I'll try to cut this short.
Daughter is 20 and been wanting to move out for ages (without encouragement from me, I must add). We get on well and have a normal and healthy relationship and she has heart condition which is well managed but waiting for surgery. Because of this she only works part time.
Due to cicumstances we've moved around a lot and we found a rented house 18 months ago which we're settled in. After this I met my current partner who I've been with nearly a year and I'm very happy with. I see a future with him 100%. My daughter has said she likes my partner and they always seem to have a laugh together.
My partner wants to sell his house in Spring and for us to move in together in a new one. He also wants my daughter to move with us and so do I.
Myself and daughter have discussed this a few times and she says she doesn't want to move in with us, she wants her first place to be independent of us, plus she's sick of moving that many times, that she doesn't want to move out then have to move again.
She wants me to wait a few years to move out of our current rented place so she can save for her own place. Yet she says that she could house share or possibly house share with her dad.
YABU - She has a heart condition and you need to make allowances and let her live with you while she saves up and has her heart op.
YANBU - You're not being unfair in wanting to think of yourself and encouraging her to live independently.
Note, obviously title should say 'not' sure, can't change it!