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Would you do any of these hypothetical things for 1 billion pounds?

166 replies

Gettingcosy13 · 18/09/2026 17:32

Just for fun and because I was talking to a friend earlier and we were having a ridiculous conversation.

Would you do any of these 3 things for a guaranteed instant billion pounds.

Have sex with 1000 men (you won’t catch an std)
Kill someone (you won’t get caught)
Have sex with the most repulsive man you can think of.
Put your children in boarding school.

Obviously those things aren’t really going to happened but if someone offered you the money to do one of those things would you do any and if so which one?

OP posts:
Whatawickedgametochoose · 18/09/2026 18:43

No boarding, not parting with the DC. No sex, just yuck. The killing is fine if I won’t get caught.

Greenandyellowday · 18/09/2026 18:42

Boarding school, easy peasy. I went myself. It was mostly okay: good education, sports, a lot of laughs. My DSs went to public school too.

The 2 sex things, heck no. Can hardly be bothered to shave my legs, let alone the regions that are presumably expected for a career in bonking. Plus I'm nearly 60 😂My hips don't lie... and they say "Ow! Are you serious?" I don't even want to think about the most repulsive man I can imagine... upchuck.

Killing someone: that would depend on the weapon provided.

Grumpyoldcat · 18/09/2026 18:42

If we can choose one Id go for the boarding school.

Gothwife · 18/09/2026 18:42

I’d do everything except put my kids in boarding school, unless I could just do it for 1 night and take them straight out again.

Backlate · 18/09/2026 18:42

Gettingcosy13 · 18/09/2026 18:41

Interesting how many people are naming Trump as the repulsive man. That’s really tickled me

You don’t think he’s repulsive???

Gettingcosy13 · 18/09/2026 18:41

Interesting how many people are naming Trump as the repulsive man. That’s really tickled me

OP posts:
11AndCounting · 18/09/2026 18:41

Sounds like a lot of fun, but I don't have the billion pounds to spend.

Gettingcosy13 · 18/09/2026 18:40

ShutupLwren · 18/09/2026 18:34

I presumed the 1000 men was a Bonnie blue style stunt.
Honestly I’d rather that than have the fuckers wading in and out my life. Get it sorted in 24 hours.

Shagging trump for a billion? If I wasn’t aware of how he’s a child predatory rapist who’s responsible for deaths of 1000s of civilians and I just thought he was a gross shitty arsed loser, fine. But not knowing who he is as a person. I couldn’t.

I’d rather have sex with one of the contestants from my 1000lb life where they haven’t washed for 10 years and smell like poo than trump.

Yes well that was what started the conversation but didn’t want to start a Bonnie Blue thread so that’s why I didn’t mention her. But yes that was along the lines I was thinking.

1000 std checked randoms as quickly as possible or one definitely repulsive man.

I guess the boarding school I know now my child would hate it so it probably doesn’t apply to those whose children want to go.

OP posts:
JudyTeeny · 18/09/2026 18:40

We used to do this in idle moments at work, but it was a million, rather than a billion. That's inflation for you!

SpottyAlpaca · 18/09/2026 18:39

Have sex with 1000 men (you won’t catch an std) - Yes, and I would do it for a lot less than £1bn.
Kill someone (you won’t get caught) - Depends who. If I can choose the victim (Trump) then yes.
Have sex with the most repulsive man you can think of. - Yes, of course (Trump again).
Put your children in boarding school. - I haven’t got children, but if I had, yes I would.

MidnightMeltdown · 18/09/2026 18:36

See ya kids! Off to boarding school! 😂

FionnulaTheCooler · 18/09/2026 18:35

I've already threatened my teenager with boarding school when she's doing my head in but realistically it's out of my budget so I guess that one.

Strawberryfruitstarburst · 18/09/2026 18:35

GarlicSomething · 18/09/2026 18:13

All except kill. I'm somewhat disturbed by the number of PPs who'd rather be a murderer than shag an ugly!

I'd need to space the 1,000 men out over, say, three months. I could do the disgusting man doggy-style so I didn't have to look at him 😂

It’s because there are some mega evil people in this world who deserve to be put down BUT the most repulsive man could be one of those people…

ShutupLwren · 18/09/2026 18:34

I presumed the 1000 men was a Bonnie blue style stunt.
Honestly I’d rather that than have the fuckers wading in and out my life. Get it sorted in 24 hours.

Shagging trump for a billion? If I wasn’t aware of how he’s a child predatory rapist who’s responsible for deaths of 1000s of civilians and I just thought he was a gross shitty arsed loser, fine. But not knowing who he is as a person. I couldn’t.

I’d rather have sex with one of the contestants from my 1000lb life where they haven’t washed for 10 years and smell like poo than trump.

AllJoyAndNoFun · 18/09/2026 18:34

Any of them tbh. But you might have a job finding 1000 willing men 😂

Strawberryfruitstarburst · 18/09/2026 18:33

I’d have sex with 1000 men but not in a day I’d need time 😂

I’d kill an evil person.

Not sure about the repulsive man but I wouldn’t rule it out.

Id never put my child in boarding school it would break his gorgeous little heart.

Backlate · 18/09/2026 18:33

Sparrowlass · 18/09/2026 18:33

Yes, I could. I would use the billion to help vulnerable members of our society (including non-humans) and I could cope with that for a few minutes. I have had many a disgusting/abusive sexual encounter unfortunately and I am not traumatised by those incidents, annoyed and aggrieved at most (and I do have trauma from other things, I know how my brain works). So yes, I could do that. As long as he hasn't got any STIs and I could get straight in the shower following. Do I get 2 billion if I kill him afterwards?

How do you know it would be for a few minutes?

Sparrowlass · 18/09/2026 18:33

SukiPook · 18/09/2026 18:19

For those saying they'd shag the repulsive man....
He's Donald Trump. He's got bad breath and just filled his nappy and wants to talk dirty to you ...
Still think you'd be able to go through with it? It's gotta be someone you're actually repulsed by.... it could give you ptsd!

So the 1000 guys , like a previous poster I am wondering what is the timescale.... as logistically this one would be quite difficult. I'm also assuming that these men are going to be attractive? If they're attractive and I get to meet 1 a day... nah that's going to take nearly 3 years. Ok, 2 a day.... take Sundays off, lol... still sounds exhausting though. I'd need an advance on some of the money, to give me the motivation....

Definitely wouldn't kill someone for money! And wouldn't put my child in boarding school, especially as she's only 6. It could be the best school in the country and I'd be thinking of the start of Jane Eyre. Plus the higher risk of sexual abuse of a child staying away from home. No way!

How drunk are you allowed to get to sleep with the repulsive guy? Can I rohypnol myself? At the very least some gas and air?!

Not sure if in reality I would do any of them but if I had to pick one it's going to be between the 2 sex ones... I definitely would shave my head for 50 grand though.

Yes, I could. I would use the billion to help vulnerable members of our society (including non-humans) and I could cope with that for a few minutes. I have had many a disgusting/abusive sexual encounter unfortunately and I am not traumatised by those incidents, annoyed and aggrieved at most (and I do have trauma from other things, I know how my brain works). So yes, I could do that. As long as he hasn't got any STIs and I could get straight in the shower following. Do I get 2 billion if I kill him afterwards?

drspouse · 18/09/2026 18:33

My DS may have to go to boarding school if we can't find one suitable near enough.
DD is keen to try boarding (she's a day pupil in a state boarding school) so we may let her do weekly boarding towards the end of secondary school.
So I'll have my billion pounds please.

Orangemintcream · 18/09/2026 18:32

I would happily kill someone of my choice 100x over rather than have sex with Donald Trump.

Frequency · 18/09/2026 18:31

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40notouttoday · 18/09/2026 18:27

How long does the sex last...

Hiredgun · 18/09/2026 18:26

Gettingcosy13 · 18/09/2026 17:32

Just for fun and because I was talking to a friend earlier and we were having a ridiculous conversation.

Would you do any of these 3 things for a guaranteed instant billion pounds.

Have sex with 1000 men (you won’t catch an std)
Kill someone (you won’t get caught)
Have sex with the most repulsive man you can think of.
Put your children in boarding school.

Obviously those things aren’t really going to happened but if someone offered you the money to do one of those things would you do any and if so which one?

Some people have done these things for pocket change or for free.

Gettingcosy13 · 18/09/2026 18:24

SukiPook · 18/09/2026 18:19

For those saying they'd shag the repulsive man....
He's Donald Trump. He's got bad breath and just filled his nappy and wants to talk dirty to you ...
Still think you'd be able to go through with it? It's gotta be someone you're actually repulsed by.... it could give you ptsd!

So the 1000 guys , like a previous poster I am wondering what is the timescale.... as logistically this one would be quite difficult. I'm also assuming that these men are going to be attractive? If they're attractive and I get to meet 1 a day... nah that's going to take nearly 3 years. Ok, 2 a day.... take Sundays off, lol... still sounds exhausting though. I'd need an advance on some of the money, to give me the motivation....

Definitely wouldn't kill someone for money! And wouldn't put my child in boarding school, especially as she's only 6. It could be the best school in the country and I'd be thinking of the start of Jane Eyre. Plus the higher risk of sexual abuse of a child staying away from home. No way!

How drunk are you allowed to get to sleep with the repulsive guy? Can I rohypnol myself? At the very least some gas and air?!

Not sure if in reality I would do any of them but if I had to pick one it's going to be between the 2 sex ones... I definitely would shave my head for 50 grand though.

I wasn’t thinking he would shit himself 🤣

But still I could buy the best therapy with my millions.

If it was the thousand men I think I’d rather get it over with than stretch it out over years.

OP posts:
fivetriangulartrees · 18/09/2026 18:24

Cor, imagine if you opted for the 1000 men thing and it turned out to be the most repulsive man you can think of and his 999 brothers.

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