AIBU to question preschool after inconsistent explanation for toddler's scratch?

The appropriate reaction would be to have said whoops, gone home and forgotten all about it.

I accidentally scratched my 4 year old today because he ran into me as I was turning round. I think you're massively overreacting tbh.

I have short nails and accidentally scratched my daughter last week. It was an accident. Accidents happen.

You sound much more upset than this incident justifies. Are you OK? Is there something else going on in your life which has upset you, or is there another reason you're not happy with the nursery? Does your DH have form for overreacting or "fuming"?

Have you never accidentally caught someone with your nail? I’ve got no nails and even I have!

I actually think the note was badly written. ‘Member of staff accidentally caught X with her nail when she turned around suddenly’ sounds different to ‘member of staff scratched child’. The note you got makes it sound intentional.

Inconsistencies are just likely because they haven’t spent very long discussing a small scratch. Nursery staff are in my experience so busy, they wouldn’t have had a meeting about it. Ring and ask the key person or manager tomorrow if you’re concerned but honestly this is small and she will likely get more bumps and possibly bites and scratches over the coming months

Not matter what I do with my nails, they are sharp. I keep them short and cut off the sharpest corners but the edge of them would hurt with a little pressure.

Your daughter bumped into a member of staff, she's a toddler so probably her face is at hand height. An unfortunate accident but please do not overreact.

Any type of nail can scratch skin. Have you never accidentally caught a child with your nail?
I have short natural nails and have occasionally scratched myself or a child just from having a slightly rough nail edge.

The explanation seems fine to me. To be honest it’s such a minor injury they probably didn’t feel it needed a more detail explanation- although I’m not sure what else they would have put anyway?

This happens ALL the time - it’s obviously an accident and the explanation makes perfect sense

My DD is 2 and she is always getting minor things like being bumped, scratched, falling sometimes involving other kids and other adults. It’s par for the course at nursery!

If you pull her out for this you’ll exhaust every nursery in your area by Christmas!

Good lord. What did I just read?! What on earth is your husband planning on doing in his scene. Maybe you should pull her out to protect what sounds like a decent nursery correctly following all safeguarding procedures from drama like this for the next few years.

In all seriousness, kindly - I get it’s horrible when they’re injured even in a minor way and it does provoke a visceral protective reaction that’s innate and uncontrolled but then you have to get a hold of yourself, appreciate that’s your parental instincts and not a rational response. Sounds like they followed due process and are very open. Unless there’s a drip feed coming they sound fine and i definitely wouldn’t pull my place over that.

The explanation seems quite clear to me?

They don't want to tell you the name of the specific adult because of this
My husband is fuming and I’m concerned he may try to cause a scene when we try to get a more thorough explanation of who this adult is and how my child ended up “walking” into her nail(s)

We moved house and on my son 's first day at the new secondary school they had a lockdown (not a drill) because a teacher thought they saw a kid with a knife (it wasnt).

I was very anxious and thought "what hellhole is this I've sent him to? " but it was just an unfortunate one off and the school has been great since.

These things happen.

I stood on a kid’s foot today, total accident, I apologised, it happens

Huge overreaction - children run into others -scratches, bumps and bruises are the norm.

And what does the report on the app say?

She walked into someone’s hand. There’s nothing inconsistent there, are you trying to imply someone deliberately attacked her?

Agree with all PP. This stuff happens, even in a really well-run nursery. They put it on the app immediately and told you at pick up. Probably the staff member you spoke to at pickup wasn’t the one who saw it happen so didn't know the details to tell you, which is why she directed you to the app.

I have a tiny scar on my face where I was cut by a lose screw on the side on my dad’s glasses when he picked me up for a cuddle when I was a baby. These things happen…

Just to add - how many suitable, decent nurseries are there in your area with availability? I would have thought you’d struggle to find many alternatives.

Yes I agree your overreacting. Shame it happened on her first day but these things do happen. I don’t see the explanations as different- they were lining the children up, DD turned round and walked into her nail. I would imagine she had her finger out stretched pointing at something or similar. The preschool absolutely should not be naming the person- an adult or a peer is all a parent should be told for a small incident like that. The only thing I would have expected the staff to say which they haven’t (or you haven’t mentioned it) is that they will remind the staff to ensure their nails are short.

I agree with everyone else, it’s an accident and these things happen.

I have stood on a child fingers before when they moved on the carpet just as I was walking by. Thankfully no injuries but I still felt bad even though it was a pure accident

This sort of thing happens all of the time. I don’t understand why you think that it ‘doesn’t add up’.

In accident reports, you never put names. You don’t say ‘James pushed Sam off the scooter’ or ‘Lucy ran in to Sandra when she was supposed to be lining up nicely to go to the toilet and Sandra’s fingernail scratched Lucy’s face’. You write ‘Lucy was moving and was accidentally scratched by an adult’.

I once scratched DD’s face badly and I don’t wear false nails - she turned round in the dark and ran towards me (we were actually outside nursery at pick up) and I put my hands out to catch her and she ran into my nail face first. She must have been younger than 2 because DS wasn’t born. It was a total accident - we both misjudged distance/velocity in the dark. It’s really easily done and I don’t think it’s grounds for taking a child out of nursery, especially as a first incident.

Tell me you are a complete overreacting first time parent without telling me.

OP you and your husband are in for a very bumpy ride if you are reacting like this already.

Very concerned? Fuming? Your hyperbolic language doesnt help either.

You are completely overreacting. It's a small, superficial scratch. They happen all the time.