to nick you know? Go through the CCTV, credit card receipts? And why would they nick you if they did waste the time doing it? What offence...drunk and disorderly... They can't prove you were drunk now.

nrp2 · 20/09/2026 14:24

Where you the only white female in the entire bar for the entirety of the night? If not then the note probably isn't even about you.

Alwaysbella · 20/09/2026 13:52

@bettyrubble99 your husband was attacked and needed 8 stitches to the head. Surely he reported this to the police?

Dweetfidilove · 20/09/2026 13:50

bettyrubble99 · 20/09/2026 06:28

My husband is security guard and a door supervisor on a weekend. He would never have got the police involved for such a small matter.
At Pride weekend a few years ago, he got battered round the head with a high heel after a lady was been rude to to act on stage and wouldn't leave when asked. A co worker had to escort her out & she went nuts when my husband said she couldn't come back in. He needed 8 stitches.
Don't worry about it. The police have far more pressing matters happening on a Saturday night to deal with x

Edited

Your poor husband.
Was she arrested. I hope she isn't allowed to just walk away from that 😕.

Alwaysbella · 20/09/2026 13:41

Sidebeforeself · 20/09/2026 13:37

OP has told us that - 15

Oh I feel for the waiting staff and other diners. The noise!

Sidebeforeself · 20/09/2026 13:37

Alwaysbella · 20/09/2026 13:29

How many were in the group for brunch 1-3pm to total £1000???

OP has told us that - 15

Alwaysbella · 20/09/2026 13:29

How many were in the group for brunch 1-3pm to total £1000???

TorroFerney · 20/09/2026 12:37

MyLimeGuide · 20/09/2026 08:40

Because she's a hater. Ignore OP

Hater of what? What does that mean?

watchingthishtread · 20/09/2026 12:32

You're not going to be arrested but as a group you sound like a complete nightmare to deal with.

BreatheAndFocus · 20/09/2026 11:59

mumlearningtorun · 20/09/2026 07:22

I just want to know if it’s likely 😭

Why? You won’t listen to anyone who tells you that, so what’s the point? Your anxiety is taking over. The more people tell you it will be fine, the more you’re working yourself up.

Do you seriously think the bouncer or police care about you being a bit mouthy?

shihtzuu · 20/09/2026 11:45

Omg you've done nothing wrong and the police won't care. I would say he probably does remember you and probably won't let you back in. Some bouncers are on a power trip, I used to work at a club and the front door staff behaviour towards students was quite sickening.

Lairymary · 20/09/2026 11:24

Let's look at it this way..... if they felt the need to call the police on you, they most definitely wouldn't have allowed you re entry later on, booking or not. Not sure why you would want to go back though, should have "spent your money " at another establishment if you had an unpleasant interaction with them already. Lay off the booze if you can't handle it. I suspect you were more mouthy and obnoxious than you remember.

KilkennyCats · 20/09/2026 11:23

mumlearningtorun · 20/09/2026 06:19

That’s why I’m like ‘did I have a black out and do something bad’ because I agree, I wouldn’t have even thought about it if my friend hadn’t mentioned because yeh, OTT. Now my mind is playing on it. My friends said I done nothing wrong, one of them in the group chat said ‘what are they going to arrest you for? Wanting to spend your money in a bar and asking for a manager when they said no’

Going forward, stop drinking to the point where you’re seriously questioning whether you could have had a blackout and done things you can’t remember.

zingally · 20/09/2026 11:21

You're not going to get arrested days after the fact for being a bit mouthy to a security guard.
Being a bit rude isn't a crime. The onus would be on the security guard to prove that you committed a crime, either with CCTV or with actual physical injury.

And for what it's worth, there's no proof that note on his phone was about you. Plus, how "up in his business" did your friend have to be to even see that?!

CalishataFolkart · 20/09/2026 11:16

mumlearningtorun · 20/09/2026 07:22

I just want to know if it’s likely 😭

No it isn’t likely.

Try and think of it like this - you saw the bouncer go over to the police van. The note he made didn’t mean he had “called” the police, it meant he had “informed” them that there was someone he felt was being aggressive and could potentially escalate, so it was worth noting and keeping an eye on them.

You didn’t escalate so no further action was needed.

TheFlyingPenguin · 20/09/2026 11:15

Honestly - if a bouncer cannot handle a boozy, slightly gobby woman trying to get in without calling the police he is in the wrong job. Police probably looked at that and fell off their chair laughing and went back to their day job.

sweetpickle2 · 20/09/2026 11:14

PollyBell · 20/09/2026 11:05

Having a few drinks is normal being neurotic isn't

And it’s not possible to anxious and neurotic unless you’ve taken cocaine?

PollyBell · 20/09/2026 11:05

sweetpickle2 · 20/09/2026 10:51

No thank you, I just had some.

Seriously why do people always jump to this on any thread about someone having a few drinks, do you not get out much?

Having a few drinks is normal being neurotic isn't

Uricon2 · 20/09/2026 11:00

I think "Do not argue with the bouncers" is a reasonable universal life rule, TBH.

StarPyjamas · 20/09/2026 10:58

I think it's more about wanting attention than 'beer fear'.

Sidebeforeself · 20/09/2026 10:56

I cant understand why you wanted to go back in especially after the encounter.Admit it..you were all pissed,some of you were gobby and now you’ve got The Beer Fear

sweetpickle2 · 20/09/2026 10:51

AFigureWalks · 20/09/2026 09:41

Cocaine?

No thank you, I just had some.

Seriously why do people always jump to this on any thread about someone having a few drinks, do you not get out much?