Aibu feeling uneasy about men taking little girls to the toilet in the womens toilet?

There’s always a conflict in these situations. Does a small child really decide they prefer to go in the ladies’ toilets? And if they do, then there are likely to be girls as well as women who don’t deserve to have some random man coming in - victims of abuse, religious reasons etc.

Its pretty sick that people are having to defend the rights of women and girls to not have the indignity of a random man being in their space.

What rule? Where is this " Rule " for us all to familiarise ourselves with it.

App users can't vote so im
or really bothered about that

I still wonder why this one child's discomfort trumps the women - and other children -
using the women's loos

If you care to look at the vote, it's currently 50/50 so it really isn't one child's preference trumping everyone else's.

Why does this one child's preferences trump other women and children's?

men have no right to be in a woman's space.

Why are you so vehemently defending women's rights but have no appreciation of girl's rights? My stance doesn't come from a "pick me" mentality, it's that I don't see in this scenario that an adult women's comfort takes precedence over that of a female child's. Women's rights don't start at adulthood, therefore if a young girl doesn't wish to use a mens toilet then she has every right to use a woman's, even if that requires her father to accompany her. What I would consider as vile is a young girl being made to use a mens toilet against her wishes as her father has been made to feel like he's some sort of deviant just for wanting to attend to his daughter in the toilet of her choice.

Well, presumably this man doesn’t let his pants down and pees in front of the eyes of the girls, so I would argue that a man accompanying his daughter to the women’s toilet is better than a man taking his daughter to the men’s toilet, if we discuss which option impacts young girls more.

Is it really vile to consider that there might be some exceptions to the rule, as there are to most rules?

E.g.

No males in women's toilets - unless it's a male cleaner.
No males in women's toilets - unless it's a boy under 8.

Etc.

(Not coming for you btw, just trying to explore my own thoughts on this!)

Eww no a man has no place in the womens toilets

I'm no terf, but they should be all over this!

I'm a bloke with 3 daughters, never did I need to go into ladies loo. When they were young enough to need somone with them they were young enough they didn't care about using the mens, all they wanted was a parent with them. They're not going to be traumatised seeing the back of a man stood at a urinal.

I think this whole movement is just coming across from America where it seems white men have no tolerance from being restricted from any space.

I haven't a problem with all toilets being mixed sex toilets if they were individually contained with a basin and opened into a public space. Which is what I understand family toilets to be. So I still don't understand the increased risk of family toilets?

Why are some women so keen to give away women's rights? So many "pick mes" here. Women who think it's okay to let "some" men in to our single sex spaces - or do you just say that you really don't care?

Vile.

Yet it then becomes a mixed sex use toilet. It is not a women’s toilet. And the result is the design has to change.

Do you take your proverbial hat off to all toilets becoming a mixed sex design?

Urinals are useful as they are space efficient and quick. It allows more sanitary space to be women. Women should have twice as many units as men for equality. The reason the ‘ladies’ has queues is men still have more than women. This is partly historical as toilets weren’t built for women. Then designers were men and didn’t realise the biological needs of women.

If a man shouts ahead that he is entering the toilet washroom with his daughter, I very much doubt men would want to expose himself to the dad.

‘Spending a penny’ is from when you had to put a penny in the lock for the toilet cubicle. Urinals were free to really try and encourage men not to urinate in the street. It was even corroding buildings it was such a problem.

See that's where we differ in our outlook. I think a decent father would want to take his daughter to the toilet that best suits her needs and preferences. If that's a women's toilet then I take my proverbial hat off to him.

there is no specific u.k. law that prevents a man from helping his daughter in a women’s toilet is I think the point the previous poster is making. You may dislike it and disapprove, but that isn’t law.

The "law of decency" should stop a man going in to a women's single sex space. A decent man would not do this.

What law prohibits a man taking his daughter into a woman's toilet? What's the risk in using an individual toilet that's designated for the use of families? I can see you are coming from a safety perspective, which I can understand, but there are other considerations such as what the child's preference would be.

Little girs shouldn't be exposed to male genetalia. If mens toilets were all cubicles I would understand your point. But there are literal adult dicks on display at the urinals. I would never mind if a dad was taking his little girl into the female toilets. Because there are cubicles and we use them with the doors closed

I didn’t say anything about speaking for anyone else. This is AIBU and the OP asked for opinions on men in womens toilets and that is my opinion. You are entitled to care about whatever you see fit. Personally I care far more about perfectly able bodied men feeling they should take their small daughters in to the ONE accessible toilet that is usually on offer for all the disabled people and those with access needs, than a man standing in an area where girls and women are gasp washing their hands because some women think all men are the boogey man. But you are free to think whatever you like.
Also, I wouldn’t care if a man was in a women’s changing room either as long as again it had cubicles that were lockable. communal changing rooms are just not for me regardless of if you are male, female, nonbinary or a space alien, i don’t want to be semi/fully naked in front of any strangers.

You are wrong. A man with a child should not be going into women’s toilets. Family toilets (??!) are not safer.

Ok I'm trying to think what my dad when I very very young to use the toilet. I know by the time I was 5 I went in the ladies alone with dad waiting outside but can't remember before that.

cool. but if kids don’t understand nuance how you gonna explain to her it’s wrong for men to be in my toilet. but i can go in their toilet with daddy or grandad or uncle steve? that creates nuance doesn’t it? particularly when it’s far more likely daddy or grandad or uncle steve is who she needs to worry about. So it doesn’t make sense to say all men in the women’s bathroom are wrong. maybe not leaving your kid alone in a public toilet until she’s old enough to understand about feeling unsafe is a better option than just blanket ‘men are bad in bathrooms’ (but fine in a police uniform apparently)’.

Because men’s toilets are vile and despite people saying on here you don’t see anything when men use a urinal, you do….

I used to work at a centre that had public toilets and even when I used to walk in to check on them when they were empty, the amount of blokes who would walk past the sign announcing there was female staff in there opening the fastening on their trousers whilst walking through the door before they had even reached a urinal/cubicle was pretty high.
Ive never had another woman ask me why my 6 year old son is using the ladies with me so I assume no one but you thinks I should be taking them into the men’s toilets as an adult female.

Yes, a man can decide to use a woman's toilet when he's taking his young daughter who needs his assistance. No law prohibits this.

This scenario isn't like the river crossing logic challenge. There's isn't an absolute correct choice in what you choose to do in this situation.

Many people that are opposed to this are mistaking their personal opinions and preferences for absolute truths.

The actual problem is due to poor infrastructure, more family toilets should be available.

I can't help but fear that arguments such as this are a distraction from greater issues that negatively impact women and their rights.