School uniform rules - disregard or not?

I’ve no issue with kids pushing the boundaries of uniform (it’s what kids do - keep moving the boundaries and they will find something else to push against so uniform isn’t a bad one). They then have to take the consequences of whatever comes (although to the point of the thread, I’d likely deal with my child way more harshly and on top of what they school has done if they are likely to lose an amazing all expenses paid place). What I have issue with is the parents who don’t support the uniform policy and encourage kids not be bothered by it because it almost always goes hand in hand with other bad behaviour, don’t give a shit attitude by the kids and the parents towards the school which has a knock on effect to learning. That’s what we see at our school anyway.

Dd has just started at a grammar school and I amazed at how relaxed their uniform policy is compared to some of the other schools she looked at. They can wear nail varnish! There's no ridiculous rules about taking a coat off at the gates and PE trainers can be any colour. They need their blazers on unless it's hot, straight trousers, skirts seem to be a sensible length as far as teens go.

I'd much rather a school focus on learning and dealing with actual bad behaviour, not if someone has worn a waterproof coat past the front door. I always wonder if these strict policies are just to make a show about how strict the school is, not an indication that they can actually teach well.

Got boys so haven't had a makeup issue but I 100% agree with you. Ive bought the correct uniform which is available to them. If they choose not to wear it, in particular trainers, then they face the consequence and I will support the school. We often have 'but its a stupid rule' im not disputing that but it's still a rule . We didn't have a choice of schools for our foster kids.

Not make up because my child is 7, but I don't get why uniform is such a big issue, he goes in in correct uniform.

If it's not important what they wear why is it so important to wear something that isn't the uniform? If the rule is plain black coats find a plain black coat, it's not difficult. School uniform is cheaply available and there is now a limit on the more expensive branded items. There are plenty of jobs with uniforms, can I be a nurse, or police officer, prison officer, work in Tesco or Aldi and just say no I'm not wearing that?

It's just not a big deal to me. For society to work there will always be rules to conform to that we won't all always fully understand or agree with. I work in criminal justice and DH in MH/CJ and he used to work in the youth sector, so many of the children in the justice system were also those who didn't go to school, when they did they didn't wear the uniform, they and their parents thought the rules were stupid, that then seemed to extrapolate to other socially acceptable and legal behaviours, don't agree with them or it doesn't suit you, don't follow those rules do as you please.

Ultimately if you don't like a school's uniform rules you don't have to send your child there. There are just bigger concerns in my life than whether DS wants to wear brightly coloured trainers to school, the school says black shoes, he wears black shoes.

Yep, that’s what some parents at DDs school are like.

They want their child to stand out. They want people to know their daughter is considerably more clever than theirs and got in.

If all children went to school in black polos and jogging bottoms, how would we tell which ones were more special 🙄

It’s absolutely pathetic.

The only things I dont agree with is the fuss over socks. And blazers i don't think a teacher should have so much control that they can decide if the child can remove a blazer or not. Also I personally think children should be allowed to wear plain black trainers. So their feet are comfortable.

Even better I think secondary school should have similar uniform to primary jumper polo shirt skirt/trousers. I think secondary school uniform looks scruffy

Dont forget that some parents like the 'distinctive' uniforms of private schools. How else would their neighbours know their DCs are attending private school rather than mucking in at one of the local comps?

As an aside, when we had snow last winter the school was closed for two days.

They had home learning set up, and the girls had to be on camera at all times for the classes between 9am and 3:30pm, bar a couple of 15 min breaks and lunch.

They STILL had to be in full uniform.

So there was dd, in her bedroom, in full uniform and blazer and fucking ankle socks and yes, they did spot checks, randomly asking girls to stand up so they could ensure they had all the correct uniform on, at home.

Mine follow uniform rules because they don’t want the hassle and also don’t think detentions and then screen time bans at home as a result are worth it. It isn’t hard to put the correct clothing on each day.

Just go to school, wear the uniform, do the work. It’s really not that fucking hard, is it? Ooh mascara, isn’t she cool and rebellious 🙄 I went to an all girls grammar where your parents were called and you got sent home to change if you broke the rules - we all knew that would happen before we even started at the school. People rarely broke the rules. Just wear the uniform - it’s one less thing to think about in the morning.

No they can wear navy blue tights, or trousers - with ankle socks, and yes, they have sock spot checks, what a fucking waste of a teachers time IMO. Detentions because your socks are too long, come on.

I think some of the rules like that are fucking stupid. Then again, I think all school uniforms should be joggers and polo shirts so children are comfortable. My daughter’s uniform is so fussy and restrictive, all you see when you go in for events is girls constantly adjusting themselves for comfort and fidgeting with bits of it.

I really don’t think that ankle socks, black pencil cases, weird little neck ties and skirts and trousers with fussy pleats make children learn any better, and like a PP said, a population who blindly follow all rules is dangerous in the wrong hands.

But like I said, it’s those rules, or the shit comp down the road with metal detectors on the door as there’s a knife problem, so we suck it up.

I’m a teacher. Girls try to reapply make up in the classroom, and they take up space in busy toilets reapplying make up at break 2 hours after they put it on. I have to ask for mirrors away several times a day. I’d say at least once a week a girl asks to leave my room to go sort her lashes out (usually false ones to be fair) because they’re hurting or stinging her eyes. One of my lovely year 11s derailed my lesson yesterday because “her eyes were a bit red” and the rest of the class all needed to confirm that they were indeed red and had to check several times throughout the lesson if they were getting redder or not.
For the majority, make up doesn’t affect their education, but for enough it does.

Wearing mascara as a 12 year old is madness at any time never mind to school. I have some sympathy for things like not wearing a mandated blazer when it’s 35 degrees but mascara? Get over it

Do they can only wear ankle socks when it is snowing not tights?

That's an interesting perspective. Why would you want to have a child that followed daft meaningless rules such as no mascara? To what end? Because rules must be obeyed? An adult population who followed rules simply because authority told them to is a dangerous weapon in the wrong leader's hands. The purpose of school is to prepare children to become adults. I would prefer the vast majority of adults to be basically rule abiding folk, because most of our rules (laws) make sense, mostly because we live in a democracy. But if democracy ended tomorrow and a new set of unjust laws were passed (imagine a far right dictator gets into power) should we follow them like sheep? On a lesser scale, when I cross the road, the rule is to cross with the green man, but if it's 6am and there's no traffic, the rule makes no sense, so I'll ignore it.

Navigating life requires skills like critical thinking, assessing risk, independence of thought, understanding that nothing is black and white A little rule braking at school is good practice.

Absolutely.

I’ve always sent both my children dressed in the correct uniform with the rules obeyed.

I wouldn’t tell dd how to adhere to the sixth form dress code now but luckily she does it herself.

I don’t see why you’d not adhere to the rules you signed up to just because the school is a comprehensive (as both of my kids’ schools are).

We'd just need to have brainy, or talented kids

No one needs to wear mascara.
Just follow the uniform rules!

Reputations of elite schools are based not just on pupil discipline, but performance (acedemic/sporting/musically etc), the prestige of the parents, and how they provide additional financial value directly and indirectly.

There is the rule and there is what is done

Boris Johnson.

Yet his brother Jo is nothing like that.