to leave ten year old twins in a cafe while I swim?

But why wouldn’t she leave them in a seating area?! They’re two 10 year olds not toddlers.

The OP has already explained that because of travel time they would be home alone for 3
times longer than if she left them in the cafe so it seems far more sensible to me to take them with her

Prize for the most ludicrous response on the thread so far! Unless you were being sarcastic, which I kind of hope you were....

I disagree..... ten year old brothers will behave in public but take chunks out of each other if they are at home out of sight and they fall out. Safer for them to be left in the cafe.

They aren’t toddlers so that seems fine to me. Take your watch/phone with you.

My point is if they are sensible enough to sit on their own in a cafe for half and hour then of course they are more than fine to be at home for 1 hour where they are much safer and probably happier!

But let’s be honest OP says she doesn’t expect staff to look after them but she is assuming they will keep an eye. What if there were no staff it was just a seating area would she be happy to leave them then? I doubt it.

What would be the issue if everyone did the same? The cafe would have lots of customers … not really seeing the problem.

I'm surprised at the answers here. I think that's fine. What's going to happen? Surely 10 year olds can swim so accidentally falling in the pool isn't a problem and it's really unlikely anyway.

No, I really wouldn’t do this. It’s unfair on the cafe staff and other customers. What if everyone did the same thing? Can you buddy up with others who swim in the same place and take turns to keep an eye on the children?

Do it . The longer this post goes on the more sensible responses are . Nothing wrong with it, just do it .

Christ, we’ve just returned from Asia where tiny kids were running around the town on their own in the evenings. Totally different attitude there and no dramas that we saw.

2 sensible 10 year olds should be absolutely fine for a short period of time.

They're not being 'dumped'. And leaving them on their own at home for getting on for an hour and half is not the same as letting them sit in a cafe on their own for half an hour. Two ten year olds should be fine for half an hour, and if they're not I doubt OP would be considering this.

I think the poster you quoted was being tongue-in-cheek!

Nope, you are not alone in that. I used to spend my Fridays unsupervised at the leisure centre along with most of my class! We walked 20 minutes there, swam, walked home via the chip shop. This was 2005-ish, so not exactly “the good old days”. I was 11 when this was going on.

Can’t tell if you are both being sarcastic. @Cherrytree86 obviously yes. @BlueMum16 I’m not sure.

This whole thread is classic Mumsnet craziness.

Even if they were fine at home, I'd be happier with them at the cafe.
The cafe, with the breakfast and the responsibility etc will be good for them. They can plan what games/activities to take with them. It's good for them to see their Mum do something for herself.
At home I think mine would just have watched tv or maybe felt a bit lonely.

I said upthread that my son accompanied me and entertained himself while I did sport things.

Don’t get the outrage? It’s an organised outdoor swim not a random lake.
There are two of them and they’re 10 not 3!
If they’re sensible I don’t see the problem.

What’s the difference between this and letting 10 year olds go to the playground or shop with a friend? Is it the swimming people have a problem with because I can’t understand why people wouldn’t let two ten year olds go for a drink in a cafe alone? Both my DDs would have been ok in this scenario when they were 10

It’s absolutely fine!

Age 10 is quite old enough for two kids to have brekkie in a cafe for 30mins.

People who say otherwise are absolute loons!

Does that including washing the car outside the house so not in direct supervision of the DC?

This is such a confusing comment. The fact that they can be left home alone means that they don't need childcare. Therefore no one in the cafe would be providing childcare, just like no one is providing childcare when they walk to the shops or go to the park on their own.

I'm wondering why you asked OP, as you already give your boys quite a lot of freedom, and you sound pretty convinced they'll manage.

I think that you know your kids. 10 is borderline, but I agree that they're safer together (I give my 3 and 4 year olds a lot more freedom when they're together for the same reason).

My immediate concern would be the proximity of the water, but if you're confident they cannot go anywhere near it then it's fine.

I'm wondering what the cafe management would say though. They might have an issue with it.

If they are safe to be left at the cafe then surely they are safe to be left at home instead ?

then you don’t have to think about the staff getting smoothed with you for using them as free childcare

As a teenager, my parents had to persuade me to do things by myself, such as catching trains, or even going to shops, because I was afraid of getting things wrong.

@BlueMum16

cleaning.

So what leisure/hobbies/sports are allowed for us Mum's?

Or it is just swimming you disagree with? If the OP was doing paddle boarding, knitting or choir would that be ok?

Sounds absolutely fine to me, if you’re confident they’ll behave ok. They’re ten, they’re old enough to walk home from school and go to the shop alone - I can’t believe people are acting like you’re proposing leaving a pair of three year olds unattended 😂