Dh angry I don't sweep up the leaves every day

The NHS was set up to support people 'cradle to grave' there is a cross over to care as without it people would access NHS more. Ie Dorris needs help to get to the toilet otherwise she might fall and fracture her hip needing a hospital admission.

Child care wasn't set up in the way apart from child benefits.

The point of the thread by OP really isn't even about leaf management but how her DH is being a lazy arse man child who finishes work at 4.30!

How does this actually work? Does t it just blow leaves to another part of the garden ?

OP just leave the leaves alone! He can huff and puff as much as he wants. Give him the side eye and walk away. He will eventually get the message that's it's his job.

Get a leaf blower it does get quite addictive

Feels entitled to your labour🙄
To command that of you🚩

Or people can just put 😆..

Can you imagine the impact on society if all that free labour was suddenly withdrawn?

Those are such interesting points @Aboiledfrogturnedzombie. I wonder how much it would cost to outsource all that labour (childminder/cleaner/ironing service) over the cost of a week, or month. Not sure how many DC the OP has. It's similar to how carers view themselves - they receive £80 a week and save the state a fortune, because care as in 'paid care' costs a king's ransom.

I'll be pining fir each joke! I am evergreen with jealousy at your talent.

PLEASE read Eve Rodesky - Fair Play.

You have to stop saying you only work 12 hours. Sounds like you work a lot more hours than that. And a lot more hours than him?

How much time do you both get for hobbies, watching TV etc. is it equal?

May be tidy the leaves and put them on his side of the bedroom. Tidy his clothes etc and put them on the lawn.

NB this is not good advice. But it would make the point that you clean up the mess that HE makes out of choice. Now he expecting you to clean up after a bloody tree as well.

She is NOT working very part time.

We have to fight this internalised misogyny.

Women have been historically forced into domestic work. We were not allowed to earn money or own property. We were seen as inferior. So the work that we historically took on (child rearing, house keeping, laundry, cooking, meal planning etc) has been seen as unimportant and inferior while the big important man with his big important job was seen as superior.

When women went on strike it was very evident that this unpaid, unrecognised labour is actually important and valuable. If we employed cleaners, nanny’s, house keepers, cooks etc that would come with a financial cost. Women often end up providing all this for free.

The OP performs all those functions and works in a paid role part time.

She does not work very part time - she probably works much longer hours than his paid role. My bet would be he has far more leisure time than her. If she worked in a paid role for more hours then he would have to do more of those unpaid functions or they would have to outsource it. Because it all needs doing.

Leaf clearing is not a normal daily task for most households

Different when you have a plastic lawn though I’m sure, especially in autumn. Though every few days might still be okay?

OP should really have put the detail that her lawn is a fake one rather than a grass one in her OP. It’s in a later post but people keep missing it and it makes a difference.

Leaf clearing is not a normal daily task for most households, any obsessions individuals have for a particular task belong firmly with that person - completely unreasonable to expect you to carry out the labour relating to his obsession.

Suggest he buys a leaf blower then he can just blow them off lawn into a pile then scoop them up or a garden hoover and suck them all up. Either that or do away with the tree, problem solved.

I mean - I think your DH is being a dick and should do more but buy him one of these for Christmas and let him crack on

it’s a leaf hoover ! Shreds the leaves too - not sure what country you are in so here is the German one

www.stihl.co.uk/en/p/leaf-blowers-blowers-vacuum-shredders-sha-56-cordless-vacuum-shredder-ak-system-137684#sha-56-cordless-vacuum-shredder-tool-only-137684

I audibly cackled 😂

As other posters have said, it sounds like he is resentful about something else. Is he working particularly long hours in a stressful job while you have all day at home with the children at school? That could be causing some resentment, especially if there are money concerns while you are working very part time. Maybe he’s a bad communicator and isn’t managing to express his feelings about something else…

The best comment I have EVER read on MN 😂😂😂

No. You work many more hours than that.

If you didn’t do everything you do he would have to outsource it. So how much would a nanny, cook, cleaner, house keeper cost?

So he works and does a bit of gardening.

Read ‘Fair Play’ by Eve Rodesky. You should both have the same amount of self care and leisure time.

Stop with the internalised misogyny. Your labour allows him to raise children, live in a clean, tidy house, wear clean clothes, eat good food and enjoy his leisure time. Don’t allow him to diminish the value you bring. Just because you are not paid for your labour doesn’t make it less valuable. Imagine if everyone that provided those services for free (caring, cleaning, cooking, shopping, planning, etc) just suddenly stopped. Things would fall apart. Don’t devalue yourself and don’t let him either.

He sounds like a fucking nut job, love

Tell him leaves left to rot down make leaf mould which is excellent for the garden. Also tell him to chill and stop stropping about something as insignificant as leaves lying on the garden - there are far more things to be worrying about in this world of ours - leaves are the least of our worries. He really needs to calm down and stop worrying about something that nature deals with pretty well.

He's inventing a chore! They should be left to break down and nourish the soil the tree is growing in. What a pillock. I suppose sweeping the main path up to the front door is beneficial to avoid slipping accidents. But sweeping a small path isn't exactly a big deal. Trees and leaves predate humans, let them be.

I think a lot of posters have missed the bit where the OP said that their grass is artificial. If the leaves are left on that type of lawn they'll just rot into the grass and could go mouldy in wet weather. It's much easier to pick them up before they start to break down and get mushed into the artificial grass strands.

The collected leaves shouldn't be thrown in the bin though!

OP, have you spoken to your DH about his grumbling?

Thank you! That wood be interesting as a distant prospect!