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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to feel put out by my daughter's changed school run request?

382 replies

Helcarlol · 03/09/2026 19:31

Hi all, so my DD has 2 DDs who are 2 and 4. Her eldest started primary 1 this year and last year my DD went back to work super part time as a peripatetic music instructor in schools. She works exclusively within school hours.
Last year she did 2 full days a week and I provided childcare on one and her MIL the other. This year she has opted to put her youngest in nursery for most of her hours and eldest is obviously in school.
She asked if on the two days where she starts earlier could I come over and walk the girls to school/nursery, I only live 10 minutes walk away and she is less than 10 to the school so I agreed, I don’t work those days anyway.

So far I’ve been going round for about 8, leaving with the girls around 8:30, DD leaves at the same time.

I also collect them one day a week but she is home for around 3:20 so I don’t have them for long.

This evening she has messaged me asking if tomorrow I can aim to arrive closer to 8:25/30, so she can just leave for work as soon as I arrive and I can leave to take the children to school. This has annoyed me, so far all I’ve been doing is helping with the girls getting ready, making myself a cup of tea etc, and I’ve enjoyed that little bit of extra time with them as otherwise I only see them once a week for 2 hours.

AIBU to think this is rude and unnecessary?

OP posts:
Original poster
Helcarlol · 03/09/2026 19:43

Sunshineclouds11 · 03/09/2026 19:40

School mornings are manic but as you’ve said you only see them for 2 hours otherwise.
could you possibly offer to have them longer after school? Make their tea, park etc

edit to add, I would bite my mams hand off for some help on a morning 😅

Edited

DD doesn’t want me to have them later, she says she prefers to have them home for dinner and family time.
I see them all once a week when DD hosts me for dinner for about 2 hours but otherwise just these mornings and the odd drop in if we are available.

OP posts:
Sunshineclouds11 · 03/09/2026 19:40

School mornings are manic but as you’ve said you only see them for 2 hours otherwise.
could you possibly offer to have them longer after school? Make their tea, park etc

edit to add, I would bite my mams hand off for some help on a morning 😅

PrincessofWills · 03/09/2026 19:40

Honestly I think dd is being very rude and if she's asking for favours, which is what this is, she needs to accept it suits op to spend time there before leaving. If not perhaps she should pay a stranger to do it.

beaglescurleduplikebagels · 03/09/2026 19:35

Honestly, it sounds like you're getting in the way. Why on earth are you faffing about making a cup of tea?

IDontDrinkTea · 03/09/2026 19:35

Gosh, someone else faffing about in my
kitchen making themselves drinks when I’m trying to get my kids ready for school would irritate me no end. I think I’m Team DD here

RVectensian · 03/09/2026 19:34

Do you see them outside of this arrangement?

I can see that in the morning before school is not the time for a chat, cup of tea etc. The calmer/quieter the better, fewer people to talk to etc.

It is up to you whether this suits you or not though obviously.

Grain80 · 03/09/2026 19:33

Mornings are hectic kids are in their routines … I would struggle … my mum lives far away and if she comes to stay she tends to keep out of the way on a school morning and leave us to it!