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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Bank worker has just lectured me on my spending

236 replies

kissfromaroses · 17/09/2026 17:15

I have been saving for a big shopping day for a while now. I’ve realised I hate going out to the shops so have instead done it online.

I transferred the savings into my spending account this morning and through the day have ordered bits and bobs. I tried to order something this afternoon and the card got blocked.

No worries, I call them to clarify.

The worker went far beyond fraud protection, in my eyes. She told me I was irresponsibly spending, I need to be careful as it looks like money laundering, and I’m now a red flag to lenders!

I didn’t ask for any of this. I’ve saved for six months to spend about £1,200. AIBU to consider a complaint?!

OP posts:
Amberlynnswashcloth · 17/09/2026 20:27

Confused as to why spending this amount would look like money laundering? Are you buying several of the same item then returning them, getting refunds or store credit repeatedly?

Khayker · 17/09/2026 20:24

kissfromaroses · 17/09/2026 17:21

I completely understand that it comes across a bit off - a larger payment into my account than usual and more transactions than usual. Fine.

What I don’t like is being scolded like a child

Unfortunately under the new rules on banks weeding out fraud they can speak to you like this. I feel your pain, I tried to transfer some money to pay for a bathroom remodel. It was blocked so I thought never mind, phone and get it unblocked. Didn't happen, the fraud dept at Lloyds said that I couldnt transfer money to a personal account acting as a business (not true, only LTD companies must have a business account by law). The guy in the fraud dept then told me that he suspected fraud as he couldn't find the name of the company at Companies House. When I told him that the contractor was just one person not registed at Companies House because he was not a limited company, he then froze my account and accused me of being complicite in a fraud. I had at this point been through security checks etc. To say I was fuming was an understatement. I calmed down and phoned back managed to speak to someone a bit more reasonable and my account was unlocked. I transferred money to my Barclays account and paid the contractor with no problems. Beware of Lloyds fraud dept, its populated with misinformed on stupid people. I am raising a complaint and will take it from there.

PhilosophicalCheeseSandwich · 17/09/2026 20:18

likeafishneedsabike · 17/09/2026 20:15

Ah so it’s like the thing on the banking app that says ‘are you absolutely SURE you want to send these funds? You may still be at risk’.
Just make the payment, dickhead. It’s my money.

And people who do get scammed will very often blame the bank. Yes, the customer aurhorised the payments and confirmed it was all above board - but why didn't the bank stop them? 😭

Laurmolonlabe · 17/09/2026 20:17

I would definitely complain to the banking Ombudsman, complain to the branch in the first instance and check there is no red flag on your account.

likeafishneedsabike · 17/09/2026 20:15

wontsomeonethinkofthechimdren · 17/09/2026 20:13

It's because so many people are getting scammed.

Ah so it’s like the thing on the banking app that says ‘are you absolutely SURE you want to send these funds? You may still be at risk’.
Just make the payment, dickhead. It’s my money.

AprilMizzel · 17/09/2026 20:15

Years ago DH was in hospital I had to order some furniture on card - not usual but not unkown. Flagged up by fraud - fair enough spoke to them said yes I had paid for those item - she still fucking cancelled the payments and cards as well leaving me with no access to money.

Usually DH would be around so would still have access to money. Had to beg family for tide me over till new cards came - could not have come at a worse time and there was an attitude it was my own fault.

likeafishneedsabike · 17/09/2026 20:14

PuppyMonkey · 17/09/2026 17:43

I’ve seen a few posts on social media recently where Santander were refusing to let people withdraw money from their account without having proof (eg a bill) of what the person intended to spend the money on. Confused

Interesting. So money laundering must be absolutely rife at present,

wontsomeonethinkofthechimdren · 17/09/2026 20:13

PuppyMonkey · 17/09/2026 17:43

I’ve seen a few posts on social media recently where Santander were refusing to let people withdraw money from their account without having proof (eg a bill) of what the person intended to spend the money on. Confused

It's because so many people are getting scammed.

ItsOnlyMee1 · 17/09/2026 20:11

If they lectured you they overstepped their remit. BUT to save up for half a year and spend it all in one day? They DO have a very good point.

Londongent · 17/09/2026 20:08

Some of the stories on here, there are some pretty terrible banks blocking cards for some obvious everyday spending.
Problem is this sort of transaction monitoring alerts have been offshored to people with little to no experience.
The person on the phone should not have mentioned any suspicion of money laundering at all

babyproblems · 17/09/2026 20:07

They should realise not everyone shops at Primark and frankly if you like the finer things in life 1200£ is completely reasonable!!! Especially if you are clearly responsible and have saved for it.
Ask to put your payment limits up - my card used to be blocked and in the end I asked for the limits to be increased and this seemed to solve the issue as it was no longer classed as ‘erratic spending’. Xox

Cakeandcardio · 17/09/2026 20:06

Was it RBS? I cannot be bothered with banks who make it difficult for me to get my money. I spend on cards where they don't have so many 'checks' now.

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 17/09/2026 20:03

I don't see how moving money from one account in your name to another account in your name could really be money-laundering; I feel this mostly because what is let's face it a largish amount to you or me is peanuts for organised crime.

Also, they must have your other account to look at and see you have been saving over quite a long time.

MrsCarson · 17/09/2026 20:01

Was it Santander by chance? My mother had a right go at the woman who she spoke to at Santander. Mum had a question, woman couldn't answer so after being condescending wanting to know why she was asking what she wanted to do with her money etc, she was put through to fraud instead of the dept that could answer her questions. Oh hell, no one speaks to my mother like that. She told them in no uncertain terms about it and said she'll be closing her account. She did, she transferred everything to another bank she has an account at. She was Livid.

geumsun · 17/09/2026 20:01

Total over-step by that bank employee. You should have told her yes it's a lot of expense, but you only replenish your dildo collection once in a while. Then cheerfully wished her a lovely day.

PhilosophicalCheeseSandwich · 17/09/2026 20:01

MyRubyFox · 17/09/2026 18:23

KYC Analyst here. Anti Money Laundering assessment on transactions is my job. No one sensible would think that kind of money is money laundering. Add a couple of zeros and then yes maybe. Absolutely ridiculous!

This isn't right. Money mules can have smaller payments made into several accounts with various banks. Not that what op did looks anything like being a money mule, they're not generally heading straight to M&S when the money hits the account

Jerrybalanitis · 17/09/2026 20:01

dracn · 17/09/2026 19:57

Banks are ridiculous over money laundering nowadays, the amount of questions they ask even if you want to send a relative a few quid for a Christmas gift is ludicrous! They always say it’s to prevent money laundering but surely you should be able to send a grandchild £50 without an inquisition.

I am fine with them not letting gangsters clean their cash but a bit rich when the vape shops and barbers are not penalised...

MintyBadger1975 · 17/09/2026 19:59

DoreenCorkhill · 17/09/2026 18:03

My 86 year old mother was asked what she was spending a substantial amount of money on when withdrawing from her bank account she replied ‘ Dancing boys gin and the rest will go up my nose ‘
She’s a card 🤣

I hope I'm like that if I'm lucky enough to live that long. Just awesome 👌 👏

Jerrybalanitis · 17/09/2026 19:58

I agree, hate their approach but I can only ever bless the woman who did over reach on a 50k transaction which, whilst not a scam, she has heard some negative things about a very small detail which would have affected the yield. Invested in a less interesting area and made a packet, all because she stopped the payment. I wouldnt have actually lost anything but would have been fed up with the return. She had absolutely no business stopping my transfer but bless her, I owe her about 18k 😀

dracn · 17/09/2026 19:57

Banks are ridiculous over money laundering nowadays, the amount of questions they ask even if you want to send a relative a few quid for a Christmas gift is ludicrous! They always say it’s to prevent money laundering but surely you should be able to send a grandchild £50 without an inquisition.

cornflakecrunchie · 17/09/2026 19:54

@MrsCartwrigth wow, not heard that about Monzo!

MintyBadger1975 · 17/09/2026 19:54

LittlePaintBox · 17/09/2026 19:44

They should have contacted you immediately to tell you they'd put a block on your account because of suspicious activity, so you could sort it out immediately.

My credit card was once blocked just before Christmas, which was really inconvenient. The reason was that there were a lot of purchases in a place where I didn't normally use it. I pointed out that I was Christmas shopping at a shopping centre, surely they recognised the pattern? I also recently temporarily lost the use of my debit card due to the same sort of suspicions, which was bad luck for me because I'm currently housebound after a brain tumour was removed, and this was the only way I could shop.

I wasn't told off for my irresponsibility on either occasion, and I doubt she had the authority to block your card before raising her concerns with you first (if not with a supervisor). I'd definitely complain if this happened to me, but then I'm a bit like that - my dad was the same!

.

monymonymony · 17/09/2026 19:54

That's completely abnormal and worth filing a complaint

DangerousLesions · 17/09/2026 19:53

I can understand a bank keen to tell you that recent activity looks a bit like money laundering because it is their job to protect us and there are so many scams out there. I've been glad of their caution in the past. It sounds like it's the tone of the caller which got your back up and understandably so. It's up to you what you spend money on, within reason. Banking seems to have changed recently in terms of their involvement in your affairs. I cancelled the cost of counselling with Better Help some time ago, then phoned the bank to check it was cancelled. The bank asked me if I was mentally okay, if I needed help and if I was interested in pursuing further therapy. Apparently they were going to assist me in that regard if I wanted. I was quite chuffed really.

MintyBadger1975 · 17/09/2026 19:50

OneLilacHedgehog · 17/09/2026 18:09

I think there is more to this. If OP had large payments into one bank account in another bank, and transfers it to her usual account, and then goes on a spending spree - then yes it looks like money laundering.

And banks only have to suspect money laundering to close your account. They don't need proof.

If OP makes a complaint the worker may get told off for potentially tipping off a customer who is money laundering.

And if your bank account is closed for suspected money laundering, the bank will report you to the police. And you will be investigated

They need far more evidence than spending £1200 on online shopping!