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AIBU?

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To think this is outrageously irresponsible parenting

189 replies

CaffeinatedMum · 30/08/2026 21:52

On holiday in France at a Eurocamp park. Yesterday I was in the outdoor pool and noticed a little boy maybe around 18 months, certainly no older than a young 2, bobbing around by himself in a float vest. For context my six year old was out of his depth in all of this pool apart from the steps to get in, so it wasn’t a toddler type splash pool.

I watched him for a minute as he didn’t seem to have anyone with him and then both me and another lady went up to him to ask him where his mummy or daddy was, obviously he didn’t reply as was very young. Led him to the steps and his older sister came rushing up to him, I can’t imagine she was more than five (considerably smaller than my six year old).

Long story short, the parents were watching the kids from the bar nearby with their friends. This isn’t a pool bar and they weren’t in swimwear. it’s the other side of a gate and foot bath. So yes you can see the kids but you’re a fair distance away, not just on a lounger next to it,

They absolutely fell about with laughter when their son was helped out of the pool.

I genuinely can’t believe how irresponsible this parenting was… I am assuming I will get a unanimous YANBU but obviously there are parents out there who think this is not only ok but funny.

Now kicking myself for not saying anything to them about it but didn’t want to cause a scene, they were quite a big intimidating group standing their laughing their heads off.

OP posts:
Beepen · 01/09/2026 07:49

Sadly I am unsurprised
I reported some parents at my private gym pool as I was swimming lengths and they came in with a 3 year old and a 5 year old who could not swim well then proceeded to sit poolside staring at their phones

And when my children were little I lost count of the number of toddlers I fished out of the paddling pool in the park while their parents were obliviously staring at their phones.

Beepen · 01/09/2026 07:45

birdofparadise26 · 31/08/2026 06:27

I am not seeing where there is any liability for the site owners. It’s all a bit ‘tell the teacher’ isn’t it?

Of course there would be liability. They would face an awful harrowing investigation

It's definitely not "tell the teacher". The owners deserve to know and be given the chance to take action

HeyThereDelila · 01/09/2026 07:23

YANBU. That poor little boy.

If you’re still at the holiday park it’s worth reporting it.

TheGlitterFairy · 01/09/2026 07:19

So much poor parenting in and around the poolside. We saw this in Greece this year. DH and I spent all day every day in the pool with DS; supervising, watching him play, playing etc - SO many kids in the water on their own with no parents nearby but expecting us to watch theirs. It’s so irresponsible but also unfair. My holiday is with my family; it’s my job to look after my child - which I do but not my job to look after other children when they’re on a sunlounger with a cocktail. I sent many a child over to where their parents were (other side of kids pool) as frankly don’t want to be supervising half of the under 5s in the water!!

Packofsix · 01/09/2026 06:49

Oh I would have said something for sure. And also reported it to staff

Peonies12 · 01/09/2026 06:07

That’s awful, has really upset me. I don’t like flotation devices as I think it’s enabling irresponsible behaviour like this. I’d have reported it to the camp staff

DeftGoldHedgehog · 01/09/2026 05:43

CaffeinatedMum · 31/08/2026 13:59

Few people saying European people are more laid back / better swimmers from a young age… the family were all British!

It also worries me in a way when kids can swim from a young age, it gives some parents carte blanche to not be in the pool with them when they still ought to be supervising closely and in the water with them. Yes, ok, the child might have less risk of drowning with lessons, but they are still little and you need to be with them.

GarlicAnything · 01/09/2026 00:17

Namenamchange · 30/08/2026 23:13

No, but would be blaming someone else

I once pulled out a girl of about 8 who was drowning - I'd been keeping an eye on her, she just sank quietly to the bottom of the pool. She was unconscious. I turned her upside down and passed her to the parents, who'd belatedly appeared from the bar.They went mad at me for handling their child 🙄

Did anyone see last week's thread from a MNer who had a four-year-old pestering her all day, as his parents didn't want to know?

Hollyhobbi · 01/09/2026 00:05

Optimisticdramalarma · 31/08/2026 08:30

Ds was about 10 (ish) and a bloody strong swimmer

I was at the side of the pool (heavily pregnant and ghe size of a double decker bus) with his much younger siblings (who where in the buggy)

I turned for a second not noticing as had come up behind us and he slipped and fell in

It was that fast-thankfully the lifeguard got him out and he was fine

I was sat there,watching them closely and in the second it took to pass his brother a drink,he'd fallen in

I've never been so scared in my whole life-thankfully he made a massive splash and the lifeguard got him out as I realised what had happened

How anyone can wander off and leave them is beyond me

My father is a gardener (he does it all the organic way-no chemicals) and part of this is having frogs in his garden

It's not unusual to be at theirs and a frog jumps past

The 'pond' is ds's old baby bath-its not a massive pond but big enough for frogspawn/a handful of frogs

To get to it,you have to walk down to the greenhouse at the bottom of the garden,wade through about 5 feet of nettles and hunt for it (you wouldn't see it until you stood in it)

I never let the dc in that garden without an adult (normally me as my parents would have wandered off)

My parents thought it was overkill and 'it wouldn't happen' (my parents just don't see danger-'it'll be right' is their catchphrase) but it was still a risk-no matter how small

Not a chance would I have left them to be near water on their own-and it still happened with me next to him

Your ds was 10 and a strong swimmer so why were you worried when he fell in?

Absolutelynot2 · 31/08/2026 23:46

Blakeley · 31/08/2026 14:21

When my son was younger and having swimming lessons a woman used to come to the pool every week with a very young toddler, she looked like she was maybe his grandmother not mum. She’d leave him in the toddler pool and go and do lengths by herself in the adult pool. She’d leave wouldn’t once even look at him. I would spend every Saturday watching this child whilst my husband watched our son as I was terrified he’d drown. Some people are so clueless on the dangers of water.

Edited

They're not clueless, they just don't care. When people show you who they are, and all that.

Kickinthenostalgia · 31/08/2026 22:46

When I was in Florida, there was a kid about the same age in the pool by himself, parents were actually at the side but I still thought he was a bit young to be by himself.

UnintentionalArcher · 31/08/2026 22:24

Optimisticdramalarma · 31/08/2026 16:41

I work i retail (think golden arches)

The building is a two story building-walk in and the stairs are to the right

I cannot count how many times parents walk in,dart upstairs to order their food and then stare,slack jawed into their phones while the kids run riot (which is bad enough)

It's no fun walking around with hot food and drinks and a child runs out in front of you

Outside the main door (past the world's smallest carpark) is a very busy main road-cars zoom down it

Many is the time I've had to grab a toddler just before they get flattened and when you go with them to find their parent,they've not even noticed the child has gone (nor do they seem to care)

One family do it so often (no matter how many times we've 'had a word') I'm amazed she's still got all 5 kids still alive

Her youngest was 13 months when I dragged her away from going under a car-mum was upstairs,gawping at her phone and ignoring her dd's (God knows where the other two where)

Didn't bat an eyelid when I told her what had happened but she'd be the first to howl that it's everyone else's fault if the kid got run over

That is truly shocking. This thread is so upsetting to read.

Minasama · 31/08/2026 22:24

Optimisticdramalarma · 31/08/2026 16:41

I work i retail (think golden arches)

The building is a two story building-walk in and the stairs are to the right

I cannot count how many times parents walk in,dart upstairs to order their food and then stare,slack jawed into their phones while the kids run riot (which is bad enough)

It's no fun walking around with hot food and drinks and a child runs out in front of you

Outside the main door (past the world's smallest carpark) is a very busy main road-cars zoom down it

Many is the time I've had to grab a toddler just before they get flattened and when you go with them to find their parent,they've not even noticed the child has gone (nor do they seem to care)

One family do it so often (no matter how many times we've 'had a word') I'm amazed she's still got all 5 kids still alive

Her youngest was 13 months when I dragged her away from going under a car-mum was upstairs,gawping at her phone and ignoring her dd's (God knows where the other two where)

Didn't bat an eyelid when I told her what had happened but she'd be the first to howl that it's everyone else's fault if the kid got run over

I would imagine that a large percentage of people who have five children may be lacking in responsibility, except the ones who are very well off. It’s hardly something a responsible person would do otherwise.

UnintentionalArcher · 31/08/2026 22:21

dreamiesformolly · 31/08/2026 15:15

It is. When I was little I was often laughed at for being upset or angry. People think small kids don't register this kind of thing, but I can still remember the feelings of hurt and utter powerlessness it caused me. Some people really shouldn't be parents.

I’m so sorry you experienced this. You’re right that some people shouldn’t be parents.

Optimisticdramalarma · 31/08/2026 22:13

daisychain01 · 31/08/2026 10:22

it does make you wonder how so many children survive their parents' idiocy.

just yesterday I was cycle along a main road and there was a father who clearly thought he was Dad of the Year, cycling with what could only have been a 2 year old tot on the handlebars of his bike. Not only that, he had a cordon on his bike attached to a second child's bike pulling the child along.

I mean talk about spot the brain cell. It was a tragedy waiting to happen, he only needed one distraction to lose his balance and that tiny little child will have been thrown off and been crushed.

As I've said,I work in a maccies drive thru and you'd be amazed at how many parents who allow their kids to dangle their heads out of the windows/climb about the car unstrapped/stand up with their heads out of the sunroof (we see them coming in on the cttv)

Every bloody shift-nothing surprises me anymore

It makes me die inside-one sharp brake or a car passing an inch too close and those kids are dead

Some people shouldn't bloody breed

Minasama · 31/08/2026 22:11

Some people are just thick and selfish. I’m shocked though, poor little things.

EvieBB · 31/08/2026 21:55

CaffeinatedMum · 30/08/2026 21:52

On holiday in France at a Eurocamp park. Yesterday I was in the outdoor pool and noticed a little boy maybe around 18 months, certainly no older than a young 2, bobbing around by himself in a float vest. For context my six year old was out of his depth in all of this pool apart from the steps to get in, so it wasn’t a toddler type splash pool.

I watched him for a minute as he didn’t seem to have anyone with him and then both me and another lady went up to him to ask him where his mummy or daddy was, obviously he didn’t reply as was very young. Led him to the steps and his older sister came rushing up to him, I can’t imagine she was more than five (considerably smaller than my six year old).

Long story short, the parents were watching the kids from the bar nearby with their friends. This isn’t a pool bar and they weren’t in swimwear. it’s the other side of a gate and foot bath. So yes you can see the kids but you’re a fair distance away, not just on a lounger next to it,

They absolutely fell about with laughter when their son was helped out of the pool.

I genuinely can’t believe how irresponsible this parenting was… I am assuming I will get a unanimous YANBU but obviously there are parents out there who think this is not only ok but funny.

Now kicking myself for not saying anything to them about it but didn’t want to cause a scene, they were quite a big intimidating group standing their laughing their heads off.

It makes my blood boil to hear that parents like this exist. They are not fit to look after a pet, let alone a child! Disgusting.

EvieBB · 31/08/2026 21:53

REDB99 · 30/08/2026 22:33

You get these types of parents everywhere. I was away recently in a very busy theme park, there was a little girl who was about 3 clearly in distress, she appeared lost and was wandering about. Me and three other people stopped and went to get a staff member. Parents were sitting on a bench about 100 yards away laughing at her distress. They eventually got up and came over when it was clear several people were concerned about her. Of course if anything did happen it would be someone else’s fault,

Disgusting abusive parenting. That poor girl

AnneElliott · 31/08/2026 20:38

Completely irresponsible people. I recall a 2 year old once at a beach (we were on a school trip). He’d walked round the headland and came to join us playing - his parents were on the other side of the cliffs chatting a drinking and hadn’t noticed he’d walked all the way round past the headland. Thank god the tide was going out! They were completely unperturbed when we made it clear he’d been in danger.

RemindMeIn15Minutes · 31/08/2026 20:28

Fuckers!

TheignT · 31/08/2026 20:24

A child died during a school swimming lesson. The school subsequently introduced a very good swimming programme. They hired the top swimming coach in the city and every year the year two children had an intensive two week swimming course with her in September. Any child who couldn't swim at least 10metres redid the intensive two week course the following May. On the rare occasions a child still couldn't swim they redid the two week course with the new year twos in September. Every child in that school could swim at least 10 metres by the September if year three.

A terrible tragedy which led to a swimming programme that I think should go nationwide.

Dollymylove · 31/08/2026 20:16

Taking my granddaughter to soft play was an eye opener for me. Mum's sat round a table gossiping/scrolling with backs turned, I witnessed several toddlers no more than about 18 months old wandering into the older children's area, one of them was knocked over accidentally by another child, toddler screaming, mother finally looked round then started kicking off about the older child "not taking care" while legitimately playing in the area.
Ranting at the child's mother calling her child feral.
I nearly intervened and told the mother to parent her child properly. I changed my mind when I saw the length of her nails 🤣

Bigreddog25 · 31/08/2026 18:44

The main reason I'm put off All inclusive hotel holidays (I used to love them) is because I can't cope with all the shit parenting. Drunk parents giving zero fucks about their children.

I was in Mexico in 2023 and a 4 year old girl drowned in the pool. Huge group of about 15 adults all at the bar getting drunk. Whilst the kid drowns. Fucking twats.

Tralalalala88 · 31/08/2026 17:51

Unbelievably irresponsible. I would call this negligence to be honest . Who the hell would have a child that age in the pool and not be right next to them ? It’s crazy

dizzydizzydizzy · 31/08/2026 17:39

YANBU.

Ex lifeguard here. Very very risky behaviour. Drowning is silent. I once had to rescue a small child wearing a float vest thing. His parents were getting out of the pool and he was following them (so they both momentarily had their backs to him) and in that moment he decided to take his jacket off and swim. Obviously, the child should have got out after the first parent and before the second - a moment of thoughtlessness that could have ended in tragedy. He could stand up on the water too. All my rescues were weak or non-swimmers in shallow water. Being able to stand up in water doesn’t necessarily help if you can’t swim.