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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to make a roast when my daughter asked me not to?

507 replies

TURTLE74 · 30/08/2026 23:19

Adult daughter 22 is not a fan of roast dinners. She asked me if I could not do a roast dinner today and make something else which I agreed to. However I had a chicken in freezer that needed using up today but I did make a pasta bake which is something she likes as an alternative. I like to make a family dinner on a Sunday for us all. Daughter was disappointed about the roast but I explained to her I had to use chicken up but I did make something she liked as alternative. She said to me you told me you wouldn’t make a roast and she looked upset. She didn’t go hungry though as she had Cottage Pie after saying there’s nothing to eat. AIBU to of made the roast even though there was pasta dish as alternative or was she being unreasonable here as I feel bad about it.

OP posts:
hididdlyho · 31/08/2026 07:25

At 22 she's old enough to leave the house by herself and buy her own food if the meal you've cooked doesn't suit her. I wouldn't have offered an alternative and suggested she can take a turn cooking for the family next week, then she can choose something she wants to eat.

Greebocat · 31/08/2026 07:25

i think people are being a bit unkind to you, you had your reasons for wanting to use the chicken that day, whether it was in the fridge or the freezer. Your daughter was totally out of order, reasonable to not want a roast completely unreasonable to ask you not to cook one for everyone else and then look upset because you did, especially as you cooked her an alternative.

myrtleWilson · 31/08/2026 07:24

I suspect Turtle (only these posts under that name) is rather regretting the freezer slip up in their original post as it’s serving as a distraction from intended purpose of whipping up a storm about her putative 22yr old daughter.

Willope · 31/08/2026 07:24

Alittlefrustrated · 31/08/2026 06:19

Feel obliged to point out that there are indeed dates by which you are supposed to eat frozen foods. Dates differ for types of food.
Unless you are absolutely certain that food will be used before those dates, items should be marked with the date when placed in the freezer.
Chicken is a food that people can tend to treat with a little more caution re dates.
DD was being unreasonable,unless you have a strong history of just ignoring her requests OP and deliberately doing the opposite.

Indeed, but I don’t know anyone IRL that’s ever paid any attention whatsoever to this part of the blurb on food (‘freeze on day of purchase and eat within 2 months’ etc).

until now.

TheBlueKoala · 31/08/2026 07:24

TURTLE74 · 31/08/2026 00:15

Daughter did not ask for any other dish to be made she said can we not have roast but I made her pasta bake

Show quote history

Sorry but she's an entitled young lady. You are not doing her any favours pandering to her behaviour.

MellowSubmarine · 31/08/2026 07:24

Needmorelego · 30/08/2026 23:50

Did you ask her if she wanted a pasta bake?
It's a bit random to cook one if you didn't know if she wanted it.

She’s 22, with 3 meal options, all cooked for her by someone else! OP isn’t a cook in a restaurant making whatever her DD orders.

She’s unreasonable to fuss about her multiple meal options.
She’s very unreasonable to expect that not only she doesn’t eat a roast, no one else does either.

Meadowfinch · 31/08/2026 07:20

TURTLE74 · 30/08/2026 23:27

Cottage pie was from last night. I don’t like using chicken past it’s sell by date. She didn’t fancy the pasta bake.

If so, why bother freezing it. The sell by date is for when it is fresh & uncooked.

Freezing it suspends degradation literally for months.

Cooking in-date meat kills existing bacteria, meaning it will keep for an additional few days.

At 22, your dd can make her own food if she doesn't like what you cook. So you are both unreasonable.

Westfacing · 31/08/2026 07:20

Have you put the uneaten pasta bake in the freezer?

OhNoooooooooooooooo · 31/08/2026 07:17

fiveyo · 31/08/2026 05:36

Did you roast the chicken from frozen? It sounds like all this happened in the space of 1 day - how did you defrost the chicken?

You can roast from frozen.

OhNoooooooooooooooo · 31/08/2026 07:15

TURTLE74 · 30/08/2026 23:27

Cottage pie was from last night. I don’t like using chicken past it’s sell by date. She didn’t fancy the pasta bake.

😂😂😂😀. Why bother freezing it then.??

Dollymylove · 31/08/2026 07:13

Methinks its about time DD was shown the door. Then she can cook and eat what she wishes.
And do the washing up ...

Kindling1970 · 31/08/2026 07:13

I’m so confused by this whole scenario and so confused about why you are posting asking about this. Your daughter is obviously a spoilt brat, why can’t you see this and tell her? Honestly the way some children manipulate and bully their wet blanket mothers on here and the mum wonders if she’s the problem.

Empress13 · 31/08/2026 07:05

PuppyMonkey · 31/08/2026 07:00

A very compelling thread.

Why is this even a thread ? Jeez first world problems!

MarthaLovesLaughing · 31/08/2026 07:03

Don't make promises and then break them

Learn the chemistry of freezing food

HTH

Thegirlwhowent · 31/08/2026 07:02

TURTLE74 · 30/08/2026 23:23

Because of the date

Show quote history

I don't bother with dates on anything frozen. They're always fine.

Thegirlwhowent · 31/08/2026 07:01

I voted YABU - not because you did the roast but because you even thought you might be being unreasonable! Cook what you like and tell DD if she doesn't like it she can make her own dinner.

Empress13 · 31/08/2026 07:01

TURTLE74 · 30/08/2026 23:23

Because of the date

Show quote history

You do know what freezing means? If you freeze it from fresh when you bought it then the whole idea of freezing it is that it will last past the use by date ! Your DD needs to grow up and cook her own if she doesn’t like it after all you did her pasta bake

PuppyMonkey · 31/08/2026 07:00

A very compelling thread.

TimeDoesntStandStill · 31/08/2026 06:59

ByPeachPeer · 30/08/2026 23:26

Why did a frozen chicken need eating today? Where did the cottage pie come from? Why didn't she eat the pasta bake?

Edited

This

JoshLymanSwagger · 31/08/2026 06:54

Well, OP, I hope you've learned your lesson.

Don't cook for someone rude and ungrateful from now on.

She's 22 and can buy and cook her own meals for a while or go to McDonalds

MrsVBS · 31/08/2026 06:50

She’s 22 not 2, she’s old enough to have her own place and cook her own meals. If she doesn’t like it point her in the direction of a shop!

AmnesiacsDream · 31/08/2026 06:49

If you like a family meal on a Sunday, I think it's sort of unreasonable to have something that a member of the family doesn't like. It's not as though a roast is the only thing you can do with a chicken.

On the other hand, you made her something she likes and fed her so she shouldn't be whining.

Itwasallyellow2 · 31/08/2026 06:46

This is the kind of behaviour I expect from a 2 year old.

What does she do for a job OP? Does she get upset when people make a Victoria Sponge for the office when she wanted a Lemon Drizzle?

Slightyamusedandsilly · 31/08/2026 06:35

TURTLE74 · 30/08/2026 23:27

Cottage pie was from last night. I don’t like using chicken past it’s sell by date. She didn’t fancy the pasta bake.

This is ridiculous. She had a choice of:

Cottage pie
Roast
Pasta bake

and still wasn't happy? I think she needs to take on a week of cooking family dinners.

Cantyouseethishorselovesme · 31/08/2026 06:25

crochetandshit · 31/08/2026 03:32

I was hoping I'd get back to sleep after waking up and hour ago but that's out the fucking window now as I need to go and empty my freezers into the bin 😭

I am reading this at 6.23 a.m and you made me laugh so hard I have to clean up spilled coffee.