Stressful incident on motorway, scared

flashing is like slang when it comes to driving, here it is to let someone in
Beeping for them not seeing you, not moving at a green light, being an arse etc

Flashing lights can only legally mean “I’m here”. Not “there you go”, “come through” or “speed trap ahead”.

They should have flashed you in really if they were doing it that way

It is always possible. You judge their speed, and either slow down to slot into behind them, or speed up to slot in in front.

@Nooooope

“I got to the end of the slip road and the car in the left lane didn’t slow down enough”

You shouldn’t be relying on cars to let you in. It’s entirely your responsibility to join safely, adjusting your speed as necessary to slot into a gap.

The problems come when you get ‘niceholes’ who slow down to let you in. This can cause danger and confusion, where one person is following the Highway Code and another is making up their own rules.

I had this a few weeks ago. Joining a motorway and car on inside lane. I slowed down intending to slot into a big gap behind the car. They started slowing down too to let me me in, and they ended up coming to a virtual stop on the motorway. They then proceeded to angrily honk their horn and flash their lights at me. WTF? They were the ones that nearly caused a pile up by slowing down so much. If they had carried on at a steady speed then I would have safely slotted in behind them - as per the Highway code.

Because they think the left hand lane is the slow one and therefore they think they must be in one of the overtaking lanes. Usually the 3rd one of a 4 lane motorway. Don't get me started on that section of the M5....
Also they usually don't pull in after they've been overtaken. How do those people ever pull off?

They mean the people who think there is a “slow lane” tend to be the ones that sit in the middle “not fast or slow” lane.

I had an issue happen to me once - I matched the speed of two cars with a decent gap (probably doing about 60) and the car at the back of the gap sped up to close it. Knob. I had to slow down and slot in behind.

No, that's overtaking. Middle lane hogging is driving in the middle lane while lane 1 is empty.

What do you mean? When I come across middle lane hoggers, (normally when I have to go around them then back to lane one after passing them), there is absolutely nothing in lane one.

One more piece of advice, both for the motorway and the slip road - try and always keep a decent gap in front of you. This just gives more time for dealing with things and makes everything a bit safer. If someone moves into the space, just gradually drop back at little.

OP I just wanted to say try not to worry yourself too much - slip roads can take a bit of getting used to but they almost always work out fine.

I think you just had bad luck with the car in front slowing down (and the trailer today!).

Although it was scary, you dealt with the situation (as did the driver already on the motorway even if he was grumpy about it) and you managed to merge safely.

Ignore the posters on here who are like "OMG so dangerous, everyone should be able to drive perfectly in all situations from day 1 of driving". You clearly weren't being reckless, you're just a relatively new driver dealing with a tricky situation. I think motorway driving is a lot less stressful than city driving once you've had a bit of practice. So don't let it put you off. Good luck

Middle lane hogging is generally due to the 'slow lane' thickos

I've often thought I'd hate to actually stop on the slip lane after not being able to merge on properly, as I'd hate to have to accelerate from 0 to 70mph in the space of a few seconds..!😫😬😳 Thankfully in all my years driving, I have never had to do this!

Yep, because that is a safe speed for them to avoid sudden braking and potential snaking because of it. Again, you need to adapt to what's around you.

@Nooooope well done, and you'll keep getting better at handling challenging or less than ideal situations.

There is no “slow lane” and 70 in lane 1 is perfectly acceptable.

This is not always possible if the motorway is busy.

"Basic motorway common sense requires drivers already on the road to be aware at sliproads and adjust to merging traffic, if you can move/speed up or slow down, do so"

Basic common sense would be to follow the highway code and realise that merging safely is the responsibility of the merging driver.

As evidenced by the thread too many people are unaware of basic driving rules.

If the motorway is quiet or traffic is busy and slow then yes people adjust speed or move over but this is a courtesy not an entitlement, and moving over a lane is not always possible. so many people failing to accelerate properly to match the speed of established traffic because they seem to expect established traffic to facilitate their merging.

If you are trying to merge drivers on the motorway changing speed can make it harder to do so. The joining driver may decide to slow slightly to merge into a gap behind a car in lane 1 who then also decides to slow as a courtesy so the gap disappears.

I've been behind cars on a slip road who slowed to a near stop in this situation.

A slip road is basically a junction. You should be matching your speed to slip into the stream of traffic but if you can't, then you may have to brake or stop altogether when in rush hour.
Do you have P plates on? May make others more forgiving or give you a wider berth?
I did pass plus after I'd passed my driving test and that helped a lot. Also having a black box fitted still counts on my Admiral insurance more than a decade later.

Edited to say the black box was only in the car for the first year. (while you are still driving more carefully)

I didn’t reply to you.

What if you can't? Vehicles behind, vehicles in lane 2.

We drive a slow vehicle, we're usually found pootling along with the trucks in lane 1 - they of course are limited to 56mph. We had someone drive at us in exactly this way very recently. We could do nothing, we can't physically speed up, we had a truck close behind us and traffic outside of us in lane 2, yet presumably the same as many posters on this thread, the joining vehicle expected us to magic ourselves out of the way. There was a gap in front of us, we always sit back from the vehicle ahead - the joining vehicle needed to speed up and join safely ahead of us rather than driving at us.

There isn't really anything for debate. As has been said in many posts - it is for the joining vehicle to join safely into a gap. Vehicles on the major road (MWay or dual carriageway) may be able to move over or adjust their speed safely to assist the joining vehicle but it isn't their responsibility.

Or you could move over and let them in?

Now I know why those merging are seemingly intent on crashing into the side of me.