Being offended by being left on read after sex

I think he likely just didn’t know what to say in response. A thumbs up? A heart? ‘I’m glad the bed smells of me’? ‘I’m want a big cuddle too’? You both had fun and he messaged you to say so. I think maybe your message hinted towards a more meaningful relationship rather than a casual set up. Let things settle. He’s no idea what he wants at this point which is fair enough. Do you know what you want? You say you don’t want a relationship at the moment but your message and upset at the lack response suggests maybe on some level that you do. And that’s ok. But I think you need to step back from things and pause and let things unfold in their own time.

I suspect he thinks you’re telling him you love him. That’s what the heart emoji means to me.

Exactly this ^^ you have gone over the top with your message, got the hump and then self sabotaged - I’m sorry but I don’t think he has done anything wrong here and you have quite possibly wrecked what could have turned into something decent for you both

Maybe he was put off that you haven't changed the sheets! Get them in the wash today, will make you feel better too 😄

Best of luck with it. It sounds like he's a decent guy x

Why did you agree to just sex and occasional dates when clearly you wish a lot more.

as a pp said the convo had to end somewhere and that seems a reasonable place to me. It feels like you want the teenage thing of you hang up, no you hang up

if you want a full on relationship then say so. Don’t shag guys, say you want casual then get all huffy and that’s what you get, it’s so immature.

It was supposed to be just sex and yet you’ve started sending heart emojis etc. I think he is probably trying to make clear that he doesn’t want any of that. You have mismatched expectations so probably better to leave it.

(No criticism of you to want more emotional connection btw- I would too- but it’s not what you both signed up for. FWB is not for everyone.)

She wanted him to say how much he is missing her too. That’s what she wanted and why she is wounded and her pride hurt that he didn’t respond in kind.

But he doesn’t miss her as he was open about wanting something very casual and sex based.

He made it clear he didn't want a relationship. I said I don't either

Your answer is right here. You sent him a sentimental, romantic text - that wasn't what he signed up for. He's only interested in sex and companionship - which is fine if that's all you want too, but if you're looking for something romantic, he's not going to be the answer.

I think it's just damn rude tbh. He didn't even reply the next day. I've messaged him again, cancelling plans to go out and said I'm not in the mood for chatting. I feel rude doing this but I'm too offended to pretend I'm not

That will likely only confirm to him that you’ve developed feelings and DO want a relationship.

And also that he’s dodged a bullet.

What did you want him to say 😂😂 I’d have left that on read too.

He messaged you after sex to say how good it was. That says something. Just play it cool now.

its not like he hadn’t texted you. He did and you’d been chatting on text then you sent one that is clear you’re going to bed so he read it and went to sleep without bothering you by carrying on the chat. Your text didn’t need a response, it was fine to leave it there. The only reason you’re overthinking this and so hurt is because you already want more from this than you both agreed. It’s probably best to end it, but not because he didn’t reply to your text.

So he's either been scared off.
Was playing nice to get laid or the conversation just fizzled out and not a big deal.

I think the third option.

As an aside, it strikes me that being in a fwb is more f*ing hard work than being in a relationship.

All this standing on ceremony and being held to account because of a stupid little effing text you innocently forget to send.

Etiquette wise, it seems to be more hard work than being in a relationship or just having one night stands.

Why is this I wonder?

The nature of the text, worrying about being left on read and angrily cancelling future plans to go out is not very FWB like. Those are more the expectations you’d have if you were pursuing a relationship with someone and had been led to believe the other person wanted the same.

He’s already made it clear he doesn’t want that so you need to have a think as to whether a FWB type situation is actually for you or if you’re only going along with it in the hope that he’ll eventually change his mind. If it’s the latter you should probably take a step back as it’s a recipe for getting your heart broken.

Me too 😆

I leave people on read all the time or I sometimes add a 👍 but DD told me that I should just write something instead. This is madness. Not all messages need a back and forth.

This. He tells you clearly and openly he wants sex rather than a relationship. You agree, so he has sex with you. And then you respond with hearts, swooning over his scent and longing for him! And then with hurt feelings and punishment of him for not replying.

You’ve made it clear you do want a relationship. He’s probably wondering if the sex is worth the pain in the arse you’re going to be.

I was ready to say how awful if he hadn't responded but to me that's a goodnight message !

😂

The bed smelling thing is strange. You’ve over-egged the pudding there. So you made plans to go out & cancelled them cos he didn’t reply? Seems a bit OTT to me.

He sent you a message, you responded. How long were you expecting this to and fro to go on for?

I read the title as being left on road after sex, and was going to suggest LTB.

I agree that you Come across to him and here that you want a relationship

He hasn’t ignored you, you were texting back and forth. One of you had to stop messaging at some point. And you’re coming on quite intense for someone who doesn’t want a relationship. A love heart emoji could have freaked him out. You’re being ridiculous, just calm down.