Another selfish man thread

He's an embarrassment to be going to the gym instead of staying to help her elderly father do a job he doesn't appear to be capable of.

Any decent man with an ounce of self respect would stay and see can he be of help.
Basic manners and cop on IMO.

He's an embarrassment to be going to the gym instead of staying to help her elderly father do a job he doesn't appear to be capable of.

Any decent man with an ounce of self respect would stay and see can he be of help.
Basic manners and cop on IMO.

Reminds me of that scene in Detectorists where Lance is taking Maggie's mum to bingo because Tony (her partner) has football.

'Playing?' asks Lance.

'Nah, watching!' replies Tony.

If it makes you feel better, I've been going to gyms for 20 years. I've been to gyms all over Britain (I've lived in a few cities), everything from David Lloyd to the cheapest budget ones. I've never, ever seen this Greek god and goddess preening that non gym goers fantasise about.

Yes, some people have incredible bodies and sometimes wear stuff that shows it (super skimpy stuff is not common but when you do see it, it's almost always women), but you don't get a physique like that by preening in front of the mirror; you get it by putting in the work, which they're always doing. Most people are normal looking, plenty are overweight, and just there to work out. There must be some influencer types creating their content but they are a very small minority of overall gym goers and I've never actually seen anything more than a quick selfie at a machine. It's a profoundly unsexy environment actually. Yeah, we're sweating, but we aren't humping; we are too busy counting reps and checking heart rate. It's like park run with machines.

MN likes to talk about women "prancing" around naked in the changing room (always "prancing") but I've never seen this either. It's just women of all ages, shapes and sizes getting changed.

It's not some den of sin. If it were, I'd pay the extra for Gold membership.

The twins are 7 or 8 for those who wanted to know.

Go to the gym and make twins, ☠️

I miss the laugh emoji

Wrong end of the stick - my objection is mainly to the preening bit, which I associate with men and gyms. Strangely, I am OK with married women going to gyms - I know, I know, double standard.

Lol. No, it is more like too much attention on me, myself, gym bro? It gives the wrong vibe? Same as a man with tattoos, too self-centred? I don't know.

Im 55 with 2 sets of twins under 5 yrs of age. My husband cant do DIY he actually cant do anything but go to the gym and make twins however when my neighbour comes over to do the DIY bits that I cant do on my own, my husband goes to the gym of falls asleep. But I know im married to a useless man so no point in asking him to hang around when the neighbour also knows how useless my OH is.

So even with twins its a curtain pole! Id understand your frustration if it was a big job, but not a curtain pole.

What a load of rubbish!

She wanted his support and asked if he could go to the gym later. She wasn't asking for him not to go at all. I'd postpone something if my DH asked, even if I didn't think it was particularly necessary, because I'm not selfish and his preferences are important to me.

So what? Why is her arbitrary preference more important than her husband’s? Seems really controlling to me to demand her husband be present for a job that will take her father, at the absolute most, ten minutes.

For no valid reason, so she doesn't get to dictate.

Is there a reason why you don't want your DH out of the house when your dad comes round? If not then I really can't see the issue. I managed to put up curtain poles on my own whilst looking after an 18 month old.

But the OP wasn't ok with it.

76

Well obviously she was, her Dad is coming round.

They're six.

I'm also not seeing the issue. Unless your Dad is one of those men who need an audience to, Oo and Ah, over every little job he does. Your gratitude should be enough. Sit your twins down and get them to make a thank you card. Or get a brass band in.

Of course parents can do stuff without their kids but they have to agree in advance so that they know the other parent will be ok to be around to look after them.

So the OP, her husband, the twins and her father all need to be present for the grand Putting Up a Curtain Pole ceremony?

Also, does that mean no parents are ever allowed to do anything without their kids, no nights out, no gym, no shopping? What an absolute bonkers view.

Also, missing the point. I doubt these twins are tiny people. The fact the OP refuses to divulge their age looks like they're about 16 and she just wants to complain about her husband when there's absolutely no need for him to be there.

Both you and your husband can't put up a curtain rod?

I don't see anything wrong with him going up the gym while your dad comes over to do a super easy job for you. It's a one person job.

No, if DH or I wanted to go out without the kids, we'd mention it in advance to make sure the other person was ok with it and agree the best time to go. So there wouldn't be any sudden announcement that one of us was 'just off to the gym'.

What an odd post. (And an odd attitude.) Must be stressful and exhausting living life like this, always so suspicious, and looking for the negative. Is your 'friend' actually you? 👀

My kids - boy and girl - both call me for DIY jobs. They know I will come and do it without a fuss. And I'm better at it