AIBU to expect my husband to complain about hair in food?

This

op is being controlling and horrible. He needs to stand up to her and she needs to let him decide how he acts and butt out

Yes, I'm beginning to wonder if it's one of those silly reverse threads.

You dictate, you go against your husband's wishes, you undermine, you walk out, you sulk, you walk out again and you still think your husband was wrong?
Controlling behaviour from you!

I wouldn't have apologised to you if I were him.

He was correct and also it had absolutely nothing to do with you.

You say you want him to stand up for himself more and I think he should start with standing up to you.

It is entirely his choice if he complains about this or not op. Not yours. He shouldn’t have called you that, that word is never acceptable, but it was never up to you.

This is up to your DH. It's fine for you to point out that you would have made a different decision but it's not fine for you to tell him what to do. He shouldn't have called you a bitch though.

His food and his choice.

Stop trying to control a grown adult.

He should have called you a bitch but I understand his frustation at being controlled.

He shouldn't have spoken to you like that, but you're wrong to try to bully him into standing up for himself! I wouldn't have complained either. It's a minor thing and I would have wanted to wait around while they remade a meal. It was completely his choice to complain or not, it didn't affect you in any way, so you shouldn't have made a scene.

If you want him to feel more confident, perhaps stop trying to push him around? It's up to him if he wants to complain about his meal. You were completely out of order to overrule him and call the waiter over.

I really hate people thinking they need to speak for me. I’m an adult and if I feel I need to say something, I will. Often I don’t. Maybe your DH feels the same. If he wasn’t bothered, why would it bother you? It wasn’t your food.

I would have done exactly what your DH did (well possibly left the hair on the table rather than on the floor). I genuinely wouldn’t be that bothered about a single hair and IMO it would spoil the meal far more to complain, wait for a replacement, cause an atmosphere, than to just pick it out and enjoy my food.

Sounds like you managed to cause an atmosphere anyway even though he wanted to let it go.

Meh, his food, his problem. If he doesn't want to complain about it, surely that's up to him?

It’s completely up to him, he doesn’t need to have a different personality type to the one he has just because you don’t like it, he’s fine being who he is. If you don’t like it that’s your problem, don’t try and control how he reacts to things in his own life, it’s controlling and unnecessary. You were rude.

he mentions he’s the one who paid and it was his food like that is in any way relevant.

It is relevant though? It's his choice. His food. Him paying. You didn't eat it. You didn't pay for it. It does not impact you in any way.

It might be slightly irritating, but he is a grown man and if he wants to complain he can.

To be honest, if he called you a bitch (albeit apologised afterwards) it sounds like he does pick his battles and has no issue standing up to you, which I suppose is rather telling in its own way.

Well its a bit gross, l would probably have wanted the meal replaced. But if he was happy l wouldnt have created an argument about it.