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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to avoid private physio for daughter because I fancy the guy?

60 replies

Patheticcrush · 06/09/2026 19:13

My daughter has a health issue for which she has been receiving some physio. Unfortunately during that time I have developed quite a crush on the physical therapist. Thankfully, the free service came to an end which was a bit of a relief because I am married and so I believe is he. We said goodbye at the end of term and I went back to my life.

This happens to me from time to time, as I believe it does in many long-term relationships. I’ve never acted on any fleeting crush, love and fancy my husband, though we don’t have sex as much as we’d both like due to being really fucking tired.

Anyway I have some money set aside for private therapy for my daughter and he emailed me to say he was leaving the free health service and going freelance. He passed on his contact details.

I have not replied because I don’t want to be in the same room with him! It would feel like crossing a rubicon. But daughter would benefit from more physio and really liked him. I have to find someone else don’t I?

AIBU?

OP posts:
Patheticcrush · 06/09/2026 19:23

TrishM80 · 06/09/2026 19:23

Have you considered not thinking with your fanny for 5 seconds?

😂😂😂.

You’re probably right

OP posts:
TrishM80 · 06/09/2026 19:23

Have you considered not thinking with your fanny for 5 seconds?

GreenFootstool · 06/09/2026 19:23

Mooselander · 06/09/2026 19:21

YABU. It’s hard for people to click with therapists. I can’t believe you want to find another one because you can’t control yourself.

It's a physiotherapist - not a psychotherapy issue.

Franxi · 06/09/2026 19:23

If you can easily find a new physio then what’s the issue? I highly doubt he fancies you as otherwise he wouldn’t have contacted you. He’s a health professional and has a job to do, he wouldn’t risk professional misconduct over a mum taking a liking to him - your daughter is in the room for goodness sake!!

GreenFootstool · 06/09/2026 19:22

Just find a new physio and engage them for your daughter.

Drama over nothing.

Mooselander · 06/09/2026 19:21

YABU. It’s hard for people to click with therapists. I can’t believe you want to find another one because you can’t control yourself.

Patheticcrush · 06/09/2026 19:20

JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff · 06/09/2026 19:19

Are you kidding? You would genuinely disrupt necessary medical treatment for your daughter for this?

Sit outside the room, get someone else to take her, or just suck it up.

It’s not disrupted, it came to an end naturally, and I could find another physio very easily.

OP posts:
Patheticcrush · 06/09/2026 19:19

LittleGreenShoots · 06/09/2026 19:16

Crushes are absolutely normal in a marriage. I don't think your way of handling it is though? There is nothing from him to suggest he is being unprofessional. You should be able to do whatever is best for your daughter, including carrying on and putting your crush to one side.

Most people just enjoy them and it doesn't harm their marriage any.

Edited

I guess I felt a vibe was possibly developing and thought it was a good time for it to come to an end!

OP posts:
JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff · 06/09/2026 19:19

Are you kidding? You would genuinely disrupt necessary medical treatment for your daughter for this?

Sit outside the room, get someone else to take her, or just suck it up.

LittleGreenShoots · 06/09/2026 19:16

Crushes are absolutely normal in a marriage. I don't think your way of handling it is though? There is nothing from him to suggest he is being unprofessional. You should be able to do whatever is best for your daughter, including carrying on and putting your crush to one side.

Most people just enjoy them and it doesn't harm their marriage any.