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Original poster

AIBU not to apologise after child hit head near shop door

47 replies

Squigglywiggly · 12/09/2026 18:39

My teenage daughter opened a shop glass door of a large store. A kid who was standing next to it decided at that point to swing back on the metal stair rail and bumped his head. We watched to make sure they safely went back to family.

As we walked away we were being muttered at for not apologising? Should we or should the parents have prevented the accident in 1st place by stopping him swinging by doors!

OP posts:
sweetpickle2 · 12/09/2026 18:41

I mean I’d have said sorry anyway as they were the ones with the injured child even if I wasn’t accepting responsibility, it’s not that deep.

Flatandhappy · 12/09/2026 19:01

Why should you apologise because people aren’t supervising their kid?

BillieWiper · 12/09/2026 19:07

I'd instinctively say sorry to anyone of any age if a door I was pushing somehow struck them and potentially slightly hurt them.

But I wouldn't dwell on it too much. They were probably embarrassed the kid wasn't being supervised adequately. Ultimately you saying sorry wouldn't have changed much.

Maybe I'd have uttered something like 'careful!' rather than sorry if they really were in the wrong.

Error404FucksNotFound · 12/09/2026 19:09

Sorry isnt just admitting fault.
Sorry someone hurt themselves is a valid use of the word.

Sirzy · 12/09/2026 19:11

It was an accident but I would have still said sorry.

TheOccupier · 12/09/2026 19:17

Only an English person would apologise when someone else hurts themselves. The kid FA and FO!

KilkennyCats · 12/09/2026 19:19

Error404FucksNotFound · 12/09/2026 19:09

Sorry isnt just admitting fault.
Sorry someone hurt themselves is a valid use of the word.

Yes, this. Really, op! It’s just a pleasantry, you weren’t admitting legal liability.

TulipCat · 12/09/2026 19:23

It's just a social pleasantry to help move on from a minor clash.

pastadish · 12/09/2026 19:24

KilkennyCats · 12/09/2026 19:19

Yes, this. Really, op! It’s just a pleasantry, you weren’t admitting legal liability.

Show quote history

In this instance saying sorry would be saying that you were the cause of the child bumping their head. I wouldn’t have apologised. Apologising when someone gets hurt and it’s not your fault is ridiculous and it isn’t a pleasantry as it doesn’t mean that.

TheCoatThatLaunched1000Emails · 12/09/2026 19:27

Your daughter was using the door in the normal and correct manner. The child was playing about. The parents' fault for letting him mess about near a door people were trying to use. No apology necessary for using a door in the usual way and being unable to predict a child's horseplay.

DeterminedRat · 12/09/2026 19:27

I say sorry when someone is standing in my way in the supermarket so yeah if I bonked a kid on the head I'd say sorry. I wouldn't have a go if someone didn't say sorry to my kid though.

SummerHolsFinished · 12/09/2026 19:29

I would have said sorry and asked if they were ok. A child got hurt, it doesn’t really matter who was at fault.

LittleMonks11 · 12/09/2026 19:31

I would have asked if the kid was ok because I’m not a miserable old arsehole most of the time.

Makebelieveanotherlife · 12/09/2026 19:32

SummerHolsFinished · 12/09/2026 19:29

I would have said sorry and asked if they were ok. A child got hurt, it doesn’t really matter who was at fault.

Exactly.
op bad parenting from you to teach your child that.
So if your child hurt an elderly person who was in the way, they would just walk off arrogantly because it wasn’t their fault?

Soontobe60 · 12/09/2026 19:34

‘I’m really sorry to hear about your mum’
’I’m so sorry you lost your baby’
’We were sorry to hear that you didn’t get that job you went for’
’I’m sorry you didn’t like the holiday you paid a lot for’

All valid reasons to apologise, none of them the fault of the person saying sorry.

Weirdpig · 12/09/2026 19:44

Probably depends where you're from. In the UK it is pretty normal to say sorry if someone else walks into you, even if you were stationary and not in a stupid place. So a lot of people would apologise in these circumstances.

TheFishFish · 12/09/2026 19:47

It's not like it costs anything to just say sorry, even if strictly speaking it wasn't your daughter's fault. She still hurt the kid. Shitty not to say sorry for that.

KilkennyCats · 12/09/2026 19:47

Soontobe60 · 12/09/2026 19:34

‘I’m really sorry to hear about your mum’
’I’m so sorry you lost your baby’
’We were sorry to hear that you didn’t get that job you went for’
’I’m sorry you didn’t like the holiday you paid a lot for’

All valid reasons to apologise, none of them the fault of the person saying sorry.

Exactly. I’d hate to meet some of these miserable farts in real life; who’d see an injured child and think “I was using the door correctly, not my fault his head got in the way”. Jesus.

TheCoatThatLaunched1000Emails · 12/09/2026 19:47

Soontobe60 · 12/09/2026 19:34

‘I’m really sorry to hear about your mum’
’I’m so sorry you lost your baby’
’We were sorry to hear that you didn’t get that job you went for’
’I’m sorry you didn’t like the holiday you paid a lot for’

All valid reasons to apologise, none of them the fault of the person saying sorry.

"I'm really sorry to hear about your mum" etc. is not an apology, though. "Sorry" in that usage means 'sad' not 'penitent'. It's an expression of sympathy, not remorse.

emptythebin · 12/09/2026 20:07

KilkennyCats · 12/09/2026 19:47

Exactly. I’d hate to meet some of these miserable farts in real life; who’d see an injured child and think “I was using the door correctly, not my fault his head got in the way”. Jesus.

Show quote history

You are unlikely to meet them in real life as they likely don’t go out!

InterIgnis · 12/09/2026 20:27

I’m not sure why they would expect you to say sorry. It was in no way your fault. I wouldn’t have thought to apologize either.

nomas · 12/09/2026 20:30

Squigglywiggly · 12/09/2026 18:39

My teenage daughter opened a shop glass door of a large store. A kid who was standing next to it decided at that point to swing back on the metal stair rail and bumped his head. We watched to make sure they safely went back to family.

As we walked away we were being muttered at for not apologising? Should we or should the parents have prevented the accident in 1st place by stopping him swinging by doors!

I think their response shows you were right not to apologise.

They should apologise for letting their child get in the way.

nomas · 12/09/2026 20:31

Soontobe60 · 12/09/2026 19:34

‘I’m really sorry to hear about your mum’
’I’m so sorry you lost your baby’
’We were sorry to hear that you didn’t get that job you went for’
’I’m sorry you didn’t like the holiday you paid a lot for’

All valid reasons to apologise, none of them the fault of the person saying sorry.

I think we need to stop socialising women to be sorry for things they haven’t done.

TheFishFish · 12/09/2026 22:00

InterIgnis · 12/09/2026 20:27

I’m not sure why they would expect you to say sorry. It was in no way your fault. I wouldn’t have thought to apologize either.

When I was a teenager i remember a little girl running into my foot and tripping over, and I didn't apologies because I thought "that wasn't my fault". So the kid just lie on the ground and I, as an awkward teen, didn't really know what to do and just stood there.

Looking back, I now realise that was just dickish behaviour because I now understand that an apology in such a scenario is less about admitting blame and just about showing a bit of care and empathy towards a child who has perhaps done something a bit daft.

But the point is - kids do daft things, and as adults we should have the emotional maturity handle the situation with a bit of grace and politeness, and I think I would have commented in the same way as the kids mum.

Avie29 · 12/09/2026 22:03

It was accidental, but you should still apologise for accidentally hurting someone.