Was I in the wrong or was DSis being a bridezilla?

A BDSM concept is that consent includes the consent of the audience. There's a limit about how much sexual conversation the staff working at the place should be expected to tolerate remembering they're at work and can't just leave (unlike elderly family members). Different workplaces will have different expectations and I expect places catering for pre wedding dinners are used to a certain level of explicit conversation but if they're using waiting staff under 18 you need to keep the conversations out of that topic.

Creepy as hell following someone to the loo to tell them to stop their conversation

You sound insane

Just to let you know older people also have sex.
They're unlikely to tell random dinner guests at the the dinner table about it... anal or otherwise... because they have more class.

If it had been a hen do.. I'd kind of expect to hear things like this.. At a welcome dinner for a wedding? Definitely not. YANBU

YANBU. I get why you said something to the bridesmaid and I probably would have too, but when your DSis told you she didn't appreciate it I think it would have been better to just apologise instead of trying to defend yourself. It's DSis's wedding, her friend and her relationships with family that it impacts (even if Aunt Delilah and Grandma Dorthy who overheard are your aunt and grandma too).

Your DSis sounds like she was just looking for an excuse to be off with you, though.

Sums it up. Who made you moderator of the conversations? Your sis is as much a drama queen as you, lol.

I don’t think you were unreasonable, there’s a time and a place for that sort of chat and a family wedding isn’t one of them. If it was being discussed openly in a workplace it could potentially be regarded as sexual harassment so why should you and your family have to suffer it.

Clearly it was thankless interfering and probably you would have been better off allowing your sister's low class friend reflect poorly on her and her wedding.

That your sister would be happy with such conversation being inflicted on her elderly relatives speaks volumes about her.

Let her off.

possibly, but I swear I didn’t work with her at the strip club! 😂

Was she a friend of Skidmark Lil?
I swear when I was young there was a stripper in town who had that nickname.

😂 she sounds like someone I used to work with - sticky Vicky!

I think it's funny when tradesmen etc swear because something's not going well, and then apologise.

My poor plumber had awful trouble plumbing in my new bath, called it "a cunt of thing" within my earshot, apologised and then roared with laughter when I said "No need to apologise, it's one of my favourite swearwords."

This.

Also, it takes aging to realise that the body may grow old, but the mind does not.
I get quite taken aback when people treat me like a senior; inside I am still a young woman. 😊

People often seem to forget that a lot of us olds were wild young things in the swinging sixties, and have remained broad-minded and open about sex.

I'm 71, and no-one's tried to stop me yet!

I think some people must think we olds never had sex, or only did it in the missionary position with the lights off.

I'm by no means elderly but I wouldn't want to hear that conversation at the dinner table either. BM sounds trashy. If you're going to discuss your sex life in such detail, then keep it for when you're on a girl's night out or in with friends.

My auntie would certainly have put her in her place!

To me, irrespective of the events, this is in no way Bridezilla behaviour or even in the 5 mile radius of such behaviour based on years on here.

The bridesmaid sounds gross, and, no, I don't think drink gives her license to make these remarks.

You were probably a bit overbearing; might have been better to pointedly steer the conversation to a different topic.

But your sister sounds REALLY unreasonable to hold a grudge over it like this! Is she often like this?

You followed her into the bathroom because you didn’t like an adult conversation amongst adults? That’s batshit behaviour. If there were children there you’d have been correct to intervene (at the time, not trailing her into the toilet). To take that upon yourself was overstepping. If someone else didn’t want to hear it they could have said something to her themselves.

This! Older people have seen and heard it all before, you acting like an outraged school ma’am achieves nothing.

The bridesmaid is an adult - what makes you think that you ca. tell her what she can and can’t say……..and following her to the loo to have a word with her????? Wow!

wait....was she talking about the bride????? That's really uncalled for.
I thought it was her own shenanigans that she was discussing?
as an oldie, i am not sure of the relevance of age to this but I don't think you were BU by saying something...maybe though it would have been easiert to address it more lightly and at the table?

It's not your place to tell grown adults what they can/can't talk about. It's also not for you to decide what other grown adults can hear!

I agree that she was inappropriate. But if it really bothered you, you could have I formed your sister and let her decide what to do as the person hosting the dinner.

DSis is wrong to drag it out, but you were a bit of a weirdo for going full prefect.

As an aside, my 76 year old mum told me it was very entertaining to overhear things she wouldn't normally be party to. Don't assume your elders are against piping hot tea or rude jokes!

I'm sure old people have heard things a lot worse.....I know I have.
This does remind me of years ago; I went to the pictures with my then boyfriend (now husband) to see the film 'Last Tango in Paris'. On the row behind us were a group of 5 or 6 elderly ladies.
The butter scene came on...it was pretty gross, and the ladies behind tutted and moaned about it for ages. They stayed till the end of the film though,.😊