AIBU to still feel shaken after drunk men made vile comments on Wizz Air flight?

Just coming on to say I wouldn't have had a clue at the time how to handle this situation. It's nothing I can imagine having to handle. In hindsight, if nothing was going to come from it in terms if consequences, then making sure the impact on your daughter was as minimal as possible was the best outcome.

I wonder what those men would feel if it was their little sister or daughter in that situation.

Is it worth asking on social media if anyone else was on the flight / witnessed anything?

OP their behaviour was appalling, I'm so sorry that happened to you. Some vile men like to make rape 'jokes' as a power play and its a really nasty thing to do. I don't blame you for still being upset 💐

I don't know why OP is getting bashed for referring to the cabin crew as kids - she was speaking about her experience, not describing all cabin crew! It sounds like they were young and inexperienced and did not step in when they ought to have done - if the men were drunk and rowdy that will have been very obvious and isn't up to the OP to report it before anything is done. Cheapo airlines have a lower age limit of 18 for cabin crew so they could have been teenagers.

I think OPs point its that they seemed very young and inexperienced, which exacerbated the whole awful situation for her - she needed an authority figure to lean on and they didn't provide that.

If they can't control rowdy passengers, that is dangerous.

Sounds like the cabin crew should not have served them so much alcohol and maybe that's the angle to take with any complaint as that's a concrete action they could have taken but didn't, and is potentially serious.

I’d have done the same as you @morello1 try and get out of there assuming that the airline would know who they were.

wizz air sound anything but…also hoping it gets picked up, it’s vile.

Why did you not complain about their behaviour to cabin crew whilst in the air though? They were vile by the sounds of it, but I wonder why you were crying? That sounds a bit extreme. It’s not something I would complain to the police about - what crime do you think they committed - being obnoxious?

Omg that is so awful. How vile. What the hell is wrong with men. I completely despair. I'm so so sorry that happened to you. I think you handled it well and I dont think there's anything else you could have done given your daughter was there.

I think you keep pursuing it, that's all you can do.

Well done for protecting your daughter. I am honestly shocked. Did any other passengers hear?

as if there is not the means to identify passengers, what would happen were there a crash

Seat plans might be of limited use post an accident and aren't generally relied upon 100% because people can move around in flight...

Anyhow as for this event goes a lot of detailed info doesn't get retained long after flight completion, and in some countries there are restrictions on holding detailed data in systems just in case it might be useful.

I guess it's possible Wizz or someone might still have a basic list of those onboard, but it's also entirely possible they might not have retained a detailed seating plan.

I’m so sorry you had to go through this that’s horrible.

they will absolutely be able to identify them, there are only so many passengers on the flight. Wizzair are being useless

That's not much comfort if it turns physical with 3 big men in the air.

This is Whizz Air, probably the lowest of the low budget airlines, not likely to be remotely concerned as long as the staff manage to sell a lot of beer.

The number of cameras at an airport and they can’t identify them… bull (from the police)

Makes you despair. I would be so sad and angry in your shoes, just a virtual hug. Whoever passes this off as 'drunken banter' need to remember men aided and abetted by other men have committed the most awful atrocities towards women and girls and sometimes I worry that only a thin veneer of 'civilization' stops it. I hope these excuses for human beings get their comeuppance in one form or another. They probably have wives and daughters of their own.

If it escalates the air crew staff has the responsibility to sort it. They are trained for this.

The staff won't remember this incident weeks after it happened as it was only a remark on the way out.

May be worth a complaint to the airline, but I am not sure where you will get with it. I'm so sorry this happened to you and your DD. Similar things happened to me when mine were little, over 2 decades ago. AND I got nasty things said to me too by drunk men when I was young/a teen - 40-ish years ago. And it's so horrible. How flippin' depressing that it never stops. Hope you and your DD are OK. (((((HUGS!)))))

Hi OP,
I can relate to some extent.
I was travelling on a train with my son (16 years) when some awful druggie started shouting at his mate "I'm gonna knock you out and knock out everyone on this train" - a claim he repeated several times. Complete silence in the carriage from all other travellers.

When he got off the train I asked other travellers what station it was he got off at and reported the incident online to the British Transport Police as well as my fear for anyone at the station he got off at. The form was long and repetitive and I realised not really geared towards making an emergency report.

I heard from the Transport Police after a few days to say there would be no evidence/no ability to identify the person but they would record it for statistical purposes.

I thought this was pretty poor as I would expect that there would be CCTV at the station if not on the train and the guy had tattoos right up his neck and head so pretty identifiable.

Anyway we lived to tell the tale but given the same circumstances I would put my phone on silent and try to discreetly record the man - at least his voice if not his image. (Obviously don't do this if you would put yourself at risk). I also believe it is possible to contact 999 by text if you have registered for this service in advance (no good on a plane of course). I think this would have been useful for me as no way could I have verbally phoned the police as the guy would have smacked me I'm sure. The transport police should offer this as it's hard to phone up about someone you are stuck with.

In hindsight you should probably have told cabin crew as the guys were committing an offence being drunk and abusive on an aircraft. However you don't know how that would have worked out and it could have escalated things. I know it is hard as you are rightly angry but your actions did help to make sure you, your daughter and other members of the public landed safely. I understand you will be fuming if there is no consequence for those men.

It's a shame you don't have video. The aggressor in my case was a hopeless druggie but it sounds like the men in your case would have jobs and families to make them ashamed of their behaviour.

Let yourself process what happened and be kind to yourself. Sometimes there isn't a right answer.

Edit to add - if they cant/won't track down the men then complaining and asking for action aken on the excessive sale of alcohol would be something.

Sending big mumsy hugs to you! I think you need to show your daughter the right way to act in this situation. Don't let this drop, but remain calm and dogged. Don't let her think this is acceptable and that you'll give up trying to protect her. It's awful and you shouldn't have to, and I'm sorry that you faced this.

I feel the same. If OP was minded to do so, she could target eg FeMail (sorry, the dreadful DM) and see if they would front a campaign persuading airlines to sell alcohol responsibly.

Yeah, me too. I would not have been able to keep my mouth shut if a man said that about my dd. Not a chance

A huge well done for pursuing this. You handled it as well as anyone can at the time, so dont overthink your actions.

It is amazing how easily we can blame alcohol and dismiss things. I had a drunk guy keep putting his hand back to grope me on a flight and was so grateful to the older women I was sat next to for pushing his hand away and sandwiching me between them as we got off as he tried to stand next to me. Im confident enough now to deal with that but wasn't at that point and just froze, blaming myself for if i had smiled in response to him as I got on the plane. Actually, decent men dont behave like that when drunk or sober.

I would take it as far as you can for those without the confidence or voice to, and to show your ten year old that it isnt acceptable.

This is the first thread I’ve ever seen on here that I hope gets picked up by the mainstream press.

What a horrible experience for you OP.

Dreadful comment. I would have quietly told cabin crew and asked them how they intended to handle the situation. I would also have written to Wizz Air about their policy on selling alcohol and their responsibility to create an environment that is pleasant for all customers, including children. I would not have been upset in the least but I would have been angry, because women have to deal with this kind of rubbish too often and it's such a waste of energy.

I don't think you should leave it. I am not sure if the CAA or Ombudsman are the next steps as if there is not the means to identify passengers, what would happen were there a crash? At the very least let your MP know, assuming it's someone worth dealing with and not a Reform or other misogynist.

Wizz are absolutely useless and don't care about anything except taking the passengers' money so I wouldn't expect anything from them but report the whole thing to the aviation ombudsman, especially the fact the Wizz staff continued to serve already drunk men.

Yes, this. What the actual fuck? Vile specimen.

I wouldn't expect anything from Wizz Air. I chased them for months to get my money back after they cancelled our flight at the last minute. They never paid up.