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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to refuse a tenant's vulnerable guest staying in my HMO?

367 replies

Poster555 · 12/09/2026 08:48

NC for this. I know landlords aren’t always popular here.

I own and manage a few HMO’s in a nearby city. All legal requirements fulfilled, and normally have long term tenants.

I woke this morning to a host of missed calls.
One of the tenants, who has been fine for several years, invited his friend/ relative to stay for a temporary period as she was having issues with her landlord.
He did not discuss this with me or the other tenants.

Tenants are of course allowed visitors, including overnight for a day or two ( longer if they are visiting from abroad, etc. it’s pretty flexible).
The Tenancy Agreement is very clear that visitors visit the person, and they should never be left unsupervised in the property or given a key.

Around 6 weeks ago I was at the property for a routine treatment. The visitor was there alone. I had to ask her to leave as harmful chemicals were being used.

I had a chat with the tenant later and he explained it was a one off emergency.

It later transpired after complaints from other tenants and some unexplained damage that she was living in the property.

That was a problem. She had no primary address elsewhere and her presence took the property into the next level of HMO, meaning it needed to be registered.
The penalties for not registering when required are severe.

I told the tenant he needed to tell her to leave.

He did so and was met with a lot of resistance, but eventually she went, only to return in the early hours some days later. He felt he had to let her in.

He asked for my help to get her to leave. She refused, saying the council had told her that I’d have to get a court order to evict her.

Legal advice was that he invited her in and once he told her she was no longer welcome we could change locks when she was out.

She actually went out without a key and whilst she was gone he put her belongings in a locked shed outside, offering to open it when she needed.

That was about a week ago. I thought it was sorted. The calls in the early hours were from my tenant and the police asking if I would agree to her staying the night.

I would have said no and fortunately as they couldn’t reach me she was not allowed in.

This woman clearly has problems. I’d say she is vulnerable, but the same council that was advising her not to leave my property, whilst refusing any sort of practical assistance, would also be the ones taking action against me for running an unlicensed HMO.

The tenant is being bullied by so called friends to let her stay. He is under a lot of pressure but I’ve had to tell him that if he lets her stay I will have to take steps to evict him.

I have told him that I will speak to any official bodies that are trying to pressure him, and to the ‘friends’
I wasn’t expecting to speak to the police at 2-3 am though. Apparently they weren’t happy with me and thought the tenant should be able to take her in.

OP posts:
Ilovemyfam · 12/09/2026 14:16

sesquipedalian · 12/09/2026 11:12

I am astonished at some on this thread so blithely suggesting that the OP should break the law and risk not inconsiderable penalties in order to accommodate a drunken troublemaker. Quite clearly, this is someone who shouldn’t even be in this country, and the kindest thing would be to return her to her home country and her family, if she doesn’t have a correct entry visa. I’m also amazed that someone can give an address where they have no right to live, and this then becomes their “official” address unless they - the person who has wrongly given the address in the first place- deign to remove it. OP, you have my sympathy - this is an awful situation, and nothing to do with you. Best of luck with resolving it.

I also sympathize with the OP. It is not just about financial penalties is it? Having too many people living in the house could mean that there is a fire risk or some other hazard. Rules are there for a reason.

HavingABlether · 12/09/2026 14:11

ThisDandyWriter · 12/09/2026 13:01

It’s just not true. In this situation, the LL is not running an illegal hmo. I have a lot of expert knowledge on this area.
if this was me, I’d approach the council and explain the issue and issue formal warnings to the tenant and put in a complaint to the police.

Show quote history

If you have expert knowledge, then you'll know that one additional person can materially change HMO status.

seahorsessky · 12/09/2026 14:05

A lot of good people feel bad following the rules. A nurse told to get a patient discharged from hospital with no one at home to care for them. A midwife with a patient who has numerous babies taken into care for neglect.
You want to help this person as you're a decent human being, but you have to follow legal advice.

GroundCloves · 12/09/2026 14:03

Her friend took the blame at the time, but later admitted that she caused this damage, together with some broken furniture in his room.

I don’t think you can know who caused the damage. It is very convenient for the tenant to blame this lady.

Woodfiresareamazing2 · 12/09/2026 13:59

I think you're dealing with a difficult situation in the best way you can.

It's really not fair for the other tenants to have a troubled woman unofficially moving in. It sounds like she has a history of causing problems wherever she is.

Continue to support your tenant by absolutely refusing to have her back under any circumstances.

Good luck OP.

chirrupybird · 12/09/2026 13:54

Poster555 · 12/09/2026 13:44

I have only recently found out that there is some sort of court case involving her last landlord. That was when she first gave my address to the police. My impression is that she is not the victim, but I have no firm details.
The Tenancy Agreement says occasional stays of up to 2 days before permission is needed from the landlord. It’s got to be quite mean as if everyone had frequent overnight visitors the shared facilities would be overwhelmed.

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Yes you're not providing family accommodation it's for single people in rooms for one person. You would be in huge trouble for overcrowding if you allowed multiple people in each room and all the posters saying let her stay now would be saying what awful conditions people were living in. I would be sending a warning letter to the tenant saying any more breaches of the rules and they will be evicted.

MaggieMop · 12/09/2026 13:51

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
Poster555 · 12/09/2026 13:50

Puzzledandpissedoff · 12/09/2026 13:44

The social worker both insisted she was vulnerable and shouldn’t be homeless and also that she did not meet their criteria for help

Standard practise I'm afraid, @Poster555 - "let's see if we can get rid of this by passing it onto some other sap" - and all you can do is what you've done in making it clear it won't be you picking up the pieces

The "pack of lies" which it transpires this woman's told were sadly to be expected, and they're so predictable that I'm now more convinced than ever she's being advised ... very possibly by your tenant

I hope you are not right, but I can’t rule out the possibility that the tenant is continuing to help her. He didn’t let her in last night though.

I haven’t heard that she has been back from the other tenants.

I have a new microwave to deliver to the flat, and will only be in the shared areas, so will make an unannounced visit. I normally let the tenants know in advance as a matter of courtesy.

OP posts:
Pumpkindice · 12/09/2026 13:49

SuffolkMan · 12/09/2026 13:40

The woman is apparently an unemployed homeless alcoholic. If she is penniless with no recourse to public funds then she needs to leave the UK & return to her home country particularly because she is already causing problems.

Sorry, I should have said dob her in to Immigration Enforcement not Border Force.

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NRPF is not the same as being in the UK illegally. In fact, the majority of people who come to the UK from outside the EU as legal migrants have NRPF clauses, contrary to the popular belief that they're given free homes.
If you'd read the thread you'd have seen that the OP has already been given advice about what services can do - which is usually to help people return home to family- but if she's here legally it's her choice whether to do that, nothing to do with immigration.

chirrupybird · 12/09/2026 13:46

VointofPiew · 12/09/2026 09:44

Yeah I probably would. I'd not throw out anyone on the streets if I had the proximity and power to help them. That's not how I have been raised and I don't give a single shit about laws or policies. I care about humans. I'd let her stay off the books.

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PM the op your address and I'm sure she'll put her on a bus (or train).

Puzzledandpissedoff · 12/09/2026 13:44

The social worker both insisted she was vulnerable and shouldn’t be homeless and also that she did not meet their criteria for help

Standard practise I'm afraid, @Poster555 - "let's see if we can get rid of this by passing it onto some other sap" - and all you can do is what you've done in making it clear it won't be you picking up the pieces

The "pack of lies" which it transpires this woman's told were sadly to be expected, and they're so predictable that I'm now more convinced than ever she's being advised ... very possibly by your tenant

Original poster
Poster555 · 12/09/2026 13:44

Blondeshavemorefun · 12/09/2026 13:36

Makes you wonder what issues she has with her previous landlord - prob didn’t pay her rent and got kicked out esp if can’t claim anything

the tenants friends and community can help this female then if they feel he should

how long has she been staying - what is temporary in your contract

may be worth revising it @Poster555 to make sure this can’t happen again

I have only recently found out that there is some sort of court case involving her last landlord. That was when she first gave my address to the police. My impression is that she is not the victim, but I have no firm details.
The Tenancy Agreement says occasional stays of up to 2 days before permission is needed from the landlord. It’s got to be quite mean as if everyone had frequent overnight visitors the shared facilities would be overwhelmed.

OP posts:
SuffolkMan · 12/09/2026 13:40

Pumpkindice · 12/09/2026 13:24

Where in the OP's posts does it sound like that?

Also, border force work at the borders. Clue is in the name. Unless OP has neglected to tell us their HMO is located in an airport, I don't think they'll be interested.

Edited
Show quote history

The woman is apparently an unemployed homeless alcoholic. If she is penniless with no recourse to public funds then she needs to leave the UK & return to her home country particularly because she is already causing problems.

Sorry, I should have said dob her in to Immigration Enforcement not Border Force.

Blondeshavemorefun · 12/09/2026 13:36

Makes you wonder what issues she has with her previous landlord - prob didn’t pay her rent and got kicked out esp if can’t claim anything

the tenants friends and community can help this female then if they feel he should

how long has she been staying - what is temporary in your contract

may be worth revising it @Poster555 to make sure this can’t happen again

Original poster
Poster555 · 12/09/2026 13:35

I have spoken to the social worker or duty worker, I’m not clear exactly which department she is from.

The woman basically told a pack of lies. She has claimed that she thought she had a joint tenancy with the actual tenant. That’s easy to disprove.

She has told this person that I threatened her with physical ejection ( I did not, I told her that she was trespassing and she should leave). She was the one who asked if I was going to physically throw her out. This was in a telephone conversation.

She also complained that the shower was unusable. ( it was a bit harder to use because someone pulled the rail down and I had to get someone in to fix it). Her friend took the blame at the time, but later admitted that she caused this damage, together with some broken furniture in his room.

The social worker both insisted she was vulnerable and shouldn’t be homeless and also that she did not meet their criteria for help.

We reached a bit of a stalemate, but the bottom line is that I told her the woman will not be allowed into the flat.

OP posts:
GroundCloves · 12/09/2026 13:35

Why aren’t the friends of the tenant offering up their homes?

Puzzledandpissedoff · 12/09/2026 13:34

... part of the reason for my concern is that this person is not known to me. I only know her first name
With hindsight it might have been a good idea to get her full details

Even if you'd wanted to I suspect getting her full details would be very difficult, @Poster555 - the more so if they both share the attitude their community's already making clear by insisting your tenant should house her. Full details enable much easier reporting to authorities and it's entirely possible she's been advised about that

Personally I liked the suggestion of getting a fake door camera; they may well remove it and claim vandalism, but it's worth a try

PissedOffAutistic · 12/09/2026 13:33

I have no useful advice, but just wanted to say that you sound like a fabulous landlord - it is so kind of you to try to take the pressure off your tenant by telling him to tell his friends it is you refusing this woman staying.

GroundCloves · 12/09/2026 13:33

TheSmallAssassin · 12/09/2026 13:21

Where are single people supposed to live if they can't afford a property to live in on their own?

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Edited as hadn’t read quote history

Meteorite87 · 12/09/2026 13:32

SethAndReubenTooSendGaloshes · 12/09/2026 09:43

Use your imagination. Something OP does not want to get mixed up in.

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"Dangerous chemicals" stood out to me in the op.

@Poster555 Do what is best for you. It's understandable you do not want her in your property.

That woman was staying for free, presumably. You were never legally her landlady.

LIZS · 12/09/2026 13:30

I think you also have a duty of care to your other tenants. If she is volatile and destructive she, and anyone else’s “guest” behaving similarly, should be actively excluded. If your tenant is part of a wider cultural community there must be someone else who could support her search for accommodation.

Shineonyoucrazy · 12/09/2026 13:29

Elieza · 12/09/2026 10:04

i care about humans too. However i also care about the law and my legal responsibilities, as im sure the op does and if i were her i’d think about my moral responsibilities ie the woman is causing damage to my property and upsetting people.

So i would expect the council, who have a legitimate responsibility to house her, to step up and get on with it instead of trying to pass the buck elsewhere.

i would issue the tenant in question with notice in writing. but (verbally only) tell him if he gets her to leave and not let her in again EVER AGAIN NOT EVEN TO USE THE LOO ETC you will rescind it in writing. That you do not want him out at this stage and this strategy is a means to an end.

That way he can show her and his so called pals who are telling him to keep her there (likely so they don’t have to deal with her, presumably thats where she stayed when she left for five days or whatever it was and caused mayhem there) that he is now out because of her. He may choose to bundle her out the door. i know i would. or both could attend the council as homeless due to the eviction letter. During which time you could change the locks and not let her in again.

Councils do not have a responsibility to house everyone. They never have. They have a duty to house families with children and disabled/sick people but single people are potentially only entitled to help and advice. There is a duty to house asylum seekers under different legislation.

Keepitrealnomists · 12/09/2026 13:29

Sounds like she could be here illegally, trafficked into the country, she could be a sex worker, or a victim of modern day slavery. You need to go to the police OP

Pumpkindice · 12/09/2026 13:24

SuffolkMan · 12/09/2026 13:21

At best it sounds like she is on a visa waiver & has likely overstayed that. It can't do any harm to dob her in to Border Force as an illegal immigrant.

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Where in the OP's posts does it sound like that?

Also, border force work at the borders. Clue is in the name. Unless OP has neglected to tell us their HMO is located in an airport, I don't think they'll be interested.

Shineonyoucrazy · 12/09/2026 13:23

AlwaysExtraHot · 12/09/2026 09:15

I don’t get why the police are involved.

They end up dealing with loads of situations for all sorts of reasons with vulnerable people and trying to find her shelter for the night is routine.