AIBU to think most people have something sweet after dinner daily?

Yep..... I've tried that..read all the science.... then quickly realised that often, only many squares of the bad for you ultra sweet fruit and nut bar truly hit the spot! Such a shame......

No, crisps aren't particularly high in saturated fat or salt. The packet I just ate had 0.6g of saturated fat and salt 0.22g which is well below max recommend daily amounts. Obviously very processed food not great but I eat very little for my main meals. Everyone eats some. I am not young (nearly 60) and my LDL cholesterol, blood pressure and weight have always been very good.

No - getting diseases isn’t inevitable of course, but the risks increase with age and less healthy lifestyles.

There is lots of scientific evidence connecting highly processed foods to various diseases. Crisps are fried in industrial processes that produce chemicals linked to various nasty cancers. Crisps are often high in saturated fat = high cholesterol and salt= kidney issues. You can choose slightly healthier versions, but basically they’re pretty bad news if eaten too often.

They’re so nice with wine - if I have crisps I fancy a glass of wine and if I have wine, it’s a waste without crisps.

If you’re young, you’ll probably get away with it. I never gained an ounce or had any health issues until menopause. Enjoy yourself until then. I try to restrict it to an occasional treat, but often it’s once a week. Mind you, I’ve had to stop reading the news as between all the wars, supply chain disruption, and AI threats to human life, it’s tempting to just get out the champers and the Kettle chips!

Why? I eat crisps most days and don't have those problems.

But couldn’t eat crisps everyday as certain would end in me getting kidney stones or heart disease or something equally nasty.

I think loads of people are more savoury. My downfall is crisps. Love them 😬

This is normal in lots of households. All I know.

Mind you during Covid I taught myself to bake and once a week on my half day would make a different cake to share with husband and studying teens for afternoon cake and coffee. But everyday puddings, choc, sweets etc no. Never done that.

Your palate adjusts. When I have tried milk chocolate again,!it tastes far too sweet to me now.

Try marks& Spencer dark chocolate bar with raspberry. Gorgeous. I can’t have milk so it’s my best treat. But actually I’d love it anyway.

I used to but I was told to stop by the doc as I have high cholesterol. I eat fruit instead.
My DP always has a dessert, he likes ice-cream, apple crumble, eve's pudding, rice pudding, chocolate trifle.

I did this and I'm now diabetic.
Stupidity on my behalf.

One square of chocolate 🍫 is just torture 😂 and wouldn't the chocolate go stale before you ate it I'd rather have no chocolate than tease myself with one sad little square

I think the extra wait while you are hungry is the main thing though. I can do either or both and usually go with what everyone else eats.

If some of a group order a starter, it delays everyone's main. Those who don't want a starter have to wait longer to eat.

Some may be happy to stay and chat after a meal, but don't want a pudding so therefore the 'after the meal' is delayed which is the same as the 'before' being delayed other than they're no longer hungry.

It didn't bother me at all as I've said, but ideally I would have liked for us to not linger quite so long. I'd never become irked about it, my choice to not have anything else to eat. I don't have a sweet tooth at all I wouldn't have wandered off and left the group though, that looks selfish I think, or at least as if you're rushing them, breaking the group up, disapproving, bored etc which I was none of.
In my personal situation we were nowhere near any shops anyway.

If you go for a meal you generally know that some people will want starters, some won’t, some will want desserts, some won’t. It’s just standard. If you’re too hungry to wait while someone has a starter, have a snack before you go. It would be selfish to expect other people not to have a starter just because you don’t want one.

Well no, a non starter person still has to order their main course with everyone else. You don’t really know the timings of when the meal will arrive. If you don’t have dessert then it is different because you are finished.
I would say maybe if you don’t want to stay and chat after a meal then you should drive yourself.
If we have a meal in town with friends, it is quite common for the non dessert eaters to pop out to the shops for 10 mins. Some stay and chat.

It doesn't always work this way though does it? I mean, I didn't mind because I expected it and it isn't a big deal, but I went out for lunch yesterday and everyone got pudding other than me. I would have rather have left and got on with something else, but I wasn't the driver. The equivalent of 'You can just leave' is 'If you don't want a starter, arrive 20 mins later than me because I do want one'.

It's give and take really. I don't think either choice is selfish overall. If you're having a leisurely meal out, you allow for others who may want a starter when you don't, or a pudding, or a glass of wine/coffee etc.

Well if you have a starter, your main meal will take longer to come. Your friend will be waiting extra time while she is hungry. If your friend has a desert then this is usually while people are chatting, having coffee or finishing off their wine and you will not be hungry. If you don’t want to wait you can leave.

Why is me having a starter on my own any more selfish than you having dessert while I sit there ready to go, having to wait for you?

It comes down to consideration for others, you wait for me to have my starter, I wait for you to have dessert. Neither is more or less selfish than the other.

What I find to be selfish is pushing me to not have what I want because you dont want to wait for me.

@JustMeHello @SlugJam
I don’t know that is why I said if.
If you are in a hurry and someone is having desert you can always make your excuses and leave.

How do you know that the other people at that poster’s table don’t want starters though?

Huh? I didn't mention anything about insisting on a starter if other people don't want one. At least, I don't think I did. Op was asking about our preferences, and I gave mine.
It would also work the other way btw. If we ate in a group and one person insisted on a dessert then that could be seen as selfish, as everyone else has finished and needs to sit around waiting to leave. The thread wasn't about etiquette.

Tapas was made for people who like starters.
I always preferred a starter instead of a pudding but have recently discovered the pleasure of having pudding and hour or two after dinner.

Occasionally I get virtuous and decide to swap to dark chocolate. I last about a week before I leave half the pack and revert to the shit stuff. I realise it's the sugar I want, not the cocoa. That's just to make the sugar palatable.

You seriously think most people just eat fruit or honey or a "small piece of chocolate" most day?😂