Was my neighbour rude when I asked her to keep noise down?

it seems like the soundproofing in this building is non existent if you can all hear each other that much. It could be that keeping the noise down would mean people in her flat feeling like they are walking on eggshells, unable to even talk normally. Understandably, she’s not prepared to curtail normal family life.

I live in a flat with teenagers downstairs and students all around the area. The general rule around here is to tolerate noise til midnight on work nights and til 2.00am on Fridays and Saturdays. Noise for 10 minutes at 11.30 on a Saturday night is not unreasonable in a flat.

If it is a one off I’d leave it, not that it is right what they’re doing but sometimes things escalate. My neighbour does this occasionally (and a lot of other things too, dog barking, drugs, parties, fights), I have spoken to them about it (the unsocial elements of it) and their advice was that I should move. I really do feel some people have zero consideration for others and it’s poor generational parenting or they’re just “ pita’s”
I do appreciate there could be a gust of wind to slam a door or an arguement and this is all fine, but sometimes neighbours like this will just be blo*dy rude. If you live amongst a lot of people you have to be considerate there will be noise, but also be considerate as people will hear this noise and be annoyed. Usually the “live and let live” brigade, who are loud and ignorant.

I’m in a similar area / building where there are a lot of (wealthy) students and young professionals so evenings can be quite noisy especially in summer. Everyone tolerates it as long as it’s not every single weekend by the same people and not to complete excess (like the guy who came back from Pride and played deafening trance music from 4am until 6pm the next day!)

Actually I find the people with young children much harder to live with. I think the parents become immune to the high pitched shrieking and have zero clue how miserable they make life for their neighbours.

You are comparing some noise from an upstairs flat with being in a concentration camp? I don’t get it.

Mine is the same, I can hear my upstairs neighbours getting ready for work at 6am, right down to his morning wee! Luckily we operate on similar schedules. The person there before him was hard of hearing and his late night TV watching drove me a bit crazy.

That’s exactly like our area. Every weekend or every night by the same people is not on but that rarely happens and a polite word when the new students arrive each September usually sorts it out.

The children literally screaming on the way to wrap around care at the local school at 7.45am every school day mind…

Well, she is reasonable in that the noise did reduce immediately.

And absolutely wild to compare it to being in a concentration camp. What the actual fuck.

sorry I think YABU. 5-10 minutes of noise really isn’t bad and I certainly wouldn’t have went running up. Living in a flat below people will mean noise. And it goes both ways! May be an unpopular opinion but I think otherwise good neighbours who have an occasional party/social gathering in their home even with noise that goes very late is fine with me. Especially at the weekend. People should be allowed to live their lives! Living in close proximity to others will always mean some level of disturbance.

What the hell is wrong with you to compare your situation to being in a concentration camp?

Completely unacceptable.

Council noise team employee here.

Kindly, if the noise was voices/laughter/banging doors for 5-10 minutes, and the noise reduced following your intervention, your neighbour may be a bit inconsiderate but not necessarily unreasonable.
Your lifestyle with two young children will be incompatible with the lifestyles of others - that's not to say either are in the wrong, it's just life in a multi-occupancy building with what seems like poor soundproofing.
Noise from your children may wake her/be irritating at whatever time she is trying to sleep or relax.
So sure, she may not have been thrilled with a knock on the door at midnight but it achieved what you wanted.

I'd leave it for now.

But last night it happened for a good 5-10 mins before I went up.

Sorry OP but this is ridiculous.

It was Saturday night, it wasn’t even midnight and you went up after 5-10mins.

They’d likely just got in and would have just got home so it is going to be noisier.

If it’s a regular thing, then I would mention it in passing about the sound travelling down and waking your DCs up.

But I can see why they got so defensive.

She was probably a bit pissed making noise at that time of night and pissed people have no filter. Talk to her again in the daytime when she’s sober.

I think complaining after 5 or 10 minutes is a bit much to be honest.

Midnight slamming doors and being loud is totally rude if they are upstairs.
Kids arent up slamming doors or being loud near midnight..big difference.
Do you have a council program to sort this ongoing nosie out? Use it.
Neighbour inconsiderate and needs to quiet. Petty is what some people do for some strange reason.

Concentration camp ? 😵‍💫

I think you should tell her then. Leave a note explaining it.

If they party all night they sleep all day. When your going out heavy metal playing full blast near their bedroom.