AIBU to utterly despise someone based on one comment they made?

I wouldn’t say despised but I’ve certainly gone right off people. Only the other day I was in a taxi with a chatty driver, we got talking about various things, he was actually pretty funny. Then he made a remark about young women wearing next to nothing along the “they’re asking for it” line of reasoning and I concluded he was just a dickhead with occasional good banter.

Had a catch up with two old work colleagues a couple of months ago. In the course of the conversation one of them said she had been to the 'Pxxx shop' on the way there. Aghast, I said "What did you say? What type of shop?" I heard it very clearly but wanted to make her squirm on repeating it. She giggled and said "Asian shop" so I told her how sickening and offensive that was, then upped and left. She apologised half-heartedly as I was leaving but I went home and blocked her on everything. Hope she was ashamed / chastened but I doubt it.

"in the nicest way (then predictably proceeds to be the exact antithesis of 'nice')

hence, why it was phrased 'the nicest way' not 'to be nice...'

"a simultaneously sudden loss of life and global sense of safety that has had huge ripple effects. It was a horrific watershed moment on so many levels and nothing had ever been witnessed like that before"

I guess you didn't pay attention in history class. Think my grandad would take issue with your never been witnessed like that before comment. I'm sure he could name one small event.

9/11. TV on most of the day updating etc. Naturally, because it was a news programme on all day, it was repetitive. He moaned about the repetition.
When the early evening news came on and obviously it was the first big story my partner at the time said “They’re spoiling it now, keep showing it over and over” I said (something like) “Spoiling what? The thrill and excitement of seeing thousands people die in horrific circumstances?”

Why didn’t you ask him what he meant instead of assuming?

Most people don’t want to watch real life violent deaths over and over on the telly. It’s traumatising to keep repeating those images. Why did you need the TV on all day? Why did you call his complaints ‘moaning’? It sounds like he would have preferred not to watch thousands of people die on repeat all day long.,.,

The reason the channels repeat the news is for anyone who is tuning in that is just finding out.

Why were you wanting to watch it on repeat? Why did your mind associate thrills and excitement as linked to watching 9/11 crashes and the towers falling?

"in the nicest way (then predictably proceeds to be the exact antithesis of 'nice')

hence, why it was phrased 'the nicest way' not 'to be nice...'

"a simultaneously sudden loss of life and global sense of safety that has had huge ripple effects. It was a horrific watershed moment on so many levels and nothing had ever been witnessed like that before"

I guess you didn't pay attention in history class. Think my grandad would take issue with your never been witnessed like that before comment. I'm sure he could name one small event.

9/11. TV on most of the day updating etc. Naturally, because it was a news programme on all day, it was repetitive. He moaned about the repetition.
When the early evening news came on and obviously it was the first big story my partner at the time said “They’re spoiling it now, keep showing it over and over” I said (something like) “Spoiling what? The thrill and excitement of seeing thousands people die in horrific circumstances?”

Why didn’t you ask him what he meant instead of assuming?

Most people don’t want to watch real life violent deaths over and over on the telly. It’s traumatising to keep repeating those images. Why did you need the TV on all day? Why did you call his complaints ‘moaning’? It sounds like he would have preferred not to watch thousands of people die on repeat all day long.,.,

The reason the channels repeat the news is for anyone who is tuning in that is just finding out.

Why were you wanting to watch it on repeat? Why did your mind associate thrills and excitement as linked to watching 9/11 crashes and the towers falling?

There was a similar thread a couple of years ago but it quickly sank into posters arguing and correcting grammar so it quickly became very boring…
So, here’s mine, triggered by 9/11 memories:
9/11. TV on most of the day updating etc. Naturally, because it was a news programme on all day, it was repetitive. He moaned about the repetition.
When the early evening news came on and obviously it was the first big story my partner at the time said “They’re spoiling it now, keep showing it over and over”
I said (something like) “Spoiling what? The thrill and excitement of seeing thousands people die in horrific circumstances?”
I despised him from that moment.

1. For not recognising that a TV news channel is repetitive and not everyone is watching it all day.
2. For using the word ‘spoil’ under such circumstances, as if watching it was some sort of entertainment.

Or possibly that small happening, the Biafran famine? You should have said those who have total western heritage. Many of us have connections to Africa and 3000 dead is par for the course. Although I recognise the fear of WW3 and what target was next. As said, the Nepal floods will have as many casualties. We rely on Africa/India etc for everything. War in Sudan? Never mind. War in Ukraine? Millions promised and let's get them over here. Humanitarian crisis in the Congo, looks the other way.

I think 9/11 is a generational thing. If you were late teens to early thirties when it happened it really hit you badly. Not just the event itself but its implications. Was this the beginning of WW3? Apart from Pearl Harbor, which did push the United States into WW2, the US had never been so attacked on its own soil before.

It was a scary time and we thought the world might change forever. In some ways it did. The Cold War had just been declared over and now this Islamic Terrorism threat was going to take its place, apparently. There had been rumblings of it with the Gulf War but not really.

Perhaps incidentally, 9/11 was kind of the start of the digital age. It was the first world event covered by rolling 24 hour news, the first time you got told something really important via your mobile phone.

Possibly, the great generational event that late teens to thirty year olds today will talk about is Covid. Of course, it affected everybody's lives but your late teens and twenties are your planning for the future years. The should be happy time when everything is possible. Things to do, people to meet.

It's almost as if for some reason, whoever runs the world likes to put a spanner in the works every twenty five years or so just so everything doesn't get too out of hand with peace, prosperity and goodwill to all men.

I'm not sure what the generational blight of the 60's/70's was. I wasn't around. Vietnam? The Day JFK Was Shot?

Certainly before that was WW2, then before that, WW1. I wasn't around for them either but they were far enough in the past to be taught about in school and talked about by parents and grandparents.

Just musings really and of course there's people who breeze through life and don't really reflect too deeply on world events, have private problems that take occupy them much more immediately or live in countries or are in social groups where or in which their lives are punctuated by different politics and concerns.

Also, history isn't really in such neat chunks of 25 years starting from a clear Year Zero so I'll stop now.

Erm probably because it’s Sept 11th and for those of use who lived through 9/11, the day is ingrained in our memory.

How are you still thinking about this 25 years later?

I should have added: has anyone had similar experiences?