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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband opens blinds in baby’s room

212 replies

DownmarketSellingSunset · 06/09/2026 11:24

The baby only sleeps in there - nothing else. He insists on going in every morning to open the blinds and the shutters to let light in because it’s ‘unhealthy’ not to do it (I’ve asked what he means and he just says it is dull without the blinds open). They aren’t blackout blinds, just normal blinds, so there is plenty of light in there during the daytime.

But, I’m almost always the one that puts her down for a nap or bedtime. So every time I take her up I have to try and negotiate fiddly blinds with one hand, while being pinched and grabbed because she wants her milk and to go to sleep but won’t with the light streaming in.

so, AIBU to insist he stops bloody opening the blinds for no reason? He thinks I’m wildly over reacting and it’s fine to pull them down when I go in to put her down for a nap.

OP posts:
rainbowstardrops · 06/09/2026 13:41

I feel as if this is more than just closed blinds.

If it is literally about having to close some blinds then yabu.
My adult son still lives at home but is more often than not at his girlfriend’s house. I still go and open his blinds in the morning, open the window and then close them again at night! It would seem strange to me not to do so.

Reclamation · 06/09/2026 13:37

This sounds like the straw that has broken the camel’s back for you OP.

Mama2many73 · 06/09/2026 13:33

Every day id have the blinds and window open for at least 30 ins to let the 'room breathe' . Id happily have them shut after that, but an 'closed' room is nit healthy

Namechangewegovyjune26 · 06/09/2026 13:33

DownmarketSellingSunset · 06/09/2026 13:29

Yes. Many, many times. He doesn’t like them being shut during the day. It’s not that I’m a hermit or something - I have the back doors open all day at the moment and the blinds downstairs are opened as soon as I come down. It’s just the baby’s bedroom that I care about.

Show quote history

The solution is that you shout him to go up and close the blinds 10 mins before 16 mo needs a nap.

Or you just put her down for a mo.

I would open all blinds in the morning too, except during the heatwave when any in direct sun stayed shut.

SouthLondonMum22 · 06/09/2026 13:30

I don't understand why you can't just put the baby down for a minute whilst you close them?

Original poster
DownmarketSellingSunset · 06/09/2026 13:29

Duckiewasthefirstniceguy · 06/09/2026 13:25

Have you asked him to stop?

Show quote history

Yes. Many, many times. He doesn’t like them being shut during the day. It’s not that I’m a hermit or something - I have the back doors open all day at the moment and the blinds downstairs are opened as soon as I come down. It’s just the baby’s bedroom that I care about.

OP posts:
TheCabbageMerchant · 06/09/2026 13:29

Beachtastic · 06/09/2026 13:24

Could you not put the baby down and then close the blinds?

Seems like the logical solution.

FatMrsHoot · 06/09/2026 13:29

I would be interrupting whatever he's doing and telling him to go close the blinds before I take the baby up for a nap, every single time.

Personally I open the blinds and windows for air flow, but it's not my house.

Also you have bigger issues at play if he's not contributing to the household chores and leaving you to slave away.

Duckiewasthefirstniceguy · 06/09/2026 13:25

DownmarketSellingSunset · 06/09/2026 13:19

But, the room doesn’t smell. The window is open and it’s not musty. I still don’t understand the obsession with opening the blinds, just to leave a room and only go back in to shut them again, but there we are. People are all different and it’s clearly important to some people to do it!

Have you asked him to stop?

Beachtastic · 06/09/2026 13:24

Could you not put the baby down and then close the blinds?

YourWildAmberSloth · 06/09/2026 13:22

So if the real issue is that he isn't doing enough, you need to address that instead of focusing on the blinds. That's a battle that you will always lose, because he has a rational response for why the blinds should be opened. There is no rational reply to why he isn't helping to parent the children.

Didimum · 06/09/2026 13:22

DownmarketSellingSunset · 06/09/2026 13:19

But, the room doesn’t smell. The window is open and it’s not musty. I still don’t understand the obsession with opening the blinds, just to leave a room and only go back in to shut them again, but there we are. People are all different and it’s clearly important to some people to do it!

Airflow behind blinds, OP. It’s not that difficult.

Original poster
DownmarketSellingSunset · 06/09/2026 13:19

But, the room doesn’t smell. The window is open and it’s not musty. I still don’t understand the obsession with opening the blinds, just to leave a room and only go back in to shut them again, but there we are. People are all different and it’s clearly important to some people to do it!

OP posts:
LondonLass2026 · 06/09/2026 13:18

My neighbour who doesn't work has her living room and bedroom blinds shut all day, every day, and it looks horrible. I don't know how anyone can live like that.

I don't see what the fuss is about with your baby's room. What a lot of fuss about nothing.

Bogstandardname · 06/09/2026 13:17

It's hardly rocket science. You put the baby down, lower the blind and see to the baby afterwards.

Original poster
DownmarketSellingSunset · 06/09/2026 13:17

By the time I get up there the kids have been shouting and whinging all morning, and the baby (I say baby - she’s 16 months so not exactly a baby but they’ll probably be the baby and the toddler till they’re at middle school!) is pinching me and shouting for her milk because she’s tired.

So the blinds are just the final straw.

I’ve spent all morning today trying to catch up with the housework AND looking after the children because he’s been busy doing ‘his’ jobs so it’s more that he gets to do one thing at a time while I have to be the default parent, always. And when he does something that makes my life harder it drives me INSANE.

We’re not getting on badly at the moment but there’s a lot going on with a renovation, parents being ill and the standard pressures of having young children and both working wild hours. So I think I’m probably snapping a lot more easily than I usually would.

OP posts:
TempestTost · 06/09/2026 13:16

Sun is one of the best things to kill germs naturally. I like to open the blinds in the morning and also open the blankets do the light shines on the sheets.

YABU

ForCalmScroller · 06/09/2026 13:13

How about put the baby down, and then close the blinds? Not hard is it

ShitFacedShakespeare · 06/09/2026 13:13

Fattypantss · 06/09/2026 11:26

He’s a fucking idiot who is trying to make your life harder.

And the award for the most stereotypical Mumsnet answer goes to...

🤣🏆

HoppingPavlova · 06/09/2026 13:09

The blinds should be opened every morning AND the window opened for the room to air. Limits damp, dust mites etc.

Plus gets a baby in correct circadian rhythm so no need to shut the blind. Just make sure it’s a suitable temp, which may mean shutting window an hour before the nap or whatever. Even if you do choose (???) to shut the blind in the daytime, there’s zero need for one handed carry on. Put baby in cot, pull down blind, pick up baby, feed them. Worse case is they grizzle for 30 seconds, never hurt anyone.

Ohdearnotthisagain · 06/09/2026 13:07

How completely ridiculous, OP!

Of course the room should get some light and fresh air.

It is really not that hard to pop in and half close the blinds at some point before nap.

HeddaGarbled · 06/09/2026 13:06

I think this is one of those small things that couples who aren’t getting on very well at the moment get really obsessed and entrenched and enraged about, when they are avoiding facing up to the big issues. It’s like that “she divorced me for leaving my cup on the side” thing.

When you’re getting on better again (which I hope you will), this will just seem like a trivial irritation, of which there will be many throughout your marriage on both sides.

pilates · 06/09/2026 13:06

Agree over-reaction.

Go in open blinds and then pick up baby and put down.

It’s not that complicated.

TheEasterBunny3 · 06/09/2026 13:05

I open blinds in every room every morning and also open the windows for at least 30 minutes to air out the room (all year round regardless of weather, storms, snow etc). Its part of my usual routine and I like to air the house.

However, why cant he or you, go in and shut them before the baby's nap time if it is causing you issues?

Tryagain26 · 06/09/2026 13:05

I would open them too. A room that is always dark isn't healthy.
I don't understand your issue . When I put my children to sleep in the way I didn't close the curtains but if you have to have the room dark why don't you put her in the cot while you close them?