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Original poster

Depressed - husband doesn’t want another baby

208 replies

Adeline261 · 01/09/2026 10:01

I feel horribly depressed and low at the moment because I really yearn for another baby but my husband doesn’t. I understand I can’t change his mind and haven’t tried but I’m really struggling. We’ve already got two lovely boys almost 6 and 4. They’re a handful but great fun.
I just don’t know how to feel better. The word sad doesn’t cover it, I feel horrible every single day. I struggle being around my friends who are pregnant and hearing about larger families with 3 or 4 children physically pains me.
I came from a small insular family so I’ve always wanted a larger family. I thought I had outlined this to my husband when we met. Obviously not well enough.
What do I do?
Already in therapy

OP posts:
EverytimeItPours · 01/09/2026 10:08

RampantIvy · 01/09/2026 10:06

You need to find a way of accepting the two healthy children you aleady have and to quit while you are ahead.

Do you work?

This!

Purplecatshopaholic · 01/09/2026 10:08

rrrrrreatt · 01/09/2026 10:05

I don’t think it matters how well you outlined it to him, the reality of having children is different to the idea and people are allowed to change their mind.

You either need to make your peace with his feelings or leave him so you can potentially have another child with someone else.

This. Make peace with it, or break up your family. Sorry op. Stick with the therapy. You have two lovely, healthy, happy children - seriously, focus there.

Mulledjuice · 01/09/2026 10:07

read your OP again and imagine this was a friend of yours confiding in you. what would you advise her?

LarryForPrimeMinister · 01/09/2026 10:07

Either you leave him and try and find someone else to have more children with or you just sadly need to accept it is what it is.

RampantIvy · 01/09/2026 10:06

You need to find a way of accepting the two healthy children you aleady have and to quit while you are ahead.

Do you work?

rrrrrreatt · 01/09/2026 10:05

I don’t think it matters how well you outlined it to him, the reality of having children is different to the idea and people are allowed to change their mind.

You either need to make your peace with his feelings or leave him so you can potentially have another child with someone else.

DaisyChain505 · 01/09/2026 10:04

There’s nothing you can do. You can’t force someone to want another child and it sounds like you need to start trying really hard to be grateful for what you already have. I could understand more if you were childless or just have one child but you don’t, you have two.

There are plenty of people in the world that would do anything to have what you have.

Keep the therapy up and if you feel it isn’t working try a new therapist.

Original poster
Adeline261 · 01/09/2026 10:03

Just to add, my husband does talk to me about it and validates my feelings but it doesn’t change how he feels about it (not that I’m trying to). We can’t talk about it that much because his job is really demanding at the moment

OP posts:
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