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AIBU?

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AIBU to think mixed-sex changing facilities should be limited?

63 replies

meinolini · 15/09/2026 16:43

AIBU - I read that this article and, whilst I am not surprised, I think we really must halt this movement to gender neutral facilities.

It is really disconcerting that all the crimes were in mixed sex facilities.

"Almost 100 sex crimes including rape and assaults have been recorded at swimming pools and leisure centres in Scotland, figures reveal."

“Freedom of information (FOI) reports from police involving 91 of the country’s 340 swimming pools revealed 51 incidents of voyeurism and 30 sexual offences against young girls, with 11 involving youngsters under the age of 13.
One rape was recorded, at Kirkcaldy Leisure Centre.
In addition, 25 sexual assaults and 21 other sexual offences were reported, and in total there were 81 female victims. All offences were committed between 2023 and 2025.
Incidents occurred at venues with shared facilities. No crimes were recorded at centres with single-sex facilities but incidents were reported at pools which had mixed-sex “village-style” shared showers and changing facilities.
Mary Howden, of WRN Scotland, warned local authorities must provide “safe, risk-free spaces”.
She said: “Our painstaking FOI research gave us a harrowing insight into a pattern of deeply concerning sexual offending at swimming pools and leisure centres across every part of the country.
“The overall number of offences of almost 100 is truly shocking, but what was really disturbing was the high number of offences involving young girls aged between 13 and 16. While there was a proliferation of sex offences at pools with shared shower and changing, we didn’t find a ­single offence at centres offering ­single-sex facilities."

YABU = Mixed sex changing rooms are fine
YANBU = Mixed sex facilities should be limited

OP posts:
meinolini · 15/09/2026 17:06

Does anyone know what the stats are in England or Wales?

OP posts:
Lovelyview · 15/09/2026 17:45

It's shocking OP. I knew there were concerns about hidden cameras and photos being taken under/over stalls but this is astonishing. And the fact that there were none when facilities were separated by sex shows that women's safety has been completely disregarded.

meinolini · 15/09/2026 17:55

Lovelyview · 15/09/2026 17:45

It's shocking OP. I knew there were concerns about hidden cameras and photos being taken under/over stalls but this is astonishing. And the fact that there were none when facilities were separated by sex shows that women's safety has been completely disregarded.

I find it unbelievable that women are supporting mixed sex toilets and changing rooms still.

OP posts:
meinolini · 15/09/2026 17:58

Please explain why IABU voter

OP posts:
Artefact23 · 15/09/2026 18:20

AIBU to think mixed-sex changing facilities should be limited?

I think the word you're looking for is "banned", not "limited".

Fidgety31 · 15/09/2026 18:25

I use mixed facilities and have done for many years . Don’t have a problem with them at all.

some of those sexual assaults could be between people that were there together ? Too easy to jump to conclusions without more info tbh.

meinolini · 15/09/2026 19:30

Fidgety31 · 15/09/2026 18:25

I use mixed facilities and have done for many years . Don’t have a problem with them at all.

some of those sexual assaults could be between people that were there together ? Too easy to jump to conclusions without more info tbh.

did you read many were girls aged 13-16

Can you not read @Fidgety31

OP posts:
Ponoka7 · 15/09/2026 19:38

Those of us who were against them from the start would just get patronised with "shock, horror, a man might see us washing our hands". Men are a danger to women and children, in a way female sex offenders aren't. We shouldn't be forced into locked spaces, alone, with them. It's ironic that most public toilets are linked with toilet charities in developing countries because women who don't have brick toilets are at risk of rape.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 15/09/2026 20:00

I voted YABU because i think there should always be the option of a family changing area as well - with all cubicles and with sight lines from the corridor in the walkways of it.

Mainly for the sake of parents taking their opposite sex kids in to change, but if there were sight lines through the bits that weren’t cubicles anyone could use those cubicles who felt uncomfortable elsewhere.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 15/09/2026 20:01

It’s the same with any universal type toilets - there just needs to be no “semi private” area where people are mingling behind a closed door.

Beer3000 · 15/09/2026 21:23

I have always liked these facilities, when going swimming with boys who are too old for the ladies, but too hapless to get changed on their own without losing their goggles and dropping their clothes in a puddle (~5 - 9).

Those are shocking statistics though, I've changed my mind.

meinolini · 16/09/2026 05:56

Fidgety31 · 15/09/2026 18:25

I use mixed facilities and have done for many years . Don’t have a problem with them at all.

some of those sexual assaults could be between people that were there together ? Too easy to jump to conclusions without more info tbh.

Honestly, your response is shocking.

OP posts:
tamade · 16/09/2026 07:27

meinolini · 16/09/2026 05:56

Honestly, your response is shocking.

So shocked that you replied twice!

Anyway those statistics speak for themselves and I should be enough to precipitate a rethink.

They probably don't tell the whole story and I think @Fidgety31 was trying to point that out. Were the offenders young, old, non binary, non-British etc?
Maybe it would be helpful to know, but the most expedient corrective action would be to ban compulsory mixed changing rooms.

meinolini · 16/09/2026 07:31

tamade · 16/09/2026 07:27

So shocked that you replied twice!

Anyway those statistics speak for themselves and I should be enough to precipitate a rethink.

They probably don't tell the whole story and I think @Fidgety31 was trying to point that out. Were the offenders young, old, non binary, non-British etc?
Maybe it would be helpful to know, but the most expedient corrective action would be to ban compulsory mixed changing rooms.

Edited

Does it matter whether they were young old, British??? Bit racist!

They were men.

OP posts:
Hoardasurass · 16/09/2026 07:43

Ponoka7 · 15/09/2026 19:38

Those of us who were against them from the start would just get patronised with "shock, horror, a man might see us washing our hands". Men are a danger to women and children, in a way female sex offenders aren't. We shouldn't be forced into locked spaces, alone, with them. It's ironic that most public toilets are linked with toilet charities in developing countries because women who don't have brick toilets are at risk of rape.

In my local swimming baths many of the men walk around the communal area including the mixed showers naked even when they know kids and women are around which is why I no longer go swimming and I know most women and girls have quit too.
Everytime the local council send out surveys asking why women and girls aren't using the facilities anymore they are told its because of the predatory behaviour of men and the lack of single sex facilities. The response from the council a notice saying keep your clothes on in the communal areas but no staff enforce it, no men are banned and the police wont even bother turning up.
So now its basically a male only swimming baths which is full of predatory men.

Hoardasurass · 16/09/2026 07:56

tamade · 16/09/2026 07:27

So shocked that you replied twice!

Anyway those statistics speak for themselves and I should be enough to precipitate a rethink.

They probably don't tell the whole story and I think @Fidgety31 was trying to point that out. Were the offenders young, old, non binary, non-British etc?
Maybe it would be helpful to know, but the most expedient corrective action would be to ban compulsory mixed changing rooms.

Edited

What has nonbinary got to do with anything?
Nonbinary is made up nonsense that is not recognised in law and everybody has a sex so can and should use the facilities for their sex.
The changing villages have been known to be dangerous for women and children for decades but are cheaper to run than single sex facilities with a few mixed sex family cubicles and are the preferred design of swim England and swim Scotland so all we get is mixed sex facilities and the predation of women and girls.
What we need is to go back to single sex facilities with a few family facilities and ban and report to the police any male who enters the female areas and/or walks around the communal areas naked

meinolini · 16/09/2026 07:56

Hoardasurass · 16/09/2026 07:43

In my local swimming baths many of the men walk around the communal area including the mixed showers naked even when they know kids and women are around which is why I no longer go swimming and I know most women and girls have quit too.
Everytime the local council send out surveys asking why women and girls aren't using the facilities anymore they are told its because of the predatory behaviour of men and the lack of single sex facilities. The response from the council a notice saying keep your clothes on in the communal areas but no staff enforce it, no men are banned and the police wont even bother turning up.
So now its basically a male only swimming baths which is full of predatory men.

That’s appalling @Hoardasurass

OP posts:
BlueSherbet · 16/09/2026 08:03

YANBU

There is no need for mixed sex facilities.

Family changing rooms are acceptable.

99% of people will be no hassle in mixed changing facilities, but you do get some creeps and we have had a rapid influx of men from inferior cultures whose conduct is not suitable for such an environment.

Women's space, safety and privacy are all non-negotiables.

Transvestites with delusions of grandeur (of "being a woman") should not be entertained either.

meinolini · 16/09/2026 08:21

Mixed sex facilities seem to be designed and thought about as if the facility will be always be busy with lots of people traffic. Safety in numbers.

Planners and people don’t consider very quiet times, maybe in the evening when a woman or young girl could be entering a mixed sex facility faced with a situation where it is just her and a man effectively in an enclosed room with further enclosed cubicles.

I have been faced with this situation and I instantly went into high alert. For me I was in a club and the music was loud, alcohol was a plenty and the club was nearly empty at this time. I went to the toilets down a dark corridor entered the room and as taken aback to see a guy in there. It was just me and him. I hadn’t seen it was a mixed sex toilet as I had been pointed in the direction by a staff member.

I am a super confident person and so I was surprised at my instinctive reaction, raised heart beat, nervous, heightened state of alert. I would never choose to walk down a corridor to an enclosed room and enter it with a male stranger, why would I? 1 in 4 of us will be raped in our life time and we, as woman, know that we have take all precautions possible to avoid any risks we can from men.

He was fine and clearly looked as awkward as I did nervous. Lucky me! However, as someone once said, in that situation the only thing keeping me safe was his intention, because if he had wanted to assault me there would have been nothing I could have done. Being the physically weaker sex.

I know the argument is that any man could go into the women’s if he wanted to assault a woman but when we are opening the door for them all we are raising our risks, as the data shows.

OP posts:
ErrolTheDragon · 16/09/2026 08:47

I’ve not been to our local pool for a while - the showers were few in number and completely open so only suitable for rinsing off with swimming costumes on (never saw anyone naked) and the changing was three rows of cubicles - female, mixed sex and male, with group/accessible rooms around the edge, and single sex loos. It was ok, not perfect but at least a reasonable attempt to provide for both sexes and mixed sex parent and children.

Purely single sex doesn’t work well for parents with opposite sex children at some ages/stages.

singthing · 16/09/2026 08:51

Fidgety31 · 15/09/2026 18:25

I use mixed facilities and have done for many years . Don’t have a problem with them at all.

some of those sexual assaults could be between people that were there together ? Too easy to jump to conclusions without more info tbh.

How do you know there isn't covert footage of you naked, mid-change in what you thought was a private cubicle? Or on the toilet there? That is a whole genre in itself and demand is high for new material.

Of course, if you are "what I don't know won't hurt me", then no big deal. But I suspect you'd probably rather not be included in that cache of wankbank material if you had the choice.

narrowrailroad · 16/09/2026 09:15

Where I am (South East) the local public/not for profit leisure centres all have mixed sex cubile changing. Its only the private gyms/spas etc that have old fashioned single sex locker rooms where some people just strip off randomly in full view of others. So there is no possibility to do a like for like comparison of single sex vs mixed as the demographics and just overall numbers using the facilities are dramatically different.

Personally I think the mixed sex thing is misleading - its more about what is the environment like - are there staff around, when did these assaults happen? Our local leisure centre genuinely doesn't have any quiet times, its always packed out even during the day. Things could be better as the cubicles could have higher/lower doors and frames, but other than that it feels a much more comfortable environment and much safer than the local places with single sex changing with zero privacy.

narrowrailroad · 16/09/2026 09:17

singthing · 16/09/2026 08:51

How do you know there isn't covert footage of you naked, mid-change in what you thought was a private cubicle? Or on the toilet there? That is a whole genre in itself and demand is high for new material.

Of course, if you are "what I don't know won't hurt me", then no big deal. But I suspect you'd probably rather not be included in that cache of wankbank material if you had the choice.

Edited

Why do you assume covert cameras are only placed by men or only in mixed facilities? Many leisure centres including the more 'luxury' ones have more male staff than female, including those cleaning changing rooms, doing maintenance etc.

meinolini · 16/09/2026 09:24

narrowrailroad · 16/09/2026 09:15

Where I am (South East) the local public/not for profit leisure centres all have mixed sex cubile changing. Its only the private gyms/spas etc that have old fashioned single sex locker rooms where some people just strip off randomly in full view of others. So there is no possibility to do a like for like comparison of single sex vs mixed as the demographics and just overall numbers using the facilities are dramatically different.

Personally I think the mixed sex thing is misleading - its more about what is the environment like - are there staff around, when did these assaults happen? Our local leisure centre genuinely doesn't have any quiet times, its always packed out even during the day. Things could be better as the cubicles could have higher/lower doors and frames, but other than that it feels a much more comfortable environment and much safer than the local places with single sex changing with zero privacy.

It might feel safer to you, but the stats show a different picture.

Are you aware of the rise in phone camera's being used under cubicles in mixed sex changing rooms and toilets. One recent case, which I believe that went to court, where a camera was placed under the seat by a man in a mixed sex toilet and he was 'live streaming’ forgive the pun, women peeing onto a fetish site or something like that. I’ll see if I can find the news article.

OP posts:
Nemorth · 16/09/2026 09:24

Our local council pool has a changing village. It’s also the pool used by the local secondary school. I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve had to shout at teenage boys from looking under or climbing over the cubicles. NOT to sexually harass but to prank their friends. I always make the point that they might get the wrong cubicle and could end up in serious trouble. A minor good thing is the school takes the pupils to the pool in single sex classes.