To increase this clients charge ?

I'd remove 'you're lucky to have me' - she'll definitely blow even even more over that.

Ah cross posted. Good luck.

And this is why it would make sense for you to let her go as a client. She has manipulated you so much that you continue to second guess yourself. It’s very hard I know but consider an alternative explanation for what she is doing.

She thinks she can continue to manipulate you and from what your reactions it looks as if she is indeed able to manipulate you.

if you chose to reply that you, too, value your friendship and do not want to put that at risk so will no longer have her as your client, you will get a chance to see just how much of a friend or family you are to her, when you are not providing cheap labour.

You might wait a long time for her to do something positive for you. Not manipulate you. Not take advantage of your good nature. Something concrete for you.

As for her bad mouthing you to other clients. They will weigh the great service they get from you against her poor me tale. They might not say do to her face but they are unlikely to give you up in solidarity.

Good cleaners are in very short supply. Your other clients know they are onto a good thing. Please stop wasting your time on someone who does not value you, does not treat you well. Concentrate your time and energy for people who treat you well. Not make empty protestations about friendship and family while doing nothing but manipulate you.

it’s a hard lesson to learn but absolutely essential to run a successful business and live a good life.

Honestly, I think you need to get rid of her for your own peace of mind. If not, this will keep happening and you will continue to suffer.

If you keep her on at a discounted rate (even a higher discounted rate than before) then her manipulation of you is still working.

She's not showing you any compassion or consideration at all. You shouldn't have to walk on eggshells to do your job.

Bread and butter my arse. Cheap toast bread and margarine at best!

Expecting mates rates from someone who is doing a low-paying job is a massive pisstake. It's not like, say, being a shit-hot lawyer getting hundreds of pounds per hour and dispensing a bit of legal advice to you friends for free, or popping round to your nan's to have a look at the boiler on a sunday.

She 's a user. She could just as easily turn it round and say "I would have to pay a stranger x amount to clean my house, I would much rather give that money to a friend"

At one point, I think you said that she has an adult daughter, but you don't know anything about their relationship? I think if you were 'family' you would know more about her. Have you ever in your friendship felt like you and she were 'family'? That close? Or do you think she's just trying to guilt trip you?

OP this woman is a user. She is not your friend. Id get out of the arrangement.

In a normal arrangement you say "my fees have gone up, they are now x". If they are not happy they can go elsewhere.

You need to tell her that her reaction has upset you and she clearly thinks it's Okay to underpay you which is not friend or family behaviour. Get another client and drop her.

Of course she's going to say she will pay (grudgingly) where else is she going to get cheap cleaning and pet care. Stop letting her manipulate you. My cleaner charges me £20/hr north west uk. Pet care would be extra.

Unless she is 90 you are both going to outlive the cat so what does it matter that she is leaving it to you in the will?

She is being very manipulative. Step away from cleaning saying you don't want a transactional relationship so it's better that take business out of it.

This.

She's taking advantage of you.

Assertive response to this:
I do an excellent job for you, I am very reliable and for that I deserve a living wage. To be honest, there are so many chancers out there, I think you're lucky to have me.

Your daughter did well dealing with that rip off situation. OP keep reading this particular post and do the same thing.

I’d leave it until she’s back and have a chat in person.

“Friend, I really value our friendship and I don’t want money to damage the relationship. For that reason I’m giving you X weeks notice that I’m going to stop cleaning for you. That way we can focus on our friendship and I can pet sit for you.”

You can then fill that slot with full rate paying client.

Sounds like she cant afford a cleaner then

How much has this cost you OP?
Exactly how much?
You are probably giving her a free holiday?
Is anyone giving you a free holiday?
Cat sitters are expensive.
It really benefits her to manipulate you.

I’m confused. Is she the single parent or did you mean yourself?

Because if she’s a single parent but she can also afford a cleaner and a pet, I really don’t see what she’s struggling with.

My sister and I have a small cleaning business. First rule is to never become over friendly with clients. We are friendly and kind especially to the older clients who often need a bit of extra help but they are work to us and cannot be anything more. I used to be a personal assistant for disabled people and the same rule applied. When you work in people’s homes it’s very easy to cross that line but you can bet your bottom dollar it will go tits up if you do.

Sadly this lady is manipulating you and taking the piss. We had a client like this, she was very good with her passive aggressive comments but she just wore us down in the end. We let her go last month and the relief was instant.

Could you continue to look after her pet if you’re attached, but say for the sake of your friendship you need to stop cleaning? It is your job. She’s your friend too, but she’s not cleaning for you because that’s not her job, and if she can pay the going rate for nails, she can pay the going rate for a cleaner!

she will have the ‘ privilege’ for doing so as she needs me

See? That language is very manipulative with a nasty edge to it. The crying and guilt tripping....no, not fair. "I thought we were family"...wail...no, you're not. She's now going to blank you until she gets home and fair enough no-one wants to deal with domestic issues whilst you're trying to enjoy your holiday but I'd be very cautious about her manipulating you further when she has you face to face.
She should appreciate that you do her a favour charging her well below market rate. Does she know how much you've saved her? And yet she can afford some of the nicer things in life because she 'works so hard'. Reframe that!
As for the cat, did she say it's in the will without consulting you? There is no legal obligation on your part but it's a cheek not to ask first (if, indeed, that's for real - it's all emotional blackmail). She's wily, you're maybe a bit soft and she's taking advantage of that.

Is it a cleaner? I was thinking dog walker?

Friends don't screw each over like this and use them.

She is a grifter and you have absolutely been taken for a ride.

Best to send a message above that it would be a shame to spoil the friendship, so you will find someone else for the slot.

You won't see your "friend" for dust🙄.

Having a cleaner is a luxury. If she can’t afford it, she should clean her own house. Tell her you need to work for the full market rate to pay your own bills. I doubt very much she has a formal will drawn up by a solicitor if she is this tight, but if she wants to pay to change it, so be it. Chances are she will outlive the pet by many years.