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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is the trans kids trend over? Aibu to wonder what happened to the kids caught up in it in the 2010s?

333 replies

Hippodrome · Yesterday 07:28

As we know the period from the mid 10s to early 20s has been described as “woke 1” and is apparently “over”.
When I was at secondary school in the 2010s, there were four trans kids in my year group (3 FTMs and one mtf) the one mtf was autistic and in foster care. I was always nice to them and kept my views to myself but I’m wondering what’s going on with them now, they’ve completely dropped off the radar. None of them have social media accounts and no one else I went to school with had heard from them.

My daughter has just entered year 5 and doesn’t know any trans kids or even what one is, my neighbours teenage children don’t know any either and they’re the age I was when four classmates transitioned.

I know there’s a lot of teachers on mumsnet would this be your experience too?

Ive tried googling this but everyone seems to have moved on from it I think there may be a forgotten generation who’s lives have been ruined

OP posts:
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9
TheCountessofFitzdotterel · Yesterday 11:12

user91817161 · Yesterday 11:03

I work in health and I have no problem with provision of appropriately designed aids for whatever age group needs them - but the only YP I see in my area who use walking sticks invariably dress a certain way, have their hair a certain way, it’s very distinctive …is there a good reason why a particular health condition will only afflict people who look a certain way? It’s similar to being a goth or a New Romantic back in my youth.

I would flip it, rather than the health condition affecting mostly people with a certain look it doesn’t seem that hard to believe that people with health conditions are more likely to choose one subculture than another. If you have a difference like a disability you might well find you feel more at home among the blue haired woke kids than the sporty kids or (where I live) the Young Farmers.
plus it’s also possible that it’s another factor such as autism which correlates with particular health conditions.

Winederlust · Yesterday 11:10

Catza · Yesterday 09:13

But that may not be universal experience. Just something you decided to focus on to prove your point.
My school friend in the 90s was (is) trans. Yea, his hairline is receding but he is currently an officer in the reserve army, works in cyber security, runs a small business, travels the world, takes part in the mud runner annually and has a very happy marriage.

At what age did they transition? My bet is that they wouldn't have been given puberty blockers as a young teen back then.

MaturingCheeseball · Yesterday 11:10

There were a lot in dd’s year at school. They were all in a group at primary school (to be blunt, the “odd” kids) and then all became non- binary at secondary school. Dd said she thought they were loving having an identity, a special room at school, awards for mental health awareness - attention basically.

I also saw the Pride March in my local city. Well, apart from a few drag queens it was Spot the Gay Man. Or the Lesbian. It was 95% at least young women, many with sticks, in wheelchairs and dressed in their specific style.

TwinklyAmberSloth · Yesterday 11:06

Secretsquirrel2 · Yesterday 09:22

I really like your last paragraph. No one should be allowed to treat anyone differently in the name of religion.

Its totally misogynistic and needs to be banned.

I have nothing against religion whatsoever but any misogynistic practices need to be banned.

I worked in engineering and hated being treated differently because I am female. Its now banned to treat people differently in the world place but this needs to be for religion too.

And they also need to stop this selective application process too. 20 people applied to an engineering job. 2 female. They interviewed the two females and I males and then gave one of the females the job to increase their female engineer numbers. Ffs!! Give it to the person who was best for the job!

I dont want to be given opportunities because I'm female. I want them because I'm the best candidate!!

TorroFerney · Yesterday 11:05

TwinklyAmberSloth · Yesterday 09:17

@Hippodrome I was at school in the 80s and 90s. People assumed I was a boy. Very tall. Buzz cut hair. Studied "boy" subjects. I hated being a girl.

I would have no doubt been one of those kids pushed into changing gender with hormones.

But then I figured out that gender isn't important. It's based in stereotypes. Misogynistic crap. I learned to be comfortable just being me.

I'm a person. Human. We shouldn't have to live in a society where people are treated differently.

We should be stamping out misogynistic views rather than people feeling them have to change to belong.

Different should be seen as normal. Everyone is different. That's a good thing.

No religion or group should be permitted that treat men and women differently. Or any group that treats anyone of protected characteristics differently.

People should have to change to belong.

Yes I always think that as we evolve we should get less bothered about labels, but certain demographics seem very keen . It does or did seem for a while that if you didn't like dresses and make up then you were obviously in the wrong body - rather than just being a woman who didn't like dresses and make up which is more of a social conformity isn't it, not biological.

I saw a group of women on Instagram, short hair no make up all in their 50's and they were being asked were they male - err no I am what would have been called a tomboy.

BinturongsSmellOfPopcorn · Yesterday 11:05

AllJoyAndNoFun · Yesterday 07:57

Yeah I feel like non binary is more of a thing now, especially among girls. It also seems to be region, and, to an extent, school specific within areas- my friend’s dd is at a school in Kent where it’s super common whereas at my dc’s school there are literally none who present as trans or non binary ( similar size and demographic of the two schools otherwise and both schools allow all students to wear a “trouser and tie” or “skirt and blouse” uniform). The non binary girls I know basically look like Emo kids from the 90’s ( nothing new under the sun).

@EricTheHalfASleeve interesting- I guess the other thing is that essentially there’s currently a “backlog” of cases as legally changing gender not been around for that long. Will be interesting to know what the numbers are when that has gone through the system.

The GRA was 2004. There's no backlog after 22 years.

Secretsquirrel2 · Yesterday 11:04

Can I suggest that anyone interested in where the trans spike came from listen to the Dr Soh & Chloe Cole podcast.
This is a FTM de transion American person.
It was a game changer for me.

AD1509 · Yesterday 11:03

I think non binary is more on trend now. You still get to be alternative but don’t have to
commit in the same way as trans. I teach a lot
if 18-24 y olds and there’s many a they them. Having said that my 8 y old has a mtf trans kid in his class. Parents work with LQBTQ youths- which seems quite the conincidence.

user91817161 · Yesterday 11:03

HouseBee · Yesterday 10:36

Yes.
A thing.
Like the number of people who are chronically ill has increased since covid.
People diagnosed with POTS, a ‘side effect’ of catching covid. Which makes people feel dizzy, faint etc… (die to an inability to regulate blood pressure and HR btw)
The same POTS that can make you walk like you were drunk (loosing balance).
Yep, that must just be a trend. 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Oh btw, if you need mobility aid, esp as a young person, can you explain why it can’t be decorated? Colourful? Why it has to be gray, sad looking and associated with being elderly?

That is not a new trend unfortunately. It’s pure ableism.

I work in health and I have no problem with provision of appropriately designed aids for whatever age group needs them - but the only YP I see in my area who use walking sticks invariably dress a certain way, have their hair a certain way, it’s very distinctive …is there a good reason why a particular health condition will only afflict people who look a certain way? It’s similar to being a goth or a New Romantic back in my youth.

nolongersurprised · Yesterday 11:02

TicklishReader · Yesterday 10:57

Of course trans people still exist.

It's only a "trend" on MN and parts of Twitter (X).

Yes, for whatever reason there have always been cross dressing men.

nolongersurprised · Yesterday 11:01

TheBlueKoala · Yesterday 10:52

Look at the celebrity kids; Jennifer Lopez daughter now son, Angelina Jolies daughter now son, and that blond famous actress who had a son now daughter who models. Those are just a few. I hope there will be a backlash...

Shiloh Jolie never transitioned and was never transitioned by her parents. I remember interviews where Angelina said that she wanted to be called ‘John’ and wear the same clothes as her brothers, but it was presented as a cute quirk of Shiloh’s personality. It was a long time ago now.

BridgetYourFortyDaysAreUp · Yesterday 11:00

BridgetYourFortyDaysAreUp · Yesterday 10:55

KSCIE 2026, in force from 1 September, makes it quite clear that schools should not be mindlessly "supporting" this ideology for children in their care.

Some schools are already trying to get around the statutory guidance (enforceable under law) by adding "extra" guidance to their literature on KCSIE. (there's a thread on FWR about this, I'll see if I can find it)

Reminds me of Stonewall and their "getting ahead of the law" BS.

Here's the KCSIE thread:

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/5574190-secondary-school-policy-updates-post-kcsie-2026-with-regard-to-single-sex-spaces-trans-identifying-children-etc-have-you-seen-any

Secondary School Policy Updates post KCSIE 2026 with regard to single sex spaces, trans identifying children etc - have you seen any? | Mumsnet

Half curious, half it supports my case in Brighton - has anyone seen any at all anywhere?

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/5574190-secondary-school-policy-updates-post-kcsie-2026-with-regard-to-single-sex-spaces-trans-identifying-children-etc-have-you-seen-any

arcticduck · Yesterday 10:59

Shedmistress · Yesterday 08:27

It is not over. Just last week, the Good Law Project, who share a director with Mumsnet, offered to fund 24 kids with puberty blockers and potentially cross sex hormones for free, sourced through Anne Health, run by a non medic who herself gave her son puberty blockers and cross sex hormones and took him to Thailand on his 16th birthday to have his penis inverted. In fact her and her mother found it hilarious that his penis was so small at that stage the doctors did not have enough material to work with.

Personally I think a Mumsnet Director adovcating to mutilate and sterilise kids is not 'in the spirit' of any parenting forum but hey ho.

So yes, people are still raging about it all, many people think sterilising and mutilating kids because they like the wrong toys is a bad thing.

This is horrific!!

Kalanthe · Yesterday 10:59

It was a trend, same with being non-binary. It's sad because transsexual people have been born since the beginning of time, it's a legitimate medical condition and a great personal tragedy, cause of suffering. It got turned into a part of the culture war and a trend, so that the actual trans people weren't taken seriously anymore. Same with non-binary, some people are born with both sets of genitals (usually neither of them fully developed) and don't feel like either man or a woman. Again, a medical condition that has always existed. Then a bunch of teenage kids decided they didn't feel any gender that day and ridiculed the people who are genuinely intersex. I feel really sorry for all those trans and intersex people who had to suffer even more because of the trend

TopSecretSquirrel · Yesterday 10:59

The YouTuber Edge of the Matrix discusses transgender ideology by visiting towns and inviting the public to talk to him. My opinion is that he has carefully researched his opinions and talks from an educated position. It generates good (and often heated) debate amongst those that approach him.

In particular look for his videos with Philippa. She comes across as a lovely, balanced person who listens to opinions from others whilst explaining her life experience as someone who had previously transitioned to a man. In fact, her story gives one example to answer the OPs original question.

Worth a watch to hear debate from different perspectives.

moderate · Yesterday 10:58

AllJoyAndNoFun · Yesterday 07:57

Yeah I feel like non binary is more of a thing now, especially among girls. It also seems to be region, and, to an extent, school specific within areas- my friend’s dd is at a school in Kent where it’s super common whereas at my dc’s school there are literally none who present as trans or non binary ( similar size and demographic of the two schools otherwise and both schools allow all students to wear a “trouser and tie” or “skirt and blouse” uniform). The non binary girls I know basically look like Emo kids from the 90’s ( nothing new under the sun).

@EricTheHalfASleeve interesting- I guess the other thing is that essentially there’s currently a “backlog” of cases as legally changing gender not been around for that long. Will be interesting to know what the numbers are when that has gone through the system.

I suspect the variation between schools is down to whether it’s tolerated vs celebrated.

Maisymouse2 · Yesterday 10:58

Still going on and not a 'trend' as you call it.
I was surprise by a trans person I knew side stepping anytime i saw them until I said hello and got a big grin..it made my day
Be whoever you want to be...be a decent person is my motto.
My adult trans friend never bores me or is difficult unlike a friend with ocd whos hard bloody work and so quick to be offended at anything...trans any day than clean freak behaviour somehow seems more normal to me.
Bite!

TicklishReader · Yesterday 10:57

Of course trans people still exist.

It's only a "trend" on MN and parts of Twitter (X).

Anyahyacinth · Yesterday 10:55

Surely the decrease can be attributed to stigma, prejudice and isolation (the pile on from politicians etc).....so the feelings are still there but hidden. As they were in the past

BridgetYourFortyDaysAreUp · Yesterday 10:55

Toomuchtoooften · Yesterday 10:47

Schools really should refuse to support this gaslighting nonsense ( the rest of the children are gaslighted). I know one school that quite rightly did.

KSCIE 2026, in force from 1 September, makes it quite clear that schools should not be mindlessly "supporting" this ideology for children in their care.

Some schools are already trying to get around the statutory guidance (enforceable under law) by adding "extra" guidance to their literature on KCSIE. (there's a thread on FWR about this, I'll see if I can find it)

Reminds me of Stonewall and their "getting ahead of the law" BS.

BackToLurk · Yesterday 10:54

TheBlueKoala · Yesterday 10:52

Look at the celebrity kids; Jennifer Lopez daughter now son, Angelina Jolies daughter now son, and that blond famous actress who had a son now daughter who models. Those are just a few. I hope there will be a backlash...

I don’t think AJ’s child transitioned. Indeed I think she handled it in a very light-touch, let them just be an individual without labelling them type way.

Lentilcakes · Yesterday 10:53

HouseBee · Yesterday 10:11

@Lentilcakes , I know of one trans teen who transitioned during covid and yes I agree that time really affected them (on MH pov).

The others though are a few years pre covid.

Id be very careful to say ‘it’s all lockdowns’ because that trend existed much before that.

That is true, but pre-2016 I’d barely heard of trans barring the occasional trans woman working in my local John Lewis!

I was working in a school then (although not a teacher) and there was maybe 1-2 trans kids in a school of 1000 or so pupils. Now they’re legion (I still have friends who work there).

BackToLurk · Yesterday 10:52

researchers3 · Yesterday 10:14

They are likely not on SM due to the massive ignorance and prejudice from people like you.

I have two relatives who are trans. It's not a fad, nor a mental illness and one was born in the 70s abd the other has been trans for almost ten years.

They live their lives quietly and with dignity. HTH.

Its possible to believe that there are a tiny number of people who feel something we can call ‘gender dysphoria’ which causes them huge distress, which may be alleviated by ‘transitioning’ (although opinions will differ and may change) and also believe that there are larger number of, particularly young, particularly ND people who got caught up in a period of social contagion.

TheBlueKoala · Yesterday 10:52

Look at the celebrity kids; Jennifer Lopez daughter now son, Angelina Jolies daughter now son, and that blond famous actress who had a son now daughter who models. Those are just a few. I hope there will be a backlash...

JoustingContest · Yesterday 10:52

whatcanthematterbe81 · Yesterday 07:41

Crikey, you under a rock? It’s everywhere 😂. Go on the feminism board, they’re still raging

I think the reality is that it's taken such a hold on institutions, policy, the arts, media and polite discourse (ie what the media class deems is ok for the plebs to talk about) that it's going to take a long time to get this shitty ideology out-
That doesn't mean the trend isn't over- it's clearly lost a huge amount of traction, but there will be those clinging on- parents who've transed their kids- AGPs who need to wank into women's clothing in M&S and many of these are powerful people with big platforms (actors, for example- looking at you David Tennant, Olivia Colman et al and a variety of almost exclusively "progressive" politicians).
And thank god for the pushback from places like MN feminism board.