Aibu feeling uneasy about men taking little girls to the toilet in the womens toilet?

Why should a little girl go into the men's toilet. What woman would want that. I would prefer a dad to take his girls into the women's toilets and would get over myself.

But perfectly legal and perfectly ok for safeguarding to be a priority for the vast majority of women.

Frankly putting safeguarding second is the pinnacle of entitlement.

Right well then you need therapy if you think a 4 year old is some sort of threat or sexual deviant . I’ve never heard anything so ridiculous

Dads shouldn’t be taking their daughters into the women’s toilet. This appears to be a ‘what about’ argument. There seems to be a series of arguments people are trying out at the moment.

Others include: what about male cleaners, what about mums bringing boys into the toilets.

Male cleaners are cleaning the toilets. They have provisions in place - outer washroom door propped open with a sign etc . It’s not a highly sought after job and we need clean toilets. It also has to be safe for the cleaners, and cleaning can be done at antisocial hours. Cleaners sometimes work in pairs with a man and a woman.

Mums bringing young sons into toilets is obviously not the same as an adult man. A judge said the same in a recent case.

Accessible toilets can be used for anyone who has need of them. I would try and avoid encouraging them for adult + child use. This is because they are mixed sex, private and sound resistant. Any mixed sex private design is less safe for a vulnerable occupant as my research into real life incidents shows. Accessible toilets should be monitored as much as possible. They are supposed to be in high traffic, visible areas so people notice who is going in and out and how long they have spent in there. They are supposed to have working and reachable alarms. If you do use one, and the cord has been tied up, please ensure you untie it so anyone on the floor can attempt to pull it.

Occasionally I come across an accessible design in single sex accommodation that has the floor-to-door gaps and space above the door. These are really useful as they provide non ambulant people the dignity and safety of being in single sex toilets too. Many wheelchair users can transfer by themselves, but if they did need assistance or had a fall, they are not easy places to be trapped in (and the floor can be left in a disgusting state).

Tip: in single sex accommodation you may notice one toilet will have a handrail and an opening outwards door. This is called an ‘ambulant’ toilet and can be easier to use when you have a child with you.

You talking to
me or
micespiders?

From your viewpoint, everywhere is then a vulnerable place.

Religion shouldn't dictate toilet usage.
Religious believes should not come before a child.

Did you notice the name of the poster who originally said that and think that’s me?

And what about a man taking his daughter to swimming lessons in a facility where there are no family cubicles. What do you suggest they do then?

And that level of entitlement is a problem, it’s not a uni sex space.

Why is it ok for my little boys to go into the men's (when they were young enough that if I was with them I would take them into the ladies) but not little girls?

I thought you were asking him to leave?

I don't really feel that comfortable changing in a place that only has communal changing available with little boys running round whilst I'm entirely naked, no.

If the man in question is taking his young daughter to the toilet. It tells you he prioritises his daughter's needs over some the preference of some woman who he's never clapped eyes on before.

The safety of children trumps the discomfort of women who rarely come across fully clothed dads or young boys in the ladies as everybody is tucked away in their own cubicles.

My dad took us into the men's. I never saw any penises.
I did see one using a gender neutral loo when a man came out of a cubicle still zipping himself up.

Generally people don’t stare at the them the men are facing the urinal and peeing. I couldn’t give a toss if my son sees a load of vaginas and boobs in the woman’s changing room. He’s 4 and he already knows women have different bodies than men. What’s the difference .

I still don’t understand why exposing a little girl to multiple men who are partially undressed, and peeing is less traumatic than an adult woman seeing a fully clothed dad helping his little girl? Please explain why you think the adult woman is at more risk of psychological harm than the small girl being taken into the men’s toilets?

And makes his daughter aware that if a woman asks a man for privacy the man can deny that request, great life lesson eh

Weirdly enough my DH and I witnessed a man take his 6/7 year old daughter into a men’s toilet in a small cafe yesterday- the women’s was only a few metres away -it was my DH who commented that he found this really strange.

Good for you. Other women DO care and you don't get to consent on their behalf.
No men in women's spaces. No exceptions. Would you be just as happy if he did this in a women's changing room?

Ah wish I had your level of naivety, must be nice. Men are predators, women should be entitled to privacy. I give up when it’s women pushing for men to be in single sex spaces, is no one looking out for women these days? Creepy as hell a man thinking he should be in a female toilet - disgusting

I don't like seeing a load of nobs or even one that isn't my husband's.

Disabled people don’t matter sadly, threads like this make it clear.

as I said early in the thread disabled toilet facilties are shockingly bad in a lot of places anyway and more people using the only available toilet makes things even worse

Father in women's is moraly wrong.

If accessible doubles as baby change, or other family/unisex facilities are available, it is the obvious solution. Otherwise, men's toilet are the right place.

Yes, it tells you he doesn't want his daughter to piss herself.