To think less of those who slept with a lot of people

Because that’s how long it takes to discover a lack of compatibility?

Oh no! How will I ever get over the fact that some random thinks less of me because I put it about a bit when I was younger?!!!
Get over yourself.

It’s not the number of people Bonnie Blue has had sex with that people judge I would think. But the way she goes about it.

It doesn’t have a bearing on who they are as a person. It has a bearing on their attitude towards sex but that’s about it.

I would never care enough to ask my partner how many people he had sex with. But I would object to him being a swinger solely because I have no interest in an open relationship.

What a very odd way to look at things OP

None of my business and I couldn’t care less the amount of people someone has slept with. I certainly wouldn’t want to be friends with someone so judgmental more than someone who’s had sex with many people!

I always remember one girl (she was only 17 like me at the time, but always seemed really wise) saying the danger is the more casual sex, the more likely you are to hurt someone or get hurt. There's always risk, and condoms apparently fail a lot. She'd never have judged someone, though.
Apart from the boasters, another thing I don't like is when someone says they can't be expected to be faithful because they're so used to having different people all the time. If they want to do that, they shouldn't be marrying and letting down their partner (ok, maybe someone will say I'm not a psychiatrist and sex addiction is real, but OP is asking about whether deep down we judge, and while I usually mind my own, I don't like people saying that).

People sleeping with ‘lots’ of people (what is ‘lots’ though? Subjective, surely) = not a problem and none of my business.

I don’t need to hear about it, though. I’d find it a bit pathetic if anyone (friend, boyfriend, whatever) started regaling me with tales of their conquests. Why are you telling me?!

Any guy that ever asked me how many people I’d slept with (there were a couple, many years ago) raised instant red flags and didn’t last long. Absolutely none of their business.

Nothing wrong with a bit of shagging about when you’re single (as long as you’re safe). Good clean fun and all that . No need to kiss and tell, though.

I voted not unreasonable.

There seems to have been a culture over the last 50 years that sex is a non-neutral act that anyone can enjoy and not be shamed for. I wouldn't shame people, but I definitely think less of them if they've slept around.

Disclaimer, I'm autistic and have only ever had one person I've been intimate with, my husband.

That's probably influencing my reasoning, but I am VERY low on the sociosexuality spectrum, so I don't understand sex without feelings.

Why do they need to have “achieved” anything from it? Why does everything need to be meaningful or worthy? Can’t it just be that they wanted to at the time and quite possibly enjoyed it?!

Excuse me.."are you a virgin"?.

Monty python.

Not particularly divided. Currently 71% think YABU.

What is a lot of partners? 5, 10, 20, 40 50+ and in how long a life?

I am finding a lot of the threads on this topic a bit bewildering. In all the long term partners I have had ( 2 marriages and a couple of long term boyfriends) I have had a conversation, at some point about previous sexual history. In none of them was it a problem that I had slept with more people than them, as I had in all cases.

I find this idea that your partner's sexual and romantic history is none of your business and vice versa astonishing. Obviously nobody owes anyone that information or all the details, but if a long term partner refused to share any of that information with me if I asked, though it would not necessarily be a dealbreaker, it would make me pause.

When I am in a relationship with someone and am in love, I want to know the other person and I want to feel known. Refusing to share any sexual history with a serious romantic partner says something about a person's openess and attitude to sex.

Then again I know I would not care if some had slept with lots of people, was bisexual or many other things . I would mind about some particular sexual preferences and kinks if they did not match mine but that is different as it might affect our future

As long as the person is open to monogamy - absolute non negotiable for me (so far)- , and they have tajen appropriate sexual health precautions, l really really don't care about how many partners they have slept with in the past.

This does not mean I am never jealous of previous partners, I definitely can be jealous of particular previous relationships, and have sometimes been unreaonably so in the past. I just dont care about the number and gender of past partners,it does not matter to me. How someone talk about their past sexual history does often matter though; talking about them as notches on a bedpost is something I do judge and I can only judge how they talk about their sexual history if I ask them about it.

I'd not heard of the sociosexuality spectrum before, but I've had a read. I suppose I'd be somewhere in the middle of the spectrum: never been interested in one night stands or similar, but have had sex fairly early in relationships.

I guess I don't really understand people at either end of the spectrum, but I don't judge people for being different than me. As you're very low on the spectrum, it makes sense that you don't understand people higher up, but why does that make you think less of them?

If it was a friend then I don’t really care, although I have noticed that women who sleep around tend to be the ones who have had a problematic childhood in some way. I don’t know about men as I haven’t had the same kind of longstanding friendships with promiscuous men.

I personally wouldn’t want a partner who’d had dozens of sexual partners.

Going to have to agree with the first few sentences of this.

While boastfulness in both sexes is contemptuous: with women in that it is often no achievement at all (for reasons I give in my prior post ), with men in that it is just crass and unpleasant.

With men, though, provided that they are not boastful pricks, a high number can be indicative of a man who is very attractive and just done what comes naturally to him and had the opportunity.

With women? No.
I guess it's down to biology.

Lemmy allegedly had a thousand women (but the great man himself did not disclose that number himself being a gent underneath it all) it was just an estimation by others.

That was one impressive dude.

I don't care. Other people's sex lives are none of my business. If by 'a lot' you mean like 100+ it probably just means they have been single a long time and have mainly casual encounters. Would you judge someone who told you they have had sex over 2000 times? Because that's about the average number of times people married 20+ years will have sex. So who has the most sexual experience then, who is the most 'used' a married woman who has sex with only her husband every day for 25 years and therefore has probably had sex approaching 10k times? Or a woman who has had 100 one night stands and no LTR therefore only having had sex maybe 100-200 times in her whole life?