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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to expect the birthday cake booking date changed without extra charge?

434 replies

JavSurge · 14/09/2026 11:38

We had to cancel DD's birthday party the day before due to her having S&D. We'd have gone through with it if it was a runny nose but not S&D, as much for our guests as well as her.

Anyway, most of the vendors (hall, entertainment etc) have honoured bookings in changing the date without charge given the circumstances.

As for the cake, she wants to charge us again. Now, for context, she had not finished the cake, had not started icing or decorating it. What's more, once I informed her the party couldn't go ahead, she said she'd pop the sponge in the freezer to be used for another time.

Now we have a new date arranged I have contacted her (2 days later) and asked if the sponge will last (Google says it will) until the party in a couple of weeks and if she's available to decorate it and deliver it on that date.

She's come back saying she didn't freeze it in the end and instead gave it to her neighbour, and now expects us to pay again for a new cake?!
If she'd iced it and it was ready to go then I would completely understand. However, given that it's just a change of date, am I being unreasonable to have expected her to just to use the sponge for us, or even used the sponge for another customer and then made it fresh. Either way to me seems reasonable as she'd not be using extra resources or time.
I can of course understand she might have got an extra customer (money) on the later date but it wouldn't have caused her extra costs.

Am I being being completely unreasonable?
If the cake was decorated I'd have never asked her to redo the whole thing for free but given that she said she was freezing the sponge surely it would be reasonable for her to do it free of charge (or a nominal fee if anything extra is needed)?

OP posts:
ToKittyornottoKitty · 14/09/2026 18:14

MsSquiz · 14/09/2026 18:13

It says in the OP “now expects us to pay again for a new cake”

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I agree, it’s misleading, but that’s not what’s happening. OP doesn’t no if the baker wants her to pay again or how much, she’s waiting for a reply

MsSquiz · 14/09/2026 18:13

ToKittyornottoKitty · 14/09/2026 18:11

No she isn’t

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It says in the OP “now expects us to pay again for a new cake”

ToKittyornottoKitty · 14/09/2026 18:11

MsSquiz · 14/09/2026 18:10

The cake maker is

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No she isn’t

MsSquiz · 14/09/2026 18:10

arethereanyleftatall · 14/09/2026 18:07

No one has said she should pay full price twice.

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The cake maker is

ToKittyornottoKitty · 14/09/2026 18:09

Pinkelephant66 · 14/09/2026 17:55

Contract…. For a birthday cake?!

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Well yeah it’s a £200 cake

arethereanyleftatall · 14/09/2026 18:07

MsSquiz · 14/09/2026 17:50

So why should the OP pay for 2 cakes when she will have only received 1 because the first one was given to someone else?

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No one has said she should pay full price twice.

Pinkelephant66 · 14/09/2026 17:55

Lougle · 14/09/2026 11:42

You booked her time as well as the ingredients. I think she should be charging you a partial rate. If she's charging you again, you should have been able to have the previous cake. What does the contract say?

Contract…. For a birthday cake?!

MsSquiz · 14/09/2026 17:54

arethereanyleftatall · 14/09/2026 16:30

I genuinely am baffled that people think it’s OK to keep your £200 AND the cake

I don’t think I’ve seen anyone say that. My reading of this is that everyone has said she should have had the first cake that she asked for.

but plenty of us are trying to help the op understand why it would be completely unreasonable to expect the cake maker to make and decorate a new cake on a different day (even using the frozen sponge) either for free or a nominal charge (as per her op).

the reason it is unreasonable is because the cake maker already blocked out her diary on the originally planned date to decorate the cake. The op needs to pay for her time there.

that’s the bit the op can’t understand

The OP has paid for a cake to be made and decorated.

the cake was made but not decorated

OP was told the cake would be frozen to use another time (OP presumed this meant her party as she had paid for it)

OP was then told the cake has been given away.

the OP is now out £200 for a cake she has not received (decorated or not) and is expected to pay the same again? That’s ridiculous!

the cake maker should have offered the OP the cake as it was at the time of cancellation or should be offering a new cake at a reduced price.

technically the cake maker has given away a cake a customer has paid for to someone else, is that not technically theft?

MsSquiz · 14/09/2026 17:50

ForPlumReader · 14/09/2026 17:09

She made the cake, even though not fully decorated, and will now have to repeat the process. The first cake should have been offered to you as per cost, but you do need to pay for the repeat.

So why should the OP pay for 2 cakes when she will have only received 1 because the first one was given to someone else?

arethereanyleftatall · 14/09/2026 17:47

holidayhelpneeded1 · 14/09/2026 16:44

And I've not seen where the OP expects the second one for free but is concerned that another full price is going to be expected.

Lots of people are justifying it but seem to be missing the fact that full price was paid but no cake was given. People talking about how the baker cant work for free but seem to miss that they paid full price for nothing and then was told their £200 cake was handed to a neighbour rather than frozen as they were told.

The whole thing feels like terrible communication.

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It’s literally the title of the thread!

MsSquiz · 14/09/2026 17:47

Paganpentacle · 14/09/2026 16:03

She's made two cakes.
That's TWICE her time, even if you discount the ingredients she still used her oven etc.

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Yes but the cake she made should have been given to the OP as she had already paid for it!

the OP didn’t say “I don’t need the cake, so do what you want with it”
the cake maker said she’d freeze it, the OP took that to mean for her DD’s rescheduled party.

this situation has happened to me before and we cancelled on the day of the party - I ended up with a buffet for 60 kids that we chose to give to a local homeless charity rather than it go to waste. That was our choice.

the cake maker giving away the original cake that was paid for, was not the OP’s choice

DuckySir · 14/09/2026 17:37

If she didn’t want to freeze it as she said, I think either she should have only charged you for her time to bake the cake and ingredients for the cake (including any specific decorations she might have bought), and given you the plain sponge or just made the cake as you ordered and gave it to you anyway since you’d already paid. No way should she have gave it to her neighbour so this out your consent, you had already paid so technically owned that plain sponge.

Lotusina · 14/09/2026 17:29

I’m still interested to hear more about the design, it may throw a lot of light on it.

HollaHolla · 14/09/2026 17:18

I'd expect to pay for the ingredients she used in the cake, but probably not for the decoration ingredients, given they hadn't been used. I'd also expect to be paying for her time (used, and the time not used, but reserved.)
I wouldn't expect to pay the original deliver fee, because that didn't happen.

ForPlumReader · 14/09/2026 17:09

She made the cake, even though not fully decorated, and will now have to repeat the process. The first cake should have been offered to you as per cost, but you do need to pay for the repeat.

Grumpyoldcat · 14/09/2026 17:07

She should have, imo, only charged for sponge but also not given it away as its technically yours. Probably nothing more you can do. I wouldnt be spending a load more money on another cake but buy one or two from Waitrose.

holidayhelpneeded1 · 14/09/2026 16:44

arethereanyleftatall · 14/09/2026 16:30

I genuinely am baffled that people think it’s OK to keep your £200 AND the cake

I don’t think I’ve seen anyone say that. My reading of this is that everyone has said she should have had the first cake that she asked for.

but plenty of us are trying to help the op understand why it would be completely unreasonable to expect the cake maker to make and decorate a new cake on a different day (even using the frozen sponge) either for free or a nominal charge (as per her op).

the reason it is unreasonable is because the cake maker already blocked out her diary on the originally planned date to decorate the cake. The op needs to pay for her time there.

that’s the bit the op can’t understand

And I've not seen where the OP expects the second one for free but is concerned that another full price is going to be expected.

Lots of people are justifying it but seem to be missing the fact that full price was paid but no cake was given. People talking about how the baker cant work for free but seem to miss that they paid full price for nothing and then was told their £200 cake was handed to a neighbour rather than frozen as they were told.

The whole thing feels like terrible communication.

Ewock · 14/09/2026 16:43

JavSurge · 14/09/2026 16:23

Still waiting and that's exactly my point!

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Has she said how much she is going to charge for a new cake? It really depends what that price is to whether she is being unreasonable.
I had interpreted from your post that she had asked for £200 again.

Ethelspagetti · 14/09/2026 16:37

If she’s going to charge you again then she needed to have given you the cake surely?! Not given it away! Her saying she will freeze it for the new date would make me think that’s great. You need to find out if you’ll have to pay extra. If she wants you to pay again I’d say that’s not fair as she never gave you the cake.

arethereanyleftatall · 14/09/2026 16:30

I genuinely am baffled that people think it’s OK to keep your £200 AND the cake

I don’t think I’ve seen anyone say that. My reading of this is that everyone has said she should have had the first cake that she asked for.

but plenty of us are trying to help the op understand why it would be completely unreasonable to expect the cake maker to make and decorate a new cake on a different day (even using the frozen sponge) either for free or a nominal charge (as per her op).

the reason it is unreasonable is because the cake maker already blocked out her diary on the originally planned date to decorate the cake. The op needs to pay for her time there.

that’s the bit the op can’t understand

gerispringer · 14/09/2026 16:25

OP could have shared the original cake out or frozen it herself if she knew she was going to have to pay for two cakes.

Whoops75 · 14/09/2026 16:25

JavSurge · 14/09/2026 15:34

I hear you, but if she decided she didn't want to freeze the cake, she could have said, hey I've not actually got the room, shall I drop it over to you as you've already paid for the cake and delivery?

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I think it was up to you to ask for it imo.
You cancelled the order for D&V so am not sure why she would think to offer.

Original poster
JavSurge · 14/09/2026 16:23

holidayhelpneeded1 · 14/09/2026 16:01

Did you point out to her that you had paid for that cake so it felt like a bizarre thing to do if she expected you to pay for another one? I would honestly assume she was planning on doing you another one on your chosen date if she had given it away. Because if she expected you to pay for the first one AND another one, the only reasonable thing to do is give you both cakes.

I genuinely am baffled that people think it's OK to keep your £200 AND the cake and you are supposed to just hand over full cost for another one. Im not saying this person should work for free but if you paid for that first cake, you dont just give it away to the random neighbour at your expense!

Has she responded with what she is expecting?

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Still waiting and that's exactly my point!

OP posts:
arethereanyleftatall · 14/09/2026 16:22

nomas · 14/09/2026 16:18

I thought OP has only paid for 1 cake?

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So far, but from her op her expectation is that the cake maker will produce a second cake on a second new date for free (or a nominal price).

PinkyFlamingo · 14/09/2026 16:21

Maeve0098 · 14/09/2026 12:35

Fair enough, but that wasn’t my point. My point was that she didn’t refund OP because of the late cancellation and that’s fine. But OP should have received the cake she paid for. That’s not okay.

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Yes but thete was no point in receiving the cake as it would have gone on before new party.