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Original poster

To be furious with DP? 3yo has massive bruise after being left with him

61 replies

NegativeCloud · 09/09/2026 18:15

sorry this is a bit of a ramble

my 3 year old is in hospital at the minute after surgery. I’ve been here with him pretty much the whole time and went home for a bit earlier to shower and get some stuff etc.

I left him with his dad/my bf.

Apparently they went into the playroom and he’s fallen and now he’s got a HUGE bruise on his face. it’s really bad, like straight away you can see it and it’s swollen.

I asked what happened and he just said he fell over playing. I asked what he hit his face on and he couldn’t actually tell me properly?? Then he admitted he was on his phone when it happened.

I’m so angry I can’t even explain it. He’s 3, I know kids fall over and accidents happen but he’s in hospital after surgery. Surely you should be watching him properly?? Especially when I’ve literally had to leave him there with you because I needed to go home for a couple of hours.

And now I feel awful for leaving him.

The nurses have seen the bruise and are checking him obviously, I’m not ignoring it, but I’m sat here feeling sick about the whole thing.

I don’t even know if I’m being unreasonable because I’m so stressed and tired anyway.

I just can’t get past the fact he was on his phone while he was supposed to be looking after him.

Sorry this probably makes no sense.

OP posts:
LotsOfSmallThings · 09/09/2026 18:50

It does happen but it’s pretty shit that it happened in the very short time that he was under DP’s watch rather than yours. I’d be very unimpressed OP and would probably not be able to hide it under the circumstances. Is he usually rubbish or was it one of those things? If one of mine hurt themselves on OH’s watch I’d let it go because he is a good, present, involved dad and they are generally really safe with him - but if he was habitually useless and didn’t supervise them properly then yes, it would be incredibly annoying and upsetting if he couldn’t even manage to watch them adequately while they were in hospital and had just had surgery! If there’s ever a time to keep a closer eye you’d think that would be it.

Whisperwaves · 09/09/2026 18:44

Accidents happen. I get you are stressed but 3 year olds fall over all the time.

INeverReallyLovedYouAnyway · 09/09/2026 18:43

Ok it’s crap but don’t let people on here wind you up into a frenzy. He was careless and that’s annoying but it happens.

It’s a shit time for all of you. Horribly stressful. I hope your boy is ok x

NorthEastNancy · 09/09/2026 18:42

It happens op, kids can fall in the blink of an eye.

ds fell whilst i was videoing him when he was 3 or 4. He was dancing and did the "Mammy, Mammy - take my picture" then promptly fell and burst his lip. I was gutted but he was unfazed.

Also - not to be arsey but are you on your phone whilst at the hospital now?

BendingSpoons · 09/09/2026 18:40

Hmm it's lazy parenting, however 3yos do fall over even when you are watching them. He was in a play room, which arguably should be a safe space to explore.

Does your DP usually opt out of parenting or does he usually do a good job and just got slightly distracted?

Bitzee · 09/09/2026 18:38

It sounds like a really stressful time. I’m sorry he had to have surgery and I hope he’s covering well. No your partner should not have been on his phone. It’s a crap really that he couldn’t give an unwell 3YO is full attention. However, I doubt you can go as far as to say he could have prevented the fall. A 3YO isn’t always going to be within arms reach and if it was a split second thing then eyes and attention may not have been enough to prevent it. Personally I wouldn’t be angry or blame him but I would just be really disappointed.

TruffleSlinky · 09/09/2026 18:24

I hope he is feeling awful about it.

JoWilkinsonsno1fan · 09/09/2026 18:23

What an absolute prick/ waste of space he is!! I would be really mad too! I hope your little one is okay x

Grumpyoldcat · 09/09/2026 18:18

Dont trust him to look after him alone again.

Nofeckingway · 09/09/2026 18:18

I would be furious too OP. Fucking selfish behaviour. But don't let child see you upset it will stress him out more. Glad nurse is aware and will keep an eye on it . It might be a large bruise and look worse if he had any anticoagulant.

nutbrownhare15 · 09/09/2026 18:17

Your feelings are absolutely valid OP. I would be absolutely raging.