To be shocked at ‘school readiness’

I'm in a secondary school and this Year 7 cohort is the most challenging I've even encountered (worked in secondary for 10
years) in terms of anxiety, lack of resilience and common sense.

Unfortunately I can only see it getting worse.

I wonder if part of it is copying behaviour. So one or two children, for example, drop their coats on the floor, can't put their coats on, leave the toilet door open and others simply copy it because it's 'easier'? It takes a strong minded child to go and hang up their coat if previous children going in in front have dropped theirs on the floor, and if your cohort is standing there waiting for the teacher to put their coats on for them, then they are likely to do the same, even if they are perfectly capable of doing it themselves if on their own.

@muminhertswe still do the symbol thing

For what it’s worth, a number of Australian states instituted free preschool at age 3 and 4 - delivered either as a standalone community preschool or as part of a nursery setting - as so many 5 and 6 year olds (as many as half) were turning up developmentally unready for school.

It’s not necessarily a case of UK children are too young for school, it’s what happens before they go to school.

I started school in the 1970s and every child had an animal stuck on their peg so anyone who couldn’t read their name could still find their things. I remember all these years later that mine was a giraffe. I am not sure I could read my own name at age 4 and it definitely hasn’t held me back in life!

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-43919090

That is a disgrace. My little girl is 2 and can do most of those things with a little help.

I think screen time and lazy parenting is to blame but I also think babying older children is a contributing factor. I know some of my friends are desperate to keep their children young and babyish - I really don’t understand this. They let them talk in baby voices, whine, ask for dummies, do everything for them. Some even have 10 year olds who can’t even make a drink for themselves. It’s like they’re desperate for their children to still need them for everything but you’re not helping the child become independent. Equally, the mothers all complain of burn out - I am not surprised.

Recognising your own name is a very useful thing to be able to do- that way they can find their coat peg, their book bag, their school drawer if they have one, their own exercise book etc. It is often one of the first things that parents and nurseries are asked to teach children so they can be more independent when they start school. Most do it naturally without formal teaching by age 5 if they have been brought up in a household where parents have played with them and done drawing and writing play like making cards for family and friends, had their name written on their paintings in nursery, played with magnetic letters etc. had clothes or toys with their name on etc. There used to be very few children who didn't recognise their own name starting Reception class.

Might not be their own but they get given the parent's phone to occupy themselves.

I also wonder whether the increase in nursery attendance and other childcare settings is contributing to this. It's actually much quicker to just get the children in their coats rather than teaching the children how to do it. It's much quicker to not make sure every child has said please or thank you. When children were at home with a parent more, it was more likely to be 1 to 1 or 1 to 2 at most, so lots more time for the parents to teach these kind of skills.

@Anarchy99No full time working parents haven’t always been a thing or can you link to some evidence plus commutes have increased.

Exactly.

It does not surprise me. Its gentle parenting, you see it all the time- i love my kids endlessly, but they are going to grow up into functioning adults. And to do that i need to parent them, whether they like it or not!

90% don't know their own name? You may have wandered into the wrong classroom OP.

Maybe their Boomer parents need to take a long hard look at their parenting then and the society they created, if they produced a generation of parents who can't parent.

maybe they haven’t had much practice with the coat recently as we’ve come out of summer

In the uk children go to nursery the September after they turn 3 (this is optional) the start reception age 5 (which is still mostly play based learning) they start year 1 school age 6.
So using my eldest as an example, she started nursery 3years 2 months (again this is optional) went into reception 4 years 2 months and turned 5 during the reception year.
But my youngest will start Nursery at nearly 4 because of where her birthday lands in the school year (September-September).

Also, I have drummed please and thank you into my ten and eight year olds since they were toddlers. They still need to be prompted sometimes (although the older one is much better than the younger). It drives me mad!

And the nervousness... theres no pushing or encouraging children to be independent because parents are terrified of their children being scared/failing (at best) or being harmed (st worst).
So things that 20nysads ago woild have been totally normal aren't happening. Whether thats learning to take a bus, go into a shop etc. We see on here all the time - parents too scared to let their children go into a bathroom or changing room alone. Or a child who isnt allowed to go into the corner shop alone, never mind walk there. These same parents are so busy protecting their children from any risks they aren't teaching them how to manage when things go wrong. Ditto, protecting them from any struggles so they donf actually learn the things they need to learn because its "hard" and the parent doesn't want them upset.

Society has changed though, if something happens to a 10 yrs old unattended there will be millions of comments along the line of “I wouldn’t let my dc walk to school”, “I don’t allow sleepovers”, etc.

Full time working parents have always been a thing though. I’m GenX and both of my parents worked

My friend is a ta in reception and was moaning similarly yesterday, she’s in ne England. Her bugbear is that simply are walking away when she’s talking, it’s like they haven’t been parented at all. Most her class have been in childcare but typically with childminders who are generally cheaper as it’s not a wealthy area

@Posywosey the OP has already stated she is talking about a school in a middle class area.

My child’s (state school) reception class seem reasonably self sufficient. They were expected on Day 1 to be able to recognise their name so they could put their book bag away. There is a high proportion of summer borns as well.

However the bulk graduated from the attached school preschool so I think this has helped them a lot. Traditional preschool is massively underrated for small children.

This! Parents are so time-poor these days. First thing in the morning when everyone is trying to rush out of the door, it would definitely be easier to just put the coat on the child. End of the day, there's very little time from getting home to the child going to bed, and of course everyone is tired by then. Some parents are working as much overtime as possible, or even multiple jobs to try to make ends meet, which adds stress to the tiredness. Not everyone has family support, and many have grandparents who are still working themselves because they can't afford to retire, so they can't help even if they want to.
Yes screen addiction is an issue, but we can't ignore the fact that parents have less time than ever with their children to try to teach these things. It's only going to get worse without major societal shifts back towards one full-time wage (or two part-time wages) being enough to support a family.

Yes. All it shows is that the education systems has got better at box ticking and making itself look better when the reality is children are being failed from start to finish.

YANBU. Parents are shit these days