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AIBU?

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Original poster

Bank worker has just lectured me on my spending

236 replies

kissfromaroses · 17/09/2026 17:15

I have been saving for a big shopping day for a while now. I’ve realised I hate going out to the shops so have instead done it online.

I transferred the savings into my spending account this morning and through the day have ordered bits and bobs. I tried to order something this afternoon and the card got blocked.

No worries, I call them to clarify.

The worker went far beyond fraud protection, in my eyes. She told me I was irresponsibly spending, I need to be careful as it looks like money laundering, and I’m now a red flag to lenders!

I didn’t ask for any of this. I’ve saved for six months to spend about £1,200. AIBU to consider a complaint?!

OP posts:
Bigbumbigtum · 17/09/2026 17:51

PuppyMonkey · 17/09/2026 17:43

I’ve seen a few posts on social media recently where Santander were refusing to let people withdraw money from their account without having proof (eg a bill) of what the person intended to spend the money on. Confused

If people dont want to be asked for this they should keep their money under their mattress. If the bank give them the money regardless, who will the customer be blaming and expecting the money back from if they are being scammed? The bank. Better a few extra checks than losing out to a scam. If its nothing untoward customers shouldnt have an issue with providing proof. People are sometimes just too stubborn and think the big bad banks are out to get them.

MistressoftheDarkSide · 17/09/2026 17:50

Interesting.

Just wait until we end up with CDBC and "social credit" type monitoring.....

Pearlstillsinging · 17/09/2026 17:50

ZombieZebra · 17/09/2026 17:41

£1200 isn’t even that much really. The only time our card has ever been blocked was when I was using it in France, which was annoying as I’d registered it for use on the NatWest site prior to our trip. Took ages to sort that out.

I had a similar experience with NatWest when I was a student in Paris!

INeverReallyLovedYouAnyway · 17/09/2026 17:50

You saved £1200 for a shopping day and spent it online??

Worst. Shopping Day. Ever.

Original poster
kissfromaroses · 17/09/2026 17:48

Elieza · 17/09/2026 17:40

i can only imagine she said that spending like that can look like irresponsible spending to a lender who could red flag you?

which is almost the same as what you thought theyd said but isn’t.

how much debt have you got in your other accounts?

why do they care what you look like to lenders?
are you going for a mortgage soon or something?

No debt. I have no idea. I’m not applying for a mortgage.

OP posts:
Original poster
kissfromaroses · 17/09/2026 17:48

LavenderDisco · 17/09/2026 17:47

Was the lecture intended to be education on how not to look like a criminal in the future? Was it factual? And was it her tone/manner that you found rude/ patronising/ condescending rather than the content?

Or was the nature of the lecture only a judgment of how you choose to spend your own money?

Show quote history

It was a bit of all of it.

I don’t think I looked criminal. I’m spending my hard earned money. I understand why there are fraud flags, but that wouldn’t be me being a criminal.

Her tone was awful. Like she was speaking to a child.

OP posts:
Soontobe60 · 17/09/2026 17:47

jay55 · 17/09/2026 17:39

It’s against money laundering regulations to tip off a customer that they are suspected of money laundering

Well luckily that’s not what happened here - explaining why a card may have been stopped when a customer phones to ask is not the same as a bank assistant phoning a customer and tipping them off.

LavenderDisco · 17/09/2026 17:47

kissfromaroses · 17/09/2026 17:26

And as I’ve said I completely agree that they have anti fraud duties. I’m not bothered by that. It’s the lecture that annoyed me

Show quote history

Was the lecture intended to be education on how not to look like a criminal in the future? Was it factual? And was it her tone/manner that you found rude/ patronising/ condescending rather than the content?

Or was the nature of the lecture only a judgment of how you choose to spend your own money?

Bloodysquirellls · 17/09/2026 17:45

I had a similar incident. Opened a monzo account and never looked back. No issues since

Trickedbyadoughnut · 17/09/2026 17:45

This is what a lot of the banks are like in France and they absolutely go through your spending with a fine-tooth comb when you try to get a mortgage! We have started getting cash out again so we are not getting judged for our takeaway pizza habit.

Fingeronthebutton · 17/09/2026 17:44

LavenderDisco · 17/09/2026 17:25

Well it sounds like an unusual spending pattern for your account. Banks have responsibilities to notice and investigate unusual spending which could be fraud, money laundering, financial coercion etc. Having investigated by speaking to you they should have been able to either set their record straight or if they had any concerns about your explanation, either pursue it now or keep an eye on your account for further odd activity. The person told you how to avoid being flagged in the future. The "irresponsible spending" comment is the only thing in your OP that oversteps into plain rudeness. That's a personal opinion and a judgement. If you're going to complain, I'd focus just on that bit

Wall I will say is: don’t make a habit of spending like that.
I don’t know if you have a mortgage, if not one day you probably will apply for one.
They will view that spending as irresponsible,

PuppyMonkey · 17/09/2026 17:43

I’ve seen a few posts on social media recently where Santander were refusing to let people withdraw money from their account without having proof (eg a bill) of what the person intended to spend the money on. Confused

ZombieZebra · 17/09/2026 17:41

£1200 isn’t even that much really. The only time our card has ever been blocked was when I was using it in France, which was annoying as I’d registered it for use on the NatWest site prior to our trip. Took ages to sort that out.

Elieza · 17/09/2026 17:40

i can only imagine she said that spending like that can look like irresponsible spending to a lender who could red flag you?

which is almost the same as what you thought theyd said but isn’t.

how much debt have you got in your other accounts?

why do they care what you look like to lenders?
are you going for a mortgage soon or something?

jay55 · 17/09/2026 17:39

It’s against money laundering regulations to tip off a customer that they are suspected of money laundering

Vaxtable · 17/09/2026 17:39

banks more and more have to be stringent about money laundering, they can be very heavily fined
However they can’t do individual checks on each persons account so will have set parameters and likely your spending has triggered them, hence the block on the card

start to spend 9n a regular basis and you won’t have an issue

YourGoldLurker · 17/09/2026 17:38

My card has been blocked for far less than that. It will have been blocked because they've thought someone had stolen it

OrchardOwl · 17/09/2026 17:37

It would annoy me, but I wouldn’t complain. It would be a very minor annoyance that I’d forget about a few minutes later, not worth wasting my time complaining, and not worth wasting the call handler and their manager’s time by having to deal with the complaint.

HollyhocksandPeons · 17/09/2026 17:37

Alternative reality - cleaners, bank clerks lecture us. Anarchy, hierarchy is broken. The world has gone mad.

Middletoleft · 17/09/2026 17:36

Since the call will have been recorded, the CSA will be able to explain herself when the complaint is dealt with, so if it's as you say she'll be reprimanded internally.

Busymorn · 17/09/2026 17:34

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

TheWytch · 17/09/2026 17:34

Had you actually been money laundering, this would count as "tipping off" and she would be in no end of trouble herself.

GoodGirlFaith · 17/09/2026 17:34

No, I think some context is missing here, or a misunderstanding, or the call handler worded things wrongly.

'I need to be careful as it looks like money laundering, and I’m now a red flag to lenders!'

I don't think they were criticising what you are spending money on - they work in fraud, so they know how it may look and they know how it may look to lenders.

saveforthat · 17/09/2026 17:31

I know someone who worked for Lloyds and if they saw e.g. evidence of gambling they had to ask if the customer needed support so I can well believe this.

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