DH wants to abort, I don’t

You replied to a 5 day old comment just to revive a debate about my opinions on contraception. You have replied to me twice since then, and others have too. I don't believe it's my job to shut up if nobody else will.

I really have no idea what your problem is but I won't be replying to you further. You've not come across well here at all, as pointed out by several other posters.

It’s only a few posts upthread that you told me to ‘have some class’ and let the thread lie, because OP has left it. Maybe try taking your own advice.

It's so clear how many posters are desperate to have the last word.
...Do you not see the irony here?

You've used the thread to have a go at her DH and then gone silent yourself
So now I've said too little? Can you even make your mind up, or am I just a random person to take your frustration out on?

You have said nothing that is remotely supportive to the OP
I was supportive in my initial comment. I also posted said comment before OP had spoken to her husband more and updated/requested that nobody speak badly about her DH. Many people said the same as me at that point in the thread. OP's understandable need for DH's support right now does not negate the fact that he handled this very poorly. Whatever the case, I hope both can heal.

It's so clear how many posters are desperate to have the last word.
...Do you not see the irony here?

You've used the thread to have a go at her DH and then gone silent yourself
So now I've said too little? Can you even make your mind up, or am I just a random person to take your frustration out on?

You have said nothing that is remotely supportive to the OP
I was supportive in my initial comment. I also posted said comment before OP had spoken to her husband more and updated/requested that nobody speak badly about her DH. Many people said the same as me at that point in the thread. OP's understandable need for DH's support right now does not negate the fact that he handled this very poorly. Whatever the case, I hope both can heal.

This is pretty hypocritical when you have said nothing that is remotely supportive to the OP, you've used the thread to have a go at her DH and then gone silent yourself. It's so clear how many posters are desperate to have the last word.

Grown women acting like children.

ThreadGuardDog

OtterlyAstounding

FriendlyMedusa

Just. Stop. Your views being aired do not trump the OPs trauma and pain and need for support. Take your argument into DMs if you must continue.

OP. I really hope you are no longer reading this thread. I am sending you strength and love. Be kind to yourself. May be ask for this thread to be deleted. But take a screen shot of your post where you list the things that influenced your decision in case you start doubting yourself. We will still be here if you need us. Try and take away the many posters that have been kind. May be post elsewhere on the site if you need us again. AIBU can be a harsh place but other areas are more gentle I find. Take really good care of yourself.

Shame on your DH for putting you through that traumatic and humiliating experience because he was too fucking lazy to submit his vasectomy forms. I'm actually enraged. He's an utter cunt.

I hope you recover soon.

No, because he vocally agrees that if I got pregnant in that scenario it would ultimately be my decision. A reality any man who has not had a vasectomy should face.

Can you have some class and let this thread lie now that OP has backed out of it?

No, because he vocally agrees that if I got pregnant in that scenario it would ultimately be my decision. A reality any man who has not had a vasectomy should face.

Can you have some class and let this thread lie now that OP has backed out of it?

Did you insist that your partner in that relationship had a vasectomy before you would have sex with him ?

You should be downright ashamed of yourself. Absolutely horrible, cruel and downright thoughtless right down to this one. Responding to such strong admonishment about it with 'Sorry but but but' is a joke.

I am allowed to reply, and your comment doesn't do anything for OP either.

I've been in a relationship while on the coil, and I accepted that there was always a small possibility of pregnancy just like OP did. It's her husband who apparently did not.

@Mumsnet having read the OPs latest post you should be thoroughly ashamed. She is leaving the thread due to some responses which were cruel and nasty. This, at a time a woman was faced with a hugely difficult decision and needed as much support as possible. I.know posts were reported and you failed to respond. Shameful.
To.those who couldn't resist being nasty i hope you never find yourselves in a desperate situation where you need help.snd support.

I have read all of OP's comments carefully, and I hope that she gets through this to a happier place very soon. She's made a very valid decision, as I've said, with many positives. Hopefully, soon she'll look back and feel that she made the best choice for her family.

But I do think it's wise to be mindful of how a man behaves towards you when things go wrong and you're vulnerable, and whether or not he shoulders responsibility. That's all. Couples' counselling sounds like a very good idea. But as pp have said repeatedly, I don't want to derail this when OP is hurting, so I won't be commenting again. Apologies.

I have read all of OP's comments carefully, and I hope that she gets through this to a happier place very soon. She's made a very valid decision, as I've said, with many positives. Hopefully, soon she'll look back and feel that she made the best choice for her family.

But I do think it's wise to be mindful of how a man behaves towards you when things go wrong and you're vulnerable, and whether or not he shoulders responsibility. That's all. Couples' counselling sounds like a very good idea. But as pp have said repeatedly, I don't want to derail this when OP is hurting, so I won't be commenting again. Apologies.

I have read all of OP's comments carefully, and I hope that she gets through this to a happier place very soon. She's made a very valid decision, as I've said, with many positives. Hopefully, soon she'll look back and feel that she made the best choice for her family.

But I do think it's wise to be mindful of how a man behaves towards you when things go wrong and you're vulnerable, and whether or not he shoulders responsibility. That's all. Couples' counselling sounds like a very good idea. But as pp have said repeatedly, I don't want to derail this when OP is hurting, so I won't be commenting again. Apologies.