Partner kicked off at birthday gift

by the way he’s a grown 50 year old

He’s a twat but was it his 50th?

A man who calls you a bitch isn’t a man you want in your life. Especially not at 50 - I’m that age and there was still some vestige of gentlemanliness in our upbringing at that time.

What a silly twat!

He sounds like he has lots of issues.
Its ok not to like presents etc. but this is odd. Like he is saying one thing but expecting you to do it anyway to show him love. This inner conflict could be something like borderline personality disorder.

Have you noticed any signs of weird behaviour?

Absolutely pathetic. Good riddance to him, what a knob.

What an abusive bastard.
what do you mean he “fetches” your son ?
you can’t let your baby go to stay in an empty unfurnished house with a mentally unstable man who weeps because his birthday presents weren’t what he thought they should be ?!

My DP is also in the ‘there is nothing I want/need’ brigade so I usually buy a token gift and treat him to a day/weekend out and he’s always over the moon with it! He’d be chuffed with £100 voucher and a meal, unless you’re going to reveal you’re one of the mega earners on MN I’d say he was a major dickhead and waiting for any excuse to bail

Let this be the wake up call you need. Dump him and do not let him come back

For real? Is he having some sort of crisis or being a major bitch?
Why would you want him back.
I would of laughed.

It’s fine to be upset if you think there is a lack of thought and effort around your special day but kicking off and leaving?!?!

Imagine how many marriages would end if women did this when their shitty husbands do literally NOTHING for their birthdays/Xmas/Mothers day etc!

I would be interested to see how he is justifying this though, "I left her because she bought me a present that I didnt like for my birthday so it proves she doesnt care and I should leave"

That is an insane reaction from him. He didn't want a bloody present anyway did he? I would not want him to come home again after that show.

Please tell me you’ve packed his stuff and locked the door.

The fact that “tight bitch” came out of his mouth so easily suggests he has said stuff like this before? No one should call you a bitch.

Urgh I hate people who set you up to fail.

The people who say they dont want anything and then kick off when you dont get them anything. The people who say "Oh anything, I dont mind!" and then kick off when you haven't read their mind.

I agree with others that there is something else going on here, alongside him being a complete fucking arsehole.

You are 34, plenty of time to find a good man not an insecure mid life crisis on legs.

Anyone who behaves this way when they are in a serious relationship with a young child is a total loser. It’s fine to be upset if you think there is a lack of thought and effort around your special day but kicking off and leaving?!?!

It sounds like an excuse to me. He wanted out but wanted it to be your fault so no one would think badly of him. I’d put in a claim for cms and organise access to your child. Do it through a parenting app so that you can block him on all other firms of communication. Then only communicate about your child.

I'm sorry this happened to you.

He said he didn't want anything

He said there was nothing specific he wanted but he'd be grateful for anything he got her. Now clearly he didn't mean it. But I have a different take on this. My reaction is that there's something in his past that's created this response. OP says he's the same about Christmas.

Some thoughts...

He got crap presents (or no presents) as a child - possibly while siblings got much better gifts.

Presents were used for control - 'you're not getting anything for your birthday because you're a bad child' or the presents were given then taken away for not being good.

Any money he got for birthdays/Christmas he was forced to hand over.

Any presents he got he had to give to, or share with, siblings. He never got anything that was just his.

It may be none of these, there may be something else. I give them as examples of the sort of thing that possibly went on.

Of course yes he may just be a miserable git. But try to dig a bit before you give up on him.

What a deeply ridiculous embarrasement of a man. All that fuss pre birthday as in "don't get me anything" then the high drama and nastiness when he does get a very acceptable gift and the thoughtful extras. Crying is pathetic, and calling the OP a "tight bitch" is unforgivable.

Oh thank goodness he has gone.

But what about where you live, is it rented or bought
and in whose name ?

He can pay CMS towards his child.

I could have guessed you were a good bit younger than him, he appears to feel like he can throw his toys out of the pram with you. When someone shows you who they are believe them, if you stay with him then its really really likely this behaviour will happen again, find someone who doesn't call you a bitch.

I'd have to dump him out of sheer embarrassment of him crying like a little spoilt boy

You’re dating a child. Oh dear

Change the locks ..

For fucks sake. Dont take him back. Id be thrilled with £100 clothes voucher.

Your child would behave better. Oh God, he's a baby man. Bye bye.

Why are so many people trying to puzzle it out or make it make sense?

This is literal ZERO TOLERANCE behaviour..there are no excuse at all for behaving that way.

OP do not let this be a pattern. Accept his actions ..he left. You deserve SO much better. This is deep seated behaviour to even use that word toward a loved one makes him a lost cause.

Your son deserves at least 50% secure and safe home life