From this morning’s Times.
There is probably no scandal large enough to shake the Reform faithful's adoration of their Messiah. And how can you not have a good time when you're standing at a urinal and a man appears next to you in a magnificently elaborate crusader knight uniform? How do you even do it in full chain mail? Sadly, I found I lacked the courage to look for long enough and find out.
In the end, the leader's speech was almost two hours late and was not a security risk but it was rendered a shambles by a co-ordinated, staggered, series of shouty protesters, who were dragged out one by one.
The party had seen it coming. They even had a graphic ready to flash on the on-stage screens, each time the shouting started. “Boring”, it read, 20 times over, in foot-high letters.
He'd wisely prepared a list of pre-cooked putdowns, the best one being: “You're witnessing the benefits of a university eduation. What was it love, don't tell me, sociology?”
Eventually, Farage briefly addressed the scandal of the Channel 4 film. “The party has taken no illegal money,” he said, “that's important.” So that cleared that up then, at least for anyone out there who thought that an undercover reporter, pretending to be the son of an American billionaire had actually, really, given Nigel Farage half a milion quid.
Reform still likes to think of itself as an “insurgency” but Farage is the oldest show in town. It's almost impossible to count all the other party leaders who have come and gone while Farage has been doing his thing. He has absolutely nothing new to say and who can blame him?
In a slight break with tradition, the usual volley of fireworks did not go off when he arrived on stage, but instead when he left, presumably in search of a well-earned cigarette. It was appropriate enough. Reform Conference 2026 is a smoking ruin.